1.

I WANT A NIGHTMARE

Before the final examination, Tom told his mother, "Mom, I had a dream last night that I' passed today's exam." "Don't trust dreams, dear. It is said what you experience in dreams usually turns out to be the opposite." Mother replied. "Then I do hope I'll fail the other subjects n my dream tonight," Tom said.

想做坏梦

在期末考试之前，汤姆告诉他的母亲："妈妈，我昨天晚上做了一个梦，梦见我通过了今天的考试。""不要相信梦，亲爱的。据说梦中的经历通常与现实相反。"妈妈答道。"那么，我真希望在今晚的梦中，我的其他功课都不及格。"汤姆说。

2.

TOM'S EXCUSE

teacher: Tom, why are you late for school every day?

Tom: Every time I come to the corner, a sign says, "School-Go Slow".

汤姆的借口

老师：汤姆，您为什么每天上学迟到？

汤姆：我每次路过拐角，一个路标上面写着："学校----慢行。"

3.

DID YOUR DAD HELP YOU?

One day, Tim's mathematics teacher looked at his homework and saw that he had got all his sums right. The teacher was very pleased-and rather surprised. He called Tim to his desk and said to him, "You got all your homework right this time, Tim. What happened? Did your father help you?"

"No, sir. He was too busy last night, so I had to do it all myself," said Tim.

你爸爸帮你了吗？

一天，蒂姆的数学老师看了他的作业，发现他全做对了。老师很高兴，同时也十分惊讶。他把蒂姆叫到桌前说："蒂姆，你这次的作业全都做对了，怎么回事？你爸爸帮你做了吗？" "不，先生，我爸爸昨天很忙，我不得不全由自己做了。"

4.

MODERN LIFE

Two old friends got together after many years and soon fell to discussing their husbands' faults.

"We've been married fifteen years," one woman said, "and every night after dinner my husband always complains about the food."

"How terrible!" exclaimed the other. "Does it bother you?"

"Why should it bother me?" her friend replied. "if he can't only stand his own cooking?"

现代生活

两个老朋友分别多年之后又见面了，很快就开始谈起各自丈夫的缺点。

"我们结婚十五年了，"一个妇女说道，"每天晚饭后，我丈夫总要抱怨饭菜。"

"真可恶！"另一个惊呼道。"难道你不烦吗？"

"我烦什么？"她的朋友答道。"他不过是忍受不了自己的烹调技术。"
关键字:笑话幽默
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