1X02: AH, BUT UNDERNEATH

Original Airdate on ABC: October 10, 2004

Previously on Desperate Housewives.

(MARY ALICE takes a box off a shelf in the closet. Looking worried and distraught, she shakily puts a revolver to her temple. We see a finger pulling the trigger, and a loud shot is heard. The camera stays on the YOUNG family picture, as the blurred reflection of MARY ALICE is shown in the frame of the picture falling to the ground.)

(Cut to: )

GABRIELLE: If Mary Alice was having some sort of crisis, we'd have known. She lives 50 feet away, for God's sakes.

SUSAN: Gabby, the woman killed herself. Something must've been going on.

(Cut to: )

GABRIELLE: Every time I'm around that man, he tries to grab my ass!

CARLOS: I made over $200,000 doing business with him last year. If he wants to grab your ass, you let him.

(Cut to: )

JOHN: Why aren't you happy?

GABRIELLE: Turns out I wanted all the wrong things.

(Cut to: )

GABRIELLE: What's that?

BREE: It's a letter, addressed to Mary Alice.

(GABRIELLE and LYNETTE read the piece of paper. They pass it to SUSAN, who reads the note with BREE looking over her shoulder.)

I KNOW WHAT YOU DID

IT MAKES ME SICK

I'M GOING TO TELL

SUSAN: Oh Mary Alice, what did you do?

OPEN ON: [EXT. GRAVEYARD -- DAY]

(We open on a lily flower planted on the ground of the graveyard. We pan to Mary Alice's freshly buried grave, where we see her tombstone :

MARY ALICE YOUNG

11.18.65 - 9.26.04

Beloved Wife and Mother

There are two bunches of orangey-red roses on either side of the tombstone.)

NARRATOR: An odd thing happens when we die. Our senses vanish . Taste, touch, smell and sound become a distant memory. But our sight, ah, our sight expands. And we can suddenly see the world we've left behind so clearly. Of course, most of what's visible to the dead can also be seen by the living, if they only take the time to look .

(Cut to: GABRIELLE, with her eyes closed, naked as she lies underwater in her bathtub, holding her breath.)

NARRATOR: Like my friend Gabrielle. I should've seen how unhappy she was. But I didn't. I only saw her clothes from Paris;

(Flashback to: GABRIELLE giggling as she twirls, wearing a beautiful black dress, walking towards CARLOS, who takes her hand and pulls her towards him, kissing her.)

NARRATOR: And her platinum jewellery;

(Cut to: GABRIELLE, holding her hair back, excited as CARLOS fastens a necklace around her neck, a piece of paper, presumably the bill!, wedged in his mouth.)

NARRATOR: And her brand new diamond watch.

(Cut to: CARLOS, handing GABRIELLE an open box as he walks by, talking business on his cell phone. GABRIELLE smiles when CARLOS hands her the box, but the smile fades as CARLOS walks off, still talking on his phone.

End of Flashback. Resume to present.)

NARRATOR: Had I looked closer , I've seen that Gabrielle was a drowning woman, desperately in search of a life raft. Luckily for her, she found one.

(GABRIELLE sits up, smiling as she leans towards JOHN as they kiss.)

NARRATOR: Of course, Gabrielle only saw her young gardener as a way to infuse her life with a little excitement. But now, she was about to discover just how exciting her life could get.

(Cut to: CARLOS in his car, pulling in the driveway. We flash between scenes of GABRIELLE kissing JOHN, giggling as CARLOS gets out, holding a briefcase in his hand. As he slams the door, GABRIELLE stops, hearing a noise. She peeks out the window and sees CARLOS walking along the path towards the house.)

GABRIELLE: Damn it!?(Grabs John's arm, pulling him out of the bathroom) Come on.

JOHN: Whoa!

(GABRIELLE and JOHN hurry down the stairs, slipping and sliding as they go.)

GABRIELLE: Come on, come on, hurry! Let's go, let's go!

(They run into the living room. GABRIELLE grabs the strewn clothes on the floor, shoving them at JOHN.)

JOHN: Where're the rest of my clothes?

(CARLOS stops at the bottom of the path, opening the letterbox to get the mail.)

GABRIELLE: I'll find them, just get out!

JOHN: Where?

(GABRIELLE looks around, sees the back windows facing the side garden. She points at the window.)

GABRIELLE: Out the window.

JOHN: What?

GABRIELLE: Go, go!

(As JOHN tries to get out the window, GABRIELLE looks at the door, panicked as we cut to CARLOS walking up the steps of the front porch. GABRIELLE pushes JOHN out the window, grabbing his towel as she wraps her hair in the towel JOHN was using. She smiles at CARLOS who walks in.)

GABRIELLE: Hi honey, you're home early!

CARLOS: My meeting got cancelled. (looks at GABRIELLE as he puts down his things on the table.) You just took a shower this morning.

GABRIELLE: I, uh, I just finished a workout .

(Gabrielle's smile fades as she sees John's jeans in the corner of the couch, luckily hidden from Carlos's view. She walks towards CARLOS, covering the jeans with a cushion.)

CARLOS: Mmm. Where's John?

GABRIELLE: John?

CARLOS: Yeah. That's his truck out front.

(GABRIELLE is speechless, her mouth moving, but no sound coming out of her mouth.)

NARRATOR: Gabrielle was panicked. She knew if her husband discovered her secret, she would feel the full force of his wrath.

JOHN: Hey Mr. Solis.

(We pan to the open front window, where JOHN is seen, trimming the hedge with his shears. He is wearing his flannel shirt.)

CARLOS: Hey, John, did you take care of that fichus yet?

JOHN: I'll get to it as soon as I've done here.

CARLOS: Alright. We need to talk about the hedges later.

(JOHN flashes GABRIELLE a brief, shy smile as GABRIELLE breathes a sigh of relief.)

NARRATOR: But she was quickly reminded that what Carlos couldn't see, couldn't hurt her.

JOHN: Yeah, sure, no problem.

(The camera pans to the outside view, where we see JOHN, wearing only his flannel shirt and nothing else, as he stands on a stepladder, pretending to trim the hedges. Hehe. Yummy.)

Opening Credits

[OPEN ON:INT. MEYER HOUSE - KITCHEN -- NIGHT]

(We open to look out the kitchen window, where we see the darkened YOUNG house opposite Susan's house. The camera pans to show LYNETTE sitting on the kitchen counter, rubbing her neck with one hand. We then see BREE holding a dishcloth and wiping her hands, her face somber, as GABRIELLE holds a glass of red wine in her hands. SUSAN is sitting at the table. They are all looking at the kitchen table, where, in front of SUSAN, lays the mysterious warning letter found in MARY Alice's belongings. The camera cuts to show a face shot of SUSAN, GABRIELLE, BREE, then LYNETTE. They all look solemn.)

NARRATOR: The peaceful facade of Wisteria Lane had recently been shattered. First by my suicide, and then by the discovery of a note among my belongings that suggested a suspicious reason for my desperate act. My friends gathered to discuss its implications.

SUSAN: (sighs) I think we should give it to Paul.

GABRIELLE: He's still mourning , Susan, he'll probably freak out .

SUSAN: It doesn't matter, she was his wife. He deserves to have all the facts.

BREE: Well, we could do it gently. We could tell him about it over coffee and pastry. (Hands LYNETTE a cup of tea.)

LYNETTE: (sips the tea) That would be fun. Paul, we have proof your wife killed herself over some deep dark secret. Another bear claw?

GABRIELLE: We could always call the police.

LYNETTE: Maybe it's just some sort of sick joke.

BREE: Well if it was a joke, it was in very poor taste.

SUSAN: No, this was serious, I know it was. We gotta find out what was going on.

LYNETTE: (puts the cup of tea down on the counter and slides off to lean against the counter) Let's say we do. There's a chance we're not gonna like what we find.

SUSAN: Well, isn't it worse to be in the dark, imagining she did all these horrible things?

BREE: It's the age-old question, isn't it? (SUSAN looks up at BREE.) How much do we really wanna know about our neighbours?

(SUSAN looks at GABRIELLE, who looks down at the letter. The camera pans to show the threatening letter.)

[FADE TO:EXT. YOUNG HOUSE -- NIGHT --- LATER]

(ZACH stands at the bottom of the emptied pool, looking down into a deep, dark hole that PAUL dug up. He looks back at the dark house, where we cut to PAUL staggering into the garage, carrying a large, heavy chest. It looks like it hasn't been opened for a long time.)

NARRATOR: My friends were right to be concerned. They knew that every family has its secrets. And as my son and husband could've told them, you need to think carefully before digging them up.

[CUT TO: EXT. MEYER HOUSE -- NIGHT --- LATER]

(We see our four housewives walking towards the gate. They say their farewells, as SUSAN walks back into her house. LYNETTE walks along the left path, GABRIELLE walks along the right path and BREE crosses the street all in four different directions.)

NARRATOR: After talking for hours, my friends still hadn't agreed on what to do with the note. So, they decided to talk about it in the morning after a good night's rest. But no one could fall asleep that night. They each kept thinking of my suicide, and how terribly alone I must've felt. You see, lonely was something my friend's understood all too well.

(Cut to: SUSAN, lying awake in her bed as she sighs.)

(Pan to: GABRIELLE, lying alone in her bed, CARLOS' side empty. She looks frustrated, angry and sad.)

(Pan to: LYNETTE, who turns her head to the empty side of the bed. Presumably TOM is on another one of his business trips.)

(Pan to: BREE, who still looks very prim and proper lying in her bed with a proper white, frilly, lacy nightgown. But, it's sleeveless, Sassy. BREE sighs as she looks sideways at the empty side of the bed. We cut to BREE walking down the stairs to the living room, tying the cord of her dressing gown. She stops at the foot of the makeshift bed where REX is lying, back towards the camera.)

REX: (turns around) It's okay, I'm up.

BREE: (smiles) Good. I have a question for you.

REX: (rolls his eyes, and gets up, sitting next to BREE on the side of the bed.) Okay.

BREE: Do you remember when you proposed?

REX: For god's sake.

BREE: We sat on Skyline Drive and drank a bottle of apple wine. And when we finished it, you turned to me and you said, If you marry me, Bree Mason, I promise to love you for the rest of my life. And even though I was engaged to Ty Grant, and even though my father didn't like you, I said yes.

REX: That was a long time ago.

BREE: You're gonna cancel the meeting with that divorce lawyer, and we're gonna find ourselves a marriage counsellor.

REX: Bree, I?

BREE: (looks crestfallen) You promised.

REX: Alright.

BREE: (smiles) Good, I'm gonna go make myself some, uh, warm milk. Would you like something to drink?

REX: Anything but apple wine.

[CUT TO:INT. MEYER HOUSE - KITCHEN -- NIGHT --- LATER]

(SUSAN stands at the kitchen counter, filling a glass filled with water. She takes a sip as she looks out the window. She sees MIKE walking his dog across the road, sighing.)

NARRATOR: Susan awoke that night alone and parched. And as she gazed out her window, she saw the tall drink of water she needed to quench her thirst.

JULIE: Dear Diary, Mike doesn't even know I'm alive.

SUSAN: Shut up.

JULIE: If you wanna date him, you're gonna have to ask him out.

SUSAN: I keep hoping he'll ask me out.

JULIE: How's that going?

SUSAN: Shouldn't you be making brownies for your nerdy friends?

JULIE: I can't find the measuring cup. Have you seen it?

SUSAN: The measuring cup? (flashbacks to dropping the measuring cup in the living room of the BRITT house.)

JULIE: Yeah.

SUSAN: Hm. (flashbacks to SUSAN yelping, the living room on fire, then to the firefighters trying to save the burning house.) Uh, well it's gotta be here somewhere. Just keep looking.

[CUT TO: INT. SOLIS HOUSE - BEDROOM -- NIGHT --- LATER]

(The bedroom door opens, and CARLOS walks in. He goes to the walk-in closet and takes off his suit jacket. Gabrielle's eyes are closed.)

CARLOS: I know you're awake.

GABRIELLE: I know you're a jerk.

CARLOS: Dinner with Tanaka ran long , I'm sorry.

GABRIELLE: (sits up) You know, Carlos, I didn't marry you so I could have dinner by myself 6 nights a week. You know how bored I was today? I came this close to actually cleaning the house.

CARLOS: Don't be that way. I got you a gift.

GABRIELLE: Nope. No, no, no, no. you're not gonna buy your way outta this one.

CARLOS: It's a good gift. (lays on the bed next to her, and tosses the jewellery box next to GABRIELLE.)

GABRIELLE: Is that white gold?

CARLOS: Yeah. Put it on. (kisses Gabrielle's shoulder) And then make love to me.

GABRIELLE: I'm not in the mood. But, we could stay up and talk.

CARLOS: (laughs and gets up, walking to the table at the end of the bed) When a man buys a woman expensive jewellery, there are many things he may want in return. For future reference, conversation ain't one of them.

(GABRIELLE throws the box at him, pissing off. Jerk.)

CARLOS: Hey, that was a joke.

GABRIELLE: Yeah, right. (Throws the bedcovers back and gets up)

CARLOS: (catches hold of her by her arms) What the hell's wrong with you?

GABRIELLE: Let go of me.

CARLOS: You've been acting like a nightmare for a month. What's wrong?

GABRIELLE: Stop.

CARLOS: I can't fix it unless you tell me.

GABRIELLE: (throws her arms free, and sits back on the bed, sighing) It's not exciting anymore, Carlos.

CARLOS: (sighs, sits on the bed next to her) So what am I supposed to do?

GABRIELLE: I don't know. Be the way you used to be, surprise me, take my breath away.

CARLOS: (sighs) Okay. Okay.

[CUT TO: EXT. MEYER HOUSE -- DAY]

(The front door opens, and SUSAN walks out, holding a bag of rubbish. She looks like she literally just rolled out of bed. She stifles a yawn as she opens the rubbish bin at the kerb, stuffing the plastic rubbish bag into it. We see MIKE a little distance away behind her, walking his dog again. He turns at the sound of SUSAN dumping the rubbish.)

MIKE: Hey Susan.

SUSAN: (stops short, eyes wide, not turning around) Mike!

MIKE: What's wrong?

SUSAN: I didn't realize anyone was gonna be out here, I just sorta rolled outta bed.

MIKE: I'm sure you look fine.

SUSAN: Oooh. (fixes herself, then turns around, smiling.)

MIKE: (pulls Bongo back as the dog starts barking at SUSAN, who looks startled) Ooh, Bongo, Bongo! Shh.. Sorry, uh, he scares easy.

SUSAN: No, it's fine, I get it.

MIKE: I didn't mean to disturb you. I'll see you later. (turns around to go)

SUSAN: Do you wanna have dinner with me?

MIKE: (turns back towards SUSAN) Just the two of us?

SUSAN: Heh, well, and Julie. Uh, it's a thing we do when somebody new moves into the neighbourhood, we invite them over for a home-cooked meal. Sort of a tradition.

MIKE: You said you were a lousy cook.

SUSAN: Well. I order takeout.

MIKE: Oh, you invite them over for a home-cooked meal and you order takeout.

SUSAN: Yeah, it's sort of a new tradition. I'm working out the kinks.

MIKE: (chuckles) I'll tell you what. How about I cook? And you guys come over to my place.

SUSAN: Oh. Great.

MIKE: Friday night at six?

SUSAN: I'll be there.

MIKE: Alright.

SUSAN: (laughs, bending down towards Bongo) Bye, Bongo.

(Bongo barks at SUSAN, who jumps back, laughing tentatively. SUSAN runs back into the house, excited. JULIE watches her smiling at her mother's obvious excitement. SUSAN bursts into the kitchen door.)

SUSAN: Julie? Mike Delfino just invited us to dinner Friday night.

JULIE: He did? Cool.

SUSAN: But only I'm going. Because you're gonna come down with something semi-serious that requires bed-rest and fluids. (runs up the stairs as she squeals)

[CUT TO: EXT. BRITT HOUSE -- DAY]

(EDIE and MRS. HUBER are sifting through the burnt-out shell of the house.)

NARRATOR: Julie was glad Susan was rekindling her love life. Of course, she was unaware of her mother's recent track record with fire.

EDIE: It's all gone. Everything my ex-husband's worked for all those years. Gone.

MRS HUBER: Don't worry about clothing, I already started a collection from people in the neighbourhood.

EDIE: (picks up a little burnt pot, and puts it in a bucket) What? I don't wanna wear other people's old crap.

MRS HUBER: Edie, you can be homeless or you can be ungracious . You really can't afford to be both.

EDIE: (picks up a semi-burnt pink bra, and sighs) That reminds me. My insurance cheque still hasn't come yet. Can I stay with you for a few more weeks?

MRS HUBER: Of course. What kind of Christian would I be if I denied shelter to a friend in need? (spots Susan's burnt measuring cup on the ground)Oh look, here's something we can salvage, your measuring cup. We can just scrape off the burnt part and it'll look good as new.

EDIE: That's not my cup. Mine was plastic.

MRS HUBER: Well, how did it get in here?

EDIE: I don't know. Who cares? Now would you put that down and start looking for jewellery? (MRS. HUBER holds onto the burnt glass measuring cup, looking suspicious.)

[CUT TO:INT. DR. GOLDFINE'S OFFICE -- DAY]

NARRATOR: Doctor Albert Goldfine was the most accomplished marriage counsellor in the city. He had dealt with problems ranging from substance abuse, to infidelity, to domestic violence. Yes, Dr. Goldfine thought he had seen it all. And then, he met the Van De Kamp's.

(DR. GOLDFINE is sitting at his desk, writing when he hears a knock at his office door. He walks over to open it. BREE and REX are standing there. BREE is looking sparkly and happy as usual, while REX looks on, incredulously exasperated.)

BREE: Hi, I'm Bree, and this is my husband Rex. And I brought you some homemade pot pourri. (She hands him a packet of pot pourri as she walks past him into the office.)

REX: (pats DR. GOLDFINE on the shoulder) The answer is yes, you're about to make a fortune off us.

(DR. GOLDFINE looks ambushed. Tee-hee.)

[CUT TO:INT. SCAVO CAR -- DAY]

LYNETTE: Boys, guys, I'm begging you, sit in your seats. I'm not gonna tell you again! Buckle up ! I mean it, so help me, I'll-(A police motorcycle drives up behind her, siren sounding) Oh. crap! (She stops the car.)

OFFICER: (the policeman gets off his bike and walks to Lynette's window) License and registration please. (Accepts the documents from LYNETTE) Ma'am, you know why I pulled you over?

LYNETTE: I have a theory.

OFFICER: Your kids are jumping up and down; they should be sitting, wearing a seatbelt.

LYNETTE: I yelled at them. They never listen to me, it's very frustrating.

OFFICER: Well, you're gonna hafta find a way to control them. After all, that's your job. (Walks off back to his motorbike)

NARRATOR: Though he's been a policeman for 6 years, Officer Hayes had never found himself in a truly dangerous situation. Then again, he had never before told a woman how to raise her children.

(LYNETTE sits with her hands on the wheel of her car, looking pissed.)

LYNETTE: (gets out of her car, slamming the door) You saying I'm a bad mother?

OFFICER: Ma'am, you need to get back in your car please.

LYNETTE: (slowly walks towards the policeman) I have no help, my husband's always away on business.

OFFICER: I'm gonna hafta ask you to step back now. (slowly moves his hands towards his weapon)

LYNETTE: My babysitter joined the witness relocation program. I haven't slept through the night in 6 years.

OFFICER: Ma'am..?

LYNETTE: (gets right in the policeman's face) And for you to stand there, and judge me.

OFFICER: Okay. I'm not gonna give you a ticket. I'm just gonna let you off with a warning.

LYNETTE: I accept your apology. (takes her license and registration from his hands and gets back in her car.)

OFFICER: Buckle up!

[CUT TO: EXT. ROWLAND HOUSE -- DAY]

(We see someone (John's mum) come out the front door, get in their car and drive off. As soon as the car drives down the road, a car door opens, and a pair of leopard-print high-heels steps out of the car. It's GABRIELLE, who looks around, a little shiftily. She walks, struts across the street. A doorbell is heard, and JOHN opens the door to GABRIELLE.)

JOHN: (smiles) Mrs. Solis!

GABRIELLE: Hello Jonathan.

(Cut to: JOHN and GABRIELLE walk into his room. JOHN closes the door behind them.)

JOHN: Well, this is my room. Sorry about the mess.

GABRIELLE: Oh, well, don't... (Hesitates as she sees his messy room) worry about it.

JOHN: You just missed my mom. On Friday she coaches my little sister's soccer team.

GABRIELLE: (takes a half-eaten sandwich on a plate off John's bed, putting it on his desk) Oh yes, I heard that. Uh, John, we need to talk about what happened the other day.

JOHN: Mr. Solis isn't starting to catch on, is he?

GABRIELLE: (sits on the edge of his bed) No, no, he doesn't have a clue, God love him. It's just, I was thinking, that when you come over to garden, you might actually have to garden.

JOHN: Great, you're breaking up with me . In my own bedroom.

GABRIELLE: No, no, no, I'm not dumping you. Lately, you've been the only thing keeping me going. It's just, we can't do it at my house anymore.

JOHN: Oh, so then, where do you wanna do it?

GABRIELLE: Well, uh, what time does your mom get back from soccer practice?

JOHN: (smiles a little shyly) Mrs. Solis.

GABRIELLE: You better hurry, we don't have a lot of time.

(JOHN rips his shirt off as he walks over to GABRIELLE, laying her down on the bed as he kisses her neck. GABRIELLE catches sight of a picture of a younger JOHN playing baseball next to the bed. She flips the photo down out of sight, then smiles.)

[CUT TO: INT. DR. GOLDFINE'S OFFICE -- DAY]

(The camera opens on a recording voice-recorder as we hear BREE talking in the Van De Kamp's therapy session.)

BREE: And so, there's just the four of us. My oldest son Andrew is 16, Danielle is 15, and? (looks down as she reaches into her purse.)

DR GOLDFINE: (hastily) I don't need to see pictures. Bree, you've spent most of the hour engaging in small talk.

BREE: (smiles serenely) Oh, have I?

(REX flashes BREE a sideways glance.)

DR GOLDFINE: Yes. Rex has been very vocal about his issues. Don't you want to discuss your feelings about your marriage?

BREE: (shifts uncomfortably, smoothing her hair) Um, Doc, um?

REX: This is the thing you need to know about Bree. She doesn't like to talk about her feelings. To be honest, it's hard to know if she has any. (BREE looks at REX incredulously.) Does she feel anger, rage, ecstasy? Who knows? She's always pleasant. And I can't tell you how annoying that is. (BREE catches sight of a loose button on DR. GOLDFINE's jacket. She stares at it, lost in thought as REX's words start sounding distorted as she loses concentration in the conversation) Whatever she feels is so far below the surface that.. that no one can see? she uses all those domestic things.

(BREE keeps staring at DR. GOLDFINE fiddling with his loose button as she unconsciously reaches down into her bag, taking out a handy sewing kit.)

DR GOLDFINE: Bree? Bree.

BREE: What? I-I'm sorry.

DR GOLDFINE: Would you like to respond to what Rex just said?

BREE: Oh, I. (looks lost for words)

DR GOLDFINE: Is there some truth there? Do you use housework as a way to disengage emotionally?

BREE: Of course not. (Drops the sewing kit back in her bag quickly. Tee-hee. Gotta love the woman.)

[CUT TO: INT. ROWLAND HOUSE - JOHN'S BEDROOM -- DAY --- LATER]

(JOHN is laying back in his bed, wearing just his boxers, sighing with contentment. GABRIELLE is sitting at the edge of his bed, putting her earrings back on.)

JOHN: This is great. I got tons of homework tonight. It's so much easier to concentrate after sex.

GABRIELLE: I'm glad I could help. Education is very important.

JOHN: Oh, I got something for you. I was gonna give it to you the next time I mowed your lawn, but since you're here? (Gets a single rose from his shelf.)

GABRIELLE: Oh, it's a rose.

JOHN: It's not just any rose. Look at all the petals . There's no flaw s, it' perfect.

GABRIELLE: Oh, John.

JOHN: Just like you.

NARRATOR: The truth hit her like a thunderbolt.

JOHN: I spent days looking for this one. Finally found it.

NARRATOR: For John, this was no longer a meaningless little affair. Gabrielle could now clearly see he was falling in love with her.

GABRIELLE: (smiles at him) It's just beautiful. I, uh, I gotta go.

JOHN: Bye.

[CUT TO: EXT. DELFINO HOUSE -- DAY --- LATER]

(MIKE is getting bags of groceries out of his truck, nudging the door shut. SUSAN runs across his lawn towards him.)

SUSAN: Hey you. What're we having? (Takes a bag of groceries from him)

MIKE: I talked to Julie, thanks, and she suggested rib-eye steaks. She said it's your favourite.

SUSAN: Oh yeah, I love my steak.

(A silver sports car, maybe Porsche?, drives up and stops at the bottom of Mike's driveway. EDIE toots the horn. )

EDIE: Hi Mike. Susan.

(MIKE walks back down the driveway towards the car.)

SUSAN: Edie. (sighs as she walks down to join MIKE.)

MIKE: Hey, I'm sorry about your house. How you holding up?

EDIE: Alright, I guess. (opens the car door and steps out.) Oh, is somebody having a party?

MIKE: No, Susan's just throwing me one of her traditional welcome-to-the-neighbourhood dinners. Only I'm cooking. And having it at my house.

EDIE: (laughs) Traditional. Hm. I didn't get one.

SUSAN: Oh, it's sort of a new tradition.

MIKE: Well, it won't be anything fancy, just a little home cooking.

EDIE: Mmm, that sounds so good.

NARRATOR: Susan suddenly had an awful feeling in the pit of her stomach.

EDIE: I've been having nothing but fast food lately. (Rummages through Mike's grocery bags, taking out a grape and eating it seductively, staring at MIKE.)

NARRATOR: As if she was watching an accident in slow motion. She knew it would happen, but was powerless to stop it.

(MIKE turns around to look at SUSAN, cocking his head as if to ask if it's okay.)

SUSAN: Edie, would you like to join us for dinner?

EDIE: Oh that's so sweet. No, I don't wanna intrude. Three's a crowd.

MIKE: No, it's not like that. I mean, Susan's bringing Julie.

SUSAN: It's not like that. The more the merrier .

EDIE: Well, this'll be fun.

MIKE: Alright. Tomorrow night. We'll eat at six.

EDIE: Great. Oh, and Susan.

SUSAN: Yeah.

EDIE: This'll make up for the dinner that you never threw me.