ABUSED. THIS IS THE ONLY SAVIOUR, THE ONLY REDEEMER, THE ONLY ONE

THAT COULD SO LOVE SINNERS, AS TO WASH THEM FROM THEIR SINS IN HIS



OWN MOST PRECIOUS BLOOD; BUT YOU HAVE NO PART NOR LOT IN THIS

JESUS: YOU HAVE PUT HIM FROM YOU; YOU HAVE SAID IN YOUR HEART, Let



Him go, if He will. NOW, THEREFORE, YOU ARE SEVERED FROM HIM; YOU

HAVE SEVERED YOURSELF FROM HIM: BEHOLD THEN HIS GOODNESS, BUT



YOURSELF TO BE NO PARTAKER OF IT. Oh! thought I, what have I lost,

what have I parted with! What has disinherited my poor soul! Oh!



'tis sad to be destroyed by the grace and mercy of God; to have the

Lamb, the Saviour, turn lion and destroyer. Rev. vi. I also



trembled, as I have said, at the sight of the saints of God,

especially at those that greatly loved Him, and that made it their



business to walk continually" target="_blank" title="ad.不断地，频繁地">continually with Him in this world; for they did,

both in their words, their carriages, and all their expressions of



tenderness and fear to sin against their precious Saviour, condemn,

lay guilt upon, and also add continualaffliction and shame upon my



soul. THE DREAD OF THEM WAS UPON ME, AND I TREMBLED AT GOD'S

SAMUELS. 1 Sam. xvi. 4.



184. Now also the tempter began afresh to mock my soul another

way, saying, THAT CHRIST INDEED DID PITY MY CASE, AND WAS SORRY FOR



MY LOSS; BUT FORASMUCH AS I HAD SINNED AND TRANSGRESSED AS I HAD

DONE, HE COULD BY NO MEANS HELP ME, NOR SAVE ME FROM WHAT I FEARED:



FOR MY SIN WAS NOT OF THE NATURE OF THEIRS, FOR WHOM HE BLED AND

DIED; NEITHER WAS IT COUNTED WITH THOSE THAT WERE LAID TO HIS



CHARGE, WHEN HE HANGED ON A TREE: THEREFORE, UNLESS HE SHOULD COME

DOWN FROM HEAVEN, AND DIE ANEW FOR THIS SIN, THOUGH INDEED HE DID



GREATLY PITY ME, YET I COULD HAVE NO BENEFIT OF HIM. These things

may seem ridiculous to others, even as ridiculous as they were in



themselves, but to me they were most tormenting cogitations: every

one of them augmented my misery, that Jesus Christ should have so



much love as to pity me, when yet He could not help me; nor did I

think that the reason why He could not help me, was, because His



merits were weak, or His grace and salvation spent on others

already, but because His faithfulness to His threatening, would not



let Him extend His mercy to me. Besides, I thought, as I have

already hinted, that my sin was not within the bounds of that



pardon, that was wrapped up in a promise; and if not, then I knew

assuredly, that it was more easy for heaven and earth to pass away,



than for me to have eternal life. So that the ground of all these

fears of mine did arise from a steadfastbelief I had of the



stability of the holy word of God, and also from my being

misinformed of the nature of my sin.



185. But oh! how this would add to my affliction, to conceit that

I should be guilty of such a sin, for which He did not die. These



thoughts would so confound me, and imprison me, and tie me up from

faith, that I knew not what to do. But oh! thought I, that He



would come down again! Oh! that the work of man's redemption was

yet to be done by Christ! how would I pray Him and entreat Him to



count and reckon this sin among the rest for which He died! But

this scripture would strike me down as dead; CHRIST BEING RAISED



FROM THE DEAD, DIETH NO MORE; DEATH HATH NO MORE DOMINION OVER HIM.

Rom. vi. 9.



186. Thus, by the strange and unusual assaults of the tempter, my

soul was like a broken vessel, driven as with the winds, and tossed



sometimes headlong into despair; sometimes upon the covenant of

works, and sometimes to wish that the new covenant, and the



conditions thereof, might so far forth, as I thought myself

concerned, be turned another way, and changed, BUT IN ALL THESE, I



WAS AS THOSE THAT JOSTLE AGAINST THE ROCKS; MORE BROKEN, SCATTERED

AND RENT. Oh! the un-thought-of imaginations, frights, fears, and



terrors, that are affected by a thoroughapplication of guilt

yielding to desperation! THIS IS THE MAN THAT HATH HIS DWELLING



AMONG THE TOMBS WITH THE DEAD; THAT IS ALWAYS CRYING OUT, AND

CUTTING HIMSELF WITH STONES. Mark v. 1, 2, 3. But, I say, all in



vain; desperation will not comfort him, the old covenant will not

save him: nay, heaven and earth shall pass away, before one jot or



tittle of the word and law of grace will fail or be removed. This

I saw, this I felt, and under this I groaned; yet this advantage I



got thereby, namely, a farther confirmation of the certainty of the

way of salvation; and that the scriptures were the word of God.



Oh! I cannot now express what then I saw and felt of the steadiness

• differ [´difə] vi.不同；有差别 (初中英语单词)


• christ [kraist] n.基督 int.天啊! (初中英语单词)


• profession [prə´feʃən] n.职业；声明；表白 (初中英语单词)


• venture [´ventʃə] n.投机 v.冒险；敢于 (初中英语单词)


• privilege [´privilidʒ] n.特权 vt.给….特权 (初中英语单词)


• stress [stres] n.强调；压力 vt.强调 (初中英语单词)


• thereupon [,ðeərə´pɔn] ad.因此；于是 (初中英语单词)


• altogether [,ɔ:ltə´geðə] ad.完全；总而言之 (初中英语单词)


• relate [ri´leit] v.阐明；使联系；涉及 (初中英语单词)


• ashamed [ə´ʃeimd] a.惭愧；不好意思 (初中英语单词)


• wretched [´retʃid] a.可怜的；倒霉的 (初中英语单词)


• strongly [´strɔŋli] ad.强烈地；强有力地 (初中英语单词)


• therefore [´ðeəfɔ:] ad.&conj.因此；所以 (初中英语单词)


• thence [ðens] ad.从那里；因此 (初中英语单词)


• desperate [´despərit] a.拼死的；绝望的 (初中英语单词)


• prophet [´prɔfit] n.预言家；先知；提倡者 (初中英语单词)


• gracious [´greiʃəs] a.和蔼可亲的；任慈的 (初中英语单词)


• conscience [´kɔnʃəns] n.良心；道德心 (初中英语单词)


• goodness [´gudnis] n.优良；美德；精华 (初中英语单词)


• misery [´mizəri] n.痛苦；悲惨；穷困 (初中英语单词)


• eternal [i´tə:nəl] a.永远的；永恒的 (初中英语单词)


• belief [bi´li:f] n.相信；信仰，信条 (初中英语单词)


• guilty [´gilti] a.有罪的；心虚的 (初中英语单词)


• reckon [´rekən] v.计算；认为；估计 (初中英语单词)


• unusual [ʌn´ju:ʒuəl] a.不平常的；异常的 (初中英语单词)


• vessel [´vesəl] n.容器；船；脉管 (初中英语单词)


• driven [´driv(ə)n] drive 的过去分词 (初中英语单词)


• despair [di´speə] vi.&n.绝望 (初中英语单词)


• application [,æpli´keiʃən] n.申请；申请书；应用 (初中英语单词)


• advantage [əd´vɑ:ntidʒ] n.优势；利益 (初中英语单词)


• thereby [´ðeəbai] ad.因此，由此 (初中英语单词)


• wherein [weər´in] ad.那里面 (高中英语单词)


• bellow [´beləu] v.吼叫；轰鸣 (高中英语单词)


• notwithstanding [,nɔtwiθ´stændiŋ] prep.&conj.虽然；还是 (高中英语单词)


• salvation [sæl´veiʃən] n.救助；拯救 (高中英语单词)


• concerning [kən´sə:niŋ] prep.关于 (高中英语单词)


• seeing [si:iŋ] see的现在分词 n.视觉 (高中英语单词)


• acceptance [ək´septəns] n.接受；承认 (高中英语单词)


• israel [´izreiəl] n.以色列 (高中英语单词)


• solomon [´sɔləmən] n.所罗门 (高中英语单词)


• saying [´seiŋ, ´sei-iŋ] n.言语；言论；格言 (高中英语单词)


• combat [´kɔmbæt] v.&n.斗争；战斗；争斗 (高中英语单词)


• torment [´tɔ:ment] vt.(使)痛苦，折磨 (高中英语单词)


• remembrance [ri´membrəns] n.记忆(力)；回忆 (高中英语单词)


• loving [´lʌviŋ] a.爱的，有爱情的 (高中英语单词)


• continually [kən´tinjuəli] ad.不断地，频繁地 (高中英语单词)


• continual [kən´tinjuəl] a.不断的，频繁的 (高中英语单词)


• theirs [ðeəz] pron.他们的 (高中英语单词)


• ridiculous [ri´dikjuləs] a.荒谬的；可笑的 (高中英语单词)


• conceit [kən´si:t] n.自负；骄傲自满 (高中英语单词)


• confound [kən´faund] v.混淆；使惊惶 (高中英语单词)


• imprison [im´prizən] vt.监禁，下狱 (高中英语单词)


• dominion [də´miniən] n.主权；统治权；领地 (高中英语单词)


• headlong [´hedlɔŋ] ad.&a.轻率地(的) (高中英语单词)


• thorough [´θʌrə] a.彻底的；详尽的 (高中英语单词)


• namely [´neimli] ad.即，也就是 (高中英语单词)


• certainty [´sə:tənti] n.确实(性)；确信 (高中英语单词)


• withal [wi´ðɔ:l] ad.加之；同样；然而 (英语四级单词)


• desperation [,despə´reiʃən] n.铤而走险，拼命 (英语四级单词)


• whence [wens] ad.从何处；从那里 (英语四级单词)


• verily [´verili] ad.真实的；肯定地 (英语四级单词)


• blessed [´blesid] a.享福的；神圣的 (英语四级单词)


• savour [´seivə] n.味道；风味 v.尝到 (英语四级单词)


• wherefore [´weəfɔ:] ad.为什么；因此 (英语四级单词)


• flaming [´fleimiŋ] a.熊熊燃烧的；热情的 (英语四级单词)


• displeasure [dis´pleʒə] n.不高兴，不快，生气 (英语四级单词)


• scripture [´skriptʃə] n.手稿；文件；经典 (英语四级单词)


• covenant [´kʌvənənt] n.盟约，契约 v.订盟约 (英语四级单词)


• asunder [ə´sʌndə] a.分开地；零散地 (英语四级单词)


• whereby [weə´bai] ad.凭什么；靠那个 (英语四级单词)


• saviour [´seiviə] n.救星；救助者 (英语四级单词)


• gentleness [´dʒentlnis] n.温和，温柔 (英语四级单词)


• entreat [in´tri:t] vt.恳求，恳请 (英语四级单词)


• jostle [´dʒɔsəl] v.&n.推，撞，挤(人) (英语四级单词)


• confirmation [,kɔnfə´meiʃən] n.证实；证据；确认 (英语四级单词)


• speaking [´spi:kiŋ] n.说话 a.发言的 (英语六级单词)


• forsaken [fə´seik] forsake的过去分词 (英语六级单词)


• dispensation [,dispen´seiʃən] n.分配；施与 (英语六级单词)


• mistrust [mis´trʌst] v.&n.不信任；怀疑 (英语六级单词)


• meekness [´mi:knis] n.温顺；卑恭屈节 (英语六级单词)


• affliction [ə´flikʃən] n.痛苦，苦恼；折磨 (英语六级单词)


• steadfast [´stedfɑ:st, -fæst] a.坚定的，不动摇的 (英语六级单词)


• affected [ə´fektid] a.做作的；假装的 (英语六级单词)