Ha!... but just you be off
elsewhere to roast younger folk than us
with your lightning.
CHORUS (singing)
We
forbid the gods, the sons of Zeus, to pass through our city and
the mortals to send them the smoke of their sacrifices by this road.
PITHETAERUS
It's odd that the
messenger we sent to the mortals has never
returned.
(The HERALD enters, wearing a golden
garland on his head.)
HERALD
Oh!
blessed Pithetaerus, very wise, very
illustrious, very
gracious,
thrice happy, very...Come,
prompt me, somebody, do
PITHETAERUS
Get to your story!
HERALD
All peoples are filled with
admiration for your
wisdom, and they
award you this golden crown.
PITHETAERUS
I accept it. But tell me, why do the people admire me?
HERALD
Oh you, who have founded so
illustrious a city in the air, you
know not in what
esteem men hold you and how many there are who burn
with desire to dwell in it. Before your city was built, all men had
a mania for Sparta; long hair and fasting were held in honour, men
went dirty like Socrates and carried staves. Now all is changed.
Firstly, as soon as it's dawn, they all spring out of bed together
to go and seek their food, the same as you do; then they fly off
towards the notices and finally
devour the decrees. The bird-madness
is so clear that many
actually bear the names of birds. There is a
halting victualler, who styles himself the
partridge; Menippus calls
himself the
swallow; Opuntius the one-eyed crow; Philocles the lark;
Theogenes the fox-goose; Lycurgus the ibis; Chaerephon the bat;
Syracosius the magpie; Midias the quail; indeed he looks like a
quail that has been hit hard on the head. Out of love for the birds
they repeat all the songs which concern the
swallow, the teal, the
goose or the
pigeon; in each verse you see wings, or at all events a
few feathers. This is what is
happening down there. Finally, there are
more than ten thousand folk who are coming here from earth to ask
you for feathers and
hooked claws; so, mind you supply yourself with
wings for the immigrants.
PITHETAERUS
Ah! by Zeus, there's no time for idling. (To some slaves) Go as
quick as possible and fill every
hamper, every basket you can find
with wings. Manes will bring them to me outside the walls, where I
will
welcome those who present themselves.
CHORUS (Singing)
This town will soon be inhabited by a crowd of men. Fortune
favours us alone and thus they have fallen in love with our city.
PITHETAERUS (to the slave MANES, who brings in a basket full of
wings)
Come, hurry up and bring them along.
CHORUS (singing)
Will not man find here everything that can please him-
wisdom,
love, the
divine Graces, the sweet face of gentle peace?
PITHETAERUS (as MANES Comes in with another basket)
Oh! you lazy servant! won't you hurry yourself?
CHORUS (singing)
Let a basket of wings be brought
speedily. Come, beat him as I do,
and put some life into him; he is as lazy as an ass.
PITHETAERUS
Aye, Manes is a great craven.
CHORUS (singing)
Begin by putting this heap of wings in order; divide them in three
parts according to the birds from whom they came; the singing, the
prophetic and the aquatic birds; then you must take care to distribute
them to the men according to their character.
PITHETAERUS (to MANES, who is bringing in another basket)
Oh! by the kestrels! I can keep my hands off you no longer; you
are too slow and lazy altogether.
(He hits MANES, who runs away. A young PARRICIDE enters.)
PARRICIDE (singing)
Oh! might I but become an eagle, who soars in the skies! Oh! might
I fly above the azure waves of the
barren sea!
PITHETAERUS
Ha! it would seem the news was true; I hear someone coming who
talks of wings.
PARRICIDE
Nothing is more
charming than to fly; I am bird-mad and fly
towards you, for I want to live with you and to obey your laws.
PITHETAERUS
Which laws? The birds have many laws.
PARRICIDE
All of them; but the one that pleases me most is that among the
birds it is considered a fine thing to peck and strangle one's father.
PITHETAERUS
Yes, by Zeus! according to us, he who dares to strike his
father, while still a chick, is a brave fellow.
PARRICIDE
And
therefore I want to dwell here, for I want to strangle my
father and
inherit his wealth.
PITHETAERUS
But we have also an ancient law written in the code of the storks,
which runs thus, "When the stork father has reared his young and has
taught them to fly, the young must in their turn support the father."
PARRICIDE (petulantly)
It's hardly worth while coming all this distance to be compelled
to keep my father!
PITHETAERUS
No, no, young friend, since you have come to us with such
willingness, I am going to give you these black wings, as though you
were an
orphan bird;
furthermore, some good advice, that I received
myself in
infancy. Don't strike your father, but take these wings in
one hand and these spurs in the other; imagine you have a cock's crest
on your head and go and mount guard and fight; live on your pay and
respect your father's life. You're a
gallant fellow! Very well,
then! Fly to Thrace and fight.
PARRICIDE
By Bacchus! You're right; I will follow your counsel.
PITHETAERUS
It's
actingwisely, by Zeus.
(The PARRICIDE departs, and the dithyrambic poet CINESIAS
arrives.)
CINESIAS (singing)
"On my light pinions I soar off to Olympus; in its capricious
flight my Muse flutters along the thousand paths of
poetry in turn..."
PITHETAERUS
This is a fellow will need a whole shipload of wings.
CINESIAS (singing)
"...and being
fearless and
vigorous, it is seeking fresh outlet."
PITHETAERUS
Welcome, Cinesias, you lime-wood man! Why have you come here
twisting your game leg in circles?
CINESIAS (singing)
"I want to become a bird, a tuneful nightingale."
PITHETAERUS
Enough of that sort of ditty. Tell me what you want.
CINESIAS
Give me wings and I will fly into the topmost airs to gather fresh
songs in the clouds, in the midst of the vapours and the
fleecy snow.
PITHETAERUS
Gather songs in the clouds?
CINESIAS
'Tis on them the whole of our latter-day art depends. The most
brilliant dithyrambs are those that flap their wings in empty space
and are clothed in mist and dense
obscurity. To
appreciate this,
just listen.
PITHETAERUS
Oh! no, no, no!
CINESIAS
By Hermes! but indeed you shall. (He sings.) "I shall travel
through thine
ethereal empire like a
winged bird, who cleaveth space
with his long neck..."
PITHETAERUS
Stop! Way enough!
CINESIAS
"...as I soar over the seas, carried by the
breath of the
winds..."
PITHETAERUS
By Zeus! I'll cut your
breath short.
(He picks up a pair of wings and begins
trying to stop CINESIAS'
mouth with them.)
CINESIAS (running away)
"...now rushing along the tracks of Notus, now nearing Boreas
across the
infinite wastes of the ether." Ah! old man, that's a pretty
and clever idea truly!
PITHETAERUS
What! are you not
delighted to be cleaving the air?
CINESIAS
To treat a dithyrambic poet, for whom the tribes
dispute with each
other, in this style!
PITHETAERUS
Will you stay with us and form a
chorus of
winged birds as slender
as Leotrophides for the Cecropid tribe?
CINESIAS
You are making game of me, that's clear; but know that I shall
never leave you in peace if I do not have wings
wherewith to
traverse the air.
(CINESIAS departs and an INFORMER arrives.)
INFORMER
What are these birds with downy feathers, who look so pitiable
to me? Tell me, oh
swallow with the long dappled wings.
PITHETAERUS
Oh! it's a regular
invasion that threatens us. Here comes
another one, humming along.
INFORMER
Swallow with the long dappled wings, once more I
summon you.
PITHETAERUS
It's his cloak I believe he's addressing; it stands in great
need of the
swallows' return.
INFORMER
Where is he who gives out wings to all comers?
PITHETAERUS
Here I am, but you must tell me for what purpose you want them.
INFORMER
Ask no questions. I want wings, and wings I must have.
PITHETAERUS
Do you want to fly straight to Pellene?
INFORMER
I? Why, I am an accuser of the islands, an informer...
PITHETAERUS
A fine trade, truly!
INFORMER
...a hatcher of lawsuits. Hence I have great need of wings to
prowl round the cities and drag them before justice.
PITHETAERUS
Would you do this better if you had wings?
INFORMER
No, but I should no longer fear the pirates; I should return
with the cranes, loaded with a supply of lawsuits by way of ballast.
PITHETAERUS
So it seems,
despite all your
youthfulvigour, you make it your