I saw the Duchess of Milan's gown that they praise so.
Hero. O, that exceeds, they say.
Marg. By my troth, 's but a nightgown in respect of yours--
cloth-o'-gold and cuts, and lac'd with silver, set with pearls
down sleeves, side-sleeves, and skirts, round underborne with
a blush tinsel. But for a fine,
quaint,
graceful, and excellent
fashion, yours is worth ten on't.
Hero. God give me joy to wear it! for my heart is
exceeding heavy.
Marg. 'Twill be heavier soon by the weight of a man.
Hero. Fie upon thee! art not ashamed?
Marg. Of what, lady? of
speaking honourably? Is not marriage
honourable in a
beggar? Is not your lord
honourable without
marriage? I think you would have me say, 'saving your reverence,
a husband.' An bad thinking do not wrest true
speaking, I'll
offend nobody. Is there any harm in 'the heavier for a husband'?
None, I think, an it be the right husband and the right wife.
Otherwise 'tis light, and not heavy. Ask my Lady Beatrice else.
Here she comes.
Enter Beatrice.
Hero. Good
morrow, coz.
Beat. Good
morrow, sweet Hero.
Hero. Why, how now? Do you speak in the sick tune?
Beat. I am out of all other tune,
methinks.
Marg. Clap's into 'Light o' love.' That goes without a burden. Do
you sing it, and I'll dance it.
Beat. Yea, 'Light o' love' with your heels! then, if your husband
have stables enough, you'll see he shall lack no barnes.
Marg. O illegitimate construction! I scorn that with my heels.
Beat. 'Tis almost five o'clock, cousin; 'tis time you were ready.
By my troth, I am
exceeding ill. Hey-ho!
Marg. For a hawk, a horse, or a husband?
Beat. For the letter that begins them all, H.
Marg. Well, an you be not turn'd Turk, there's no more sailing by
the star.
Beat. What means the fool, trow?
Marg. Nothing I; but God send every one their heart's desire!
Hero. These gloves the Count sent me, they are an excellent
perfume.
Beat. I am stuff'd, cousin; I cannot smell.
Marg. A maid, and stuff'd! There's
goodly catching of cold.
Beat. O, God help me! God help me! How long have you profess'd
apprehension?
Marg. Ever since you left it. Doth not my wit become me rarely?
Beat. It is not seen enough. You should wear it in your cap. By my
troth, I am sick.
Marg. Get you some of this distill'd carduus benedictus and lay it
to your heart. It is the only thing for a qualm.
Hero. There thou prick'st her with a
thistle.
Beat. Benedictus? why benedictus? You have some moral in this
'benedictus.'
Marg. Moral? No, by my troth, I have no moral meaning; I meant
plain holy
thistle. You may think
perchance that I think you are
in love. Nay, by'r lady, I am not such a fool to think what I
list; nor I list not to think what I can; nor indeed I cannot
think, if I would think my heart out of thinking, that you are in
love, or that you will be in love, or that you can be in love.
Yet Benedick was such another, and now is he become a man. He
swore he would never marry; and yet now in
despite of his heart
he eats his meat without grudging; and how you may be converted I
know not, but
methinks you look with your eyes as other women do.
Beat. What pace is this that thy tongue keeps?
Marg. Not a false gallop.
Enter Ursula.
Urs. Madam,
withdraw. The Prince, the Count, Signior Benedick, Don
John, and all the gallants of the town are come to fetch you to
church.
Hero. Help to dress me, good coz, good Meg, good Ursula.
[Exeunt.]
Scene V.
The hall in Leonato's house.
Enter Leonato and the Constable [Dogberry] and the
Headborough [verges].
Leon. What would you with me, honest neighbour?
Dog. Marry, sir, I would have some confidence with you that decerns
you nearly.
Leon. Brief, I pray you; for you see it is a busy time with me.
Dog. Marry, this it is, sir.
Verg. Yes, in truth it is, sir.
Leon. What is it, my good friends?
Dog. Goodman Verges, sir, speaks a little off the matter--an old
man, sir, and his wits are not so blunt as, God help, I would
desire they were; but, in faith, honest as the skin between his
brows.
Verg. Yes, I thank God I am as honest as any man living that is an
old man and no honester than I.
Dog. Comparisons are odorous. Palabras, neighbour Verges.
Leon. Neighbours, you are
tedious.
Dog. It pleases your
worship to say so, but we are the poor Duke's
officers; but truly, for mine own part, if I were as
tedious as a
king, I could find in my heart to
bestow it all of your
worship.
Leon. All thy
tediousness on me, ah?
Dog. Yea, in 'twere a thousand pound more than 'tis; for I hear as
good
exclamation on your
worship as of any man in the city; and
though I be but a poor man, I am glad to hear it.
Verg. And so am I.
Leon. I would fain know what you have to say.
Verg. Marry, sir, our watch to-night, excepting your
worship's
presence, ha' ta'en a couple of as
arrant knaves as any in
Messina.
Dog. A good old man, sir; he will be talking. As they say, 'When
the age is in, the wit is out.' God help us! it is a world to
see! Well said, i' faith, neighbour Verges. Well, God's a good
man. An two men ride of a horse, one must ride behind. An honest
soul, i' faith, sir, by my troth he is, as ever broke bread; but
God is to be
worshipp'd; all men are not alike, alas, good
neighbour!
Leon. Indeed, neighbour, he comes too short of you.
Dog. Gifts that God gives.
Leon. I must leave you.
Dog. One word, sir. Our watch, sir, have indeed comprehended two
aspicious persons, and we would have them this morning examined
before your
worship.
Leon. Take their
examination yourself and bring it me. I am now in
great haste, as it may appear unto you.
Dog. It shall be suffigance.
Leon. Drink some wine ere you go. Fare you well.
[Enter a Messenger.]
Mess. My lord, they stay for you to give your daughter to her
husband.
Leon. I'll wait upon them. I am ready.
[Exeunt Leonato and Messenger.]
Dog. Go, good
partner, go get you to Francis Seacoal; bid him bring
his pen and inkhorn to the jail. We are now to
examination these
men.
Verg. And we must do it wisely.
Dog. We will spare for no wit, I w
arrant you. Here's that shall
drive some of them to a non-come. Only get the
learnedwriter to
set down our excommunication, and meet me at the jail.
[Exeunt.]
ACT IV. Scene I.
A church.
Enter Don Pedro, [John the] Bastard, Leonato, Friar [Francis],
Claudio, Benedick, Hero, Beatrice, [and Attendants].
Leon. Come, Friar Francis, be brief. Only to the plain form of
marriage, and you shall
recount their particular duties
afterwards.
Friar. You come
hither, my lord, to marry this lady?
Claud. No.
Leon. To be married to her. Friar, you come to marry her.
Friar. Lady, you come
hither to be married to this count?
Hero. I do.
Friar. If either of you know any
inwardimpediment why you should
not be conjoined, I
charge you on your souls to utter it.
Claud. Know you any, Hero?
Hero. None, my lord.
Friar. Know you any, Count?
Leon. I dare make his answer--none.
Claud. O, what men dare do! what men may do! what men daily do, not
knowing what they do!
Bene. How now? interjections? Why then, some be of laughing, as,
ah, ha, he!
Claud. Stand thee by, friar. Father, by your leave:
Will you with free and unconstrained soul
Give me this maid your daughter?
Leon. As
freely, son, as God did give her me.
Claud. And what have I to give you back whose worth
May counterpoise this rich and precious gift?
Pedro. Nothing, unless you render her again.
Claud. Sweet Prince, you learn me noble thankfulness.
There, Leonato, take her back again.
Give not this
rotten orange to your friend.
She's but the sign and
semblance of her honour.
Behold how like a maid she blushes here!
O, what authority and show of truth
Can
cunning sin cover itself withal!
Comes not that blood as
modest evidence
To
witness simple
virtue, Would you not swear,
All you that see her, that she were a maid
By these
exterior shows? But she is none:
She knows the heat of a
luxurious bed;
Her blush is guiltiness, not
modesty.
Leon. What do you mean, my lord?
Claud. Not to be married,
Not to knit my soul to an approved wanton.
Leon. Dear my lord, if you, in your own proof,
Have vanquish'd the
resistance of her youth
And made defeat of her virginity--
Claud. I know what you would say. If I have known her,
You will say she did
embrace me as a husband,
And so extenuate the forehand sin.
No, Leonato,
I never tempted her with word too large,
But, as a brother to his sister, show'd
Bashful
sincerity and
comely love.
Hero. And seem'd I ever
otherwise to you?
Claud. Out on the seeming! I will write against it.
You seem to me as Dian in her orb,
As
chaste as is the bud ere it be blown;
But you are more intemperate in your blood
Than Venus, or those pamp'red animals
That rage in
savage sensuality.
Hero. Is my lord well that he doth speak so wide?
Leon. Sweet Prince, why speak not you?
Pedro. What should I speak?
I stand dishonour'd that have gone about
To link my dear friend to a common stale.
Leon. Are these things
spoken, or do I but dream?
John. Sir, they are
spoken, and these things are true.
Bene. This looks not like a nuptial.
Hero. 'True!' O God!
Claud. Leonato, stand I here?