Very well then! what must I do?
BDELYCLEON

Take off your cloak, and put on this tunic in its stead.
PHILOCLEON

Was it worth while to beget and bring up children, so that this
one should now wish to choke me?

BDELYCLEON
Come, take this tunic and put it on without so much talk.

PHILOCLEON
Great gods! what sort of a cursed garment is this?

BDELYCLEON
Some call it a pelisse, others a Persian cloak.

PHILOCLEON
Ah! I thought it was a wraprascal like those made at Thymaetis.

BDELYCLEON
No wonder. It's only at Sardis you could have seen them, and you

have never been there.
PHILOCLEON

Of course not, but it seems to me exactly like the mantle Morychus
sports.

BDELYCLEON
Not at all; I tell you they are woven at Ecbatana.

PHILOCLEON
What! are there woollen ox-guts then at Ecbatana?

BDELYCLEON
Whatever are you talking about? These are woven by the

barbarians at great cost. I am certain this pelisse has consumed
more than a talent of wool.

PHILOCLEON
It should be called wool-waster then instead of pelisse.

BDELYCLEON
Come, father, just hold still for a moment and put it on.

PHILOCLEON
Oh! horrors! what a waft of heat the hussy sends up my nose!

BDELYCLEON
Will you have done with this fooling?

PHILOCLEON
No by Zeus.

BDELYCLEON
But good sir....

PHILOCLEON
If need be, I prefer you should put me in the oven.

BDELYCLEON
Come, I will put it round you. There!

PHILOCLEON
At all events, bring out a crook.

BDELYCLEON
Why, whatever for?

PHILOCLEON
To drag me out of it before I am quite melted.

BDELYCLEON
Now take off those wretched clogs and put on these nice Laconian

slippers.
PHILOCLEON

I put on odious slippers made by our foes! Never
BDELYCLEON

Come! put your foot in and push hard. Quick!
PHILOCLEON

You're doing wrong here. You want me to put my foot on Laconian
ground.

BDELYCLEON
Now the other.

PHILOCLEON
Ah! no, not that foot; one of its toes holds the Laconians in

horror
BDELYCLEON

Positively you must.
PHILOCLEON

Alas! alas! Then I shall have no chilblains in my old age.
BDELYCLEON

Now, hurry up and get them on; and now imitate the easy effeminate
gait of the rich. See, like this.

(He takes a few steps.)
PHILOCLEON (trying to do likewise)

There!.... Look at my get-up and tell me which rich man I most
resemble in my walk.

BDELYCLEON
Why, you look like a garlicplaster on a boil.

PHILOCLEON
Ah! I am longing to swagger and sway my arse about.

BDELYCLEON
Now, will you know how to talk gravely with well-informed men of

good class?
PHILOCLEON

Undoubtedly.
BDELYCLEON

What will you say to them?
PHILOCLEON

Oh, lots of things. First of all I shall say, that Lamia, seeing
herself caught, let flee a fart; then, that Cardopion and his

mother....
BDELYCLEON

Come, no fabulous tales, pray! talk of realities, of domestic
facts, as is usually done.

PHILOCLEON
Ah! I know something that is indeed most domestic. Once upon a

time there was a rat and a cat....
BDELYCLEON

"Oh, you ignorant fool," as Theagenes said to the dung-gatherer in
a rage. Are you going to talk of cats and rats among high-class

people?
PHILOCLEON

Then what should I talk about?
BDELYCLEON

Tell some dignified story. Relate how you were sent on a solemn
mission with Androcles and Clisthenes.

PHILOCLEON
On a mission! never in my life, except once to Paros, a job

which brought me in two obols a day.
BDELYCLEON

At least say, that you have just seen Ephudion doing well in the
pancratium with Ascondas and, that despite his age and his white hair,

he is still robust in loin and arm and flank and that his chest is a
very breast-plate.

PHILOCLEON
Stop! stop! what nonsense! Who ever contested at the pancratium

with a breast-plate on?
BDELYCLEON

That is how well-behaved folk like to talk. But another thing.
When at wine, it would be fitting to relate some good story of your

youthful days. What is your most brilliant feat?
PHILOCLEON

My best feat? Ah! when I stole Ergasion's vine-props.
BDELYCLEON

You and your vine-props! you'll be the death of me! Tell of one of
your boar-hunts or of when you coursed the hare. Talk about some

torch-race you were in; tell of some deed of daring.
PHILOCLEON

Ah! my most daring dee, was when, quite a young man still, I
prosecuted Phayllus, the runner, for defamation, and he was

condemded by majority of two votes.
BDELYCLEON

Enough of that! Now recline there, and practise the bearing that
is fitting at table in society.

PHILOCLEON
How must I recline? Tell me quick!

BDELYCLEON
In an elegant style.

PHILOCLEON (lying on the ground)
Like this?

BDELYCLEON
Not at all.

PHILOCLEON
How then?

BDELYCLEON
Spread your knees on the tapestries and give your body the most

easy curves, like those taught in the gymnasium. Then praise some
bronze vase, survey the ceiling, admire the awning stretched over

the court. Water is poured over our hands; the tables are spread; we
sup and, after ablution, we now offer libations to the gods.

PHILOCLEON
But, by Zeus! this supper is but a dream, it appears!

BDELYCLEON
The flute-player has finished the prelude. The guests are Theorus,

Aeschines, Phanus, Cleon, Acestor; and beside this last, I don't
know who else. You are with them. Shall you know exactly how to take

up the songs that are started?
PHILOCLEON

Quite well.
BDELYCLEON

Really?
PHILOCLEON

Better than any born mountaineer of Attica.
BDELYCLEON

That we shall see. Suppose me to be Cleon. I am the first to begin
the song of Harmodius, and you take it up: "There never yet was seen

in Athens....
PHILOCLEON

....such a rogue or such a thief."
BDELYCLEON

Why, you wretched man, it will be the end of you if you sing that.
He will vow your ruin, your destruction, to chase you out of the

country.
PHILOCLEON

Well! then I shall answer his threats with another song: "With
your madness for supreme power, you will end by overthrowing the city,

which even now totters towards ruin."
BDELYCLEON

And when Theorus, prone at Cleon's feet, takes his hand and sings,
"Like Admetus, love those who are brave," what reply will you make

him?
PHILOCLEON

I shall sing, "I know not how to play the fox, nor call myself the
friend of both parties."

BDELYCLEON
Then comes the turn of Aeschines, the son of Sellus, and a

well-trained and clever musician, who will sing, "Good things and
riches for Clitagora and me and eke for the Thessalians!"

PHILOCLEON
"The two of us have squandered a great deal between us."

BDELYCLEON
At this game you seem at home. But come, we will go and dine

with Philoctemon.-Slave! slave! place our dinner in a basket; we are
going out for a good long drinking bout.

PHILOCLEON
By no means, it is too dangerous; for after drinking, one breaks

in doors, one comes to blows, one batters everything. Anon, when the
wine is slept off, one is forced to pay.

ELYCLEON
Not if you are with decent people. Either they undertake to

appease the offended person or, better still, you say something witty,

• garment [´gɑ:mənt] n.衣服，外衣 (初中英语单词)
• persian [´pə:ʃən] a.波斯的 n.波斯人 (初中英语单词)
• talent [´tælənt] n.天才；才干；天资 (初中英语单词)
• whatever [wɔt´evə] pron.&a.无论什么 (初中英语单词)
• wretched [´retʃid] a.可怜的；倒霉的 (初中英语单词)
• gravely [´greivli] ad.庄重地，严肃地 (初中英语单词)
• domestic [də´mestik] a.家庭的；本国的 (初中英语单词)
• ignorant [´ignərənt] a.无知的，愚昧的 (初中英语单词)
• relate [ri´leit] v.阐明；使联系；涉及 (初中英语单词)
• despite [di´spait] prep.尽管 (初中英语单词)
• brilliant [´briliənt] a.灿烂的；杰出的 (初中英语单词)
• practise [´præktis] v.实践(行，施)；提倡 (初中英语单词)
• survey [´sə:vei] vt.&n.俯瞰；审视；测量 (初中英语单词)
• destruction [di´strʌkʃən] n.破坏，毁灭 (初中英语单词)
• supreme [su:´pri:m, sju:-] a.最高的，无上的 (初中英语单词)
• undertake [,ʌndə´teik] vt.从事；承担；担保 (初中英语单词)
• mantle [´mæntl] n.斗蓬 v.覆盖；笼罩 (高中英语单词)
• imitate [´imiteit] vt.模仿；伪造 (高中英语单词)
• plaster [´plɑ:stə] n.灰泥 vt.厚厚地涂抹 (高中英语单词)
• longing [´lɔŋiŋ] n.&a.渴望(的) (高中英语单词)
• dignified [´dignifaid] a.尊贵的 (高中英语单词)
• runner [´rʌnə] n.奔跑者；走私人(船) (高中英语单词)
• bearing [´beəriŋ] n.举止；忍耐；关系 (高中英语单词)
• elegant [´eligənt] a.文雅的；优美的 (高中英语单词)
• madness [´mædnis] n.疯狂；狂热 (高中英语单词)
• musician [mju:´ziʃən] n.音乐家，作曲家 (高中英语单词)
• decent [´di:sənt] a.体面的，正派的 (高中英语单词)
• odious [´əudiəs] a.可憎的；丑恶的 (英语四级单词)
• daring [´deəriŋ] a.&n.勇敢(的) (英语四级单词)
• mountaineer [,maunti´niə] n.山地人 vi.爬山 (英语四级单词)
• garlic [´gɑ:lik] n.蒜，大蒜 (英语六级单词)
• fabulous [´fæbjuləs] a.难以置信的；惊人的 (英语六级单词)
• robust [rəu´bʌst] a.强建的；茁壮的 (英语六级单词)
• fitting [´fitiŋ] a.适当的 n.试衣 (英语六级单词)
• recline [ri´klain] v.(使)斜倚；躺；向后靠 (英语六级单词)
• gymnasium [dʒim´neiziəm] n.体育馆 (英语六级单词)