What is that?
PHILOCLEON

If only they could bring me an image of the hero Lycus.
BDELYCLEON

Here it is! Why, you might think it was the god himself!
PHILOCLEON

Oh! hero, my master I how repulsive you are to look at I
BDELYCLEON

He looks just like Cleonymus.
PHILOCLEON

That is why, hero though he be, he has no weapon.
BDELYCLEON

The sooner you take your seat, the sooner I shall call a case.
PHILOCLEON

Call it, for I have been seated ever so long.
BDELYCLEON

Let us see. What case shall we bring up first? Is there a slave
who has done something wrong? Ah! you Thracian there, you burnt the

stew-pot the other day.
PHILOCLEON

Wait, wait! This is a fine state of affairs! You almost made me
judge without a bar, and that is the most sacred thing of all for us.

BDELYCLEON
There isn't any, by Zeus.

PHILOCLEON
I'll run indoors and get one myself. (Exit)

BDELYCLEON
What does it matter? Terrible thing, the force of habit.

XANTHIAS (coming out of the house)
Damn that animal! How can anyone keep such a dog?

BDELYCLEON
Hullo! what's the matter?

XANTHIAS
Oh, it's Labes, who has just rushed into the kitchen and seized

a whole Sicilian cheese and gobbled it up.
BDELYCLEON

Good! this will be the first offence I shall make my father try.
(To XANTHIAS) Come along and lay your accusation. XANTHIAS No, not

I; the other dog vows he will be accuser, if the matter is brought
up for trial.

BDELYCLEON
Well then, bring them both along.

XANTHIAS
That's what we'll have to do.

(He goes hack into the house. A moment later PHILOCLEON comes
out.)

BDELYCLEON
What is this?

PHILOCLEON
The pig-trough of the swine dedicated to Hestia.

BDELYCLEON
Did you steal it from a shrine?

PHILOCLEON
No, no, by addressing Hestia first, I might, thanks to her,

crush an adversary. But put an end to delay by calling up the case. My
verdict is already settled.

BDELYCLEON
Wait! I still have to bring out the tablets and the scrolls.

(He goes into the house.)
PHILOCLEON

Oh! I am boiling, I am dying with impatience at your delays. I
could have traced the sentence in the dust.

BDELYCLEON (coming out with tablets and scrolls)
There you are.

PHILOCLEON
Then call the case.

BDELYCLEON
Right. Who is first on the docket?

PHILOCLEON
My god! This is unbearable! I have forgotten the urns.

BDELYCLEON
Now where are you going?

PHILOCLEON
To look for the urns.

BDELYCLEON
Don't bother, I have these pots.

PHILOCLEON
Very well, then we have all we need, except the clepsydra.

BDELYCLEON (pointing to the thunder-mug)
What is this if it is not a clepsydra?

PHILOCLEON
You know how to supply everything.

BDELYCLEON
Let fire be brought quickly from the house with myrtle boughs

and incense, and let us invoke the gods before opening the sitting.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS

Offer them libations and your vows and we will thank them that a
noble agreement has put an end to your bickerings and strife. And

first let there be a sacred silence.
CHORUS (singing)

Oh! god of Delphi! oh! Phoebus Apollo! convert into the greatest
blessing for us all what is now happening before this house, and

cure us of our error, oh, Paean, our helper!
BDELYCLEON (solemnly)

Oh, Powerful god, Apollo Aguieus, who watchest at the door of my
entrance hall, accept this fresh sacrifice; I offer it that you may

deign to soften my father's excessiveseverity; he is as hard as iron,
his heart is like sour wine; do thou pour into it a little honey.

Let him become gentle toward other men, let him take more interest
in the accused than in the accusers, may he allow himself to be

softened by entreaties; calm his acrid humour and deprive his
irritable mind of all sting.

CHORUS (singing)
We unite our vows and chants to those of this new magistrate.

His words have won our favour and we are convinced that he loves the
people more than any of the young men of the present day.

(XANTHIAS brings in two persons costumed as dogs, but with masks
that suggest Laches and Cleon.)

BDELYCLEON
If there be any judge near at hand, let him enter; once the

proceedings have opened, we shall admit him no more.
PHILOCLEON

Who is the defendant?
BDELYCLEON

This one.
PHILOCLEON (aside)

He does not stand a chance.
BDELYCLEON

Listen to the indictment. A dog of Cydathenaea doth hereby
charge Labes of Aexonia with having devoured a Sicilian cheese by

himself without accomplices. Penalty demanded, a collar of fig-tree
wood.

PHILOCLEON
Nay, a dog's death, if convicted.

BDELYCLEON
This is Labes, the defendant.

PHILOCLEON
Oh! what a wretched brute! how entirely he looks the rogue! He

thinks to deceive me by keeping his jaws closed. Where is the
plaintiff, the dog of Cydathenaea?

DOG
Bow wow! bow wow!

BDELYCLEON
Here he is.

PHILOCLEON
Why, he's another Labes, a great barker and a licker of dishes.

BDELYCLEON (as Herald)
Silence! Keep your seats! (To the Cydathenaean dog.) And you, up

on your feet and accuse him.
PHILOCLEON

Go on, and I will help myself and eat these lentils.
DOG

Gentlemen of the jury, listen to this indictment I have drawn
up. He has committed the blackest of crimes, against both me and the

seamen. He sought refuge in a dark corner to glutton on a big Sicilian
cheese, with which he sated his hunger.

PHILOCLEON
Why, the crime is clear; the filthy brute this very moment belched

forth a horrible odour of cheese right under my nose.
DOG

And he refused to share with me. And yet can anyone style
himself your benefactor, when he does not cast a morsel to your poor

dog?
PHILOCLEON

He has not shared anything, not even with his comrade. His madness
is as hot as my lentils.

BDELYCLEON
In the name of the gods, father! No hurriedverdict without

hearing the other side!
PHILOCLEON

But the evidence is plain; the fact speaks for itself.
DOG

Then beware of acquitting the most selfish of canine gluttons, who
has devoured the whole cheese, rind and all, prowling round the

platter.
PHILOCLEON

There is not even enough left for me to fill up the chinks in my
pitcher.

DOG
Besides, you must punish him, because the same house cannot keep

two thieves. Let me not have barked in vain, else I shall never bark
again.

PHILOCLEON
Oh! the black deeds he has just denounced! What a shameless thief!

Say, cock, is not that your opinion too? Ha, ha! He thinks as I do.
Here, Thesmothetes! where are you? Hand me the thunder-mug.

BDELYCLEON
Get it yourself. I go to call the witnesses; these are a plate,

a pestle, a cheese knife, a brazier, a stew-pot and other half-burnt
utensils. (To PHILOCLEON) But you have not finished? you are

piddling away still! Have done and be seated.
PHILOCLEON

Ha, ha! I reckon I know somebody who will crap for fright to-day.
BDELYCLEON

Will you never cease showing yourself hard and intractable, and
especially to the accused? You tear them to pieces tooth and nail. (To

LABES) Come forward and defend yourself. What means this silence?
Answer.

PHILOCLEON
No doubt he has nothing to say.

BDELYCLEON
Not at all, I think he has got what happened once to Thucydides in

court; his jaws suddenly set fast. Get away! I will undertake your
defence.-Gentlemen of the jury, it is a difficult thing to speak for a

dog who has been calumniated, but nevertheless I will try. He is a
good dog, and he chases wolves finely.

PHILOCLEON
He is a thief and a conspirator.

BDELYCLEON
No, he is the best of all our dogs; he is capable of guarding a

whole flock.

• sacred [´seikrid] a.神圣的；庄严的 (初中英语单词)
• cheese [tʃi:z] n.干酪，乳酪 (初中英语单词)
• sentence [´sentəns] n.判决 vt.宣判；处刑 (初中英语单词)
• bother [´bɔðə] v.打扰 n.麻烦(事) (初中英语单词)
• opening [´əupəniŋ] n.开放；开端 a.开始的 (初中英语单词)
• agreement [ə´gri:mənt] n.同意；一致；协议 (初中英语单词)
• convert [kən´və:t, ´kɔnvə:t] v.转变 n.改变信仰者 (初中英语单词)
• apollo [ə´pɔləu] n.阿波罗 (初中英语单词)
• soften [´sɔfən] v.使(变)软(柔和) (初中英语单词)
• humour [´hju:mə] n.幽默，诙谐 (初中英语单词)
• collar [´kɔlə] n.衣领；(狗等的)项圈 (初中英语单词)
• wretched [´retʃid] a.可怜的；倒霉的 (初中英语单词)
• deceive [di´si:v] vt.欺骗，欺诈 (初中英语单词)
• accuse [ə´kju:z] vt.谴责；控告，告发 (初中英语单词)
• refuge [´refju:dʒ] v.&n.避难(所)；庇护 (初中英语单词)
• horrible [´hɔrəbəl] a.可怕的；恐怖的 (初中英语单词)
• selfish [´selfiʃ] a.自私的，利己的 (初中英语单词)
• punish [´pʌniʃ] vt.(惩)罚；痛击；折磨 (初中英语单词)
• reckon [´rekən] v.计算；认为；估计 (初中英语单词)
• fright [frait] n.惊吓；恐怖；怪人 (初中英语单词)
• undertake [,ʌndə´teik] vt.从事；承担；担保 (初中英语单词)
• nevertheless [,nevəðə´les] conj.&ad.然而；不过 (初中英语单词)
• capable [´keipəbəl] a.有能力；能干的 (初中英语单词)
• indoors [,in´dɔ:z] ad.在屋里 (高中英语单词)
• incense [´insens, in´sens] n.香(气) vt.激怒 (高中英语单词)
• strife [straif] n.竞争；吵架；冲突 (高中英语单词)
• excessive [ik´sesiv] a.过分的；极端的 (高中英语单词)
• deprive [di´praiv] vt.剥夺，使丧失 (高中英语单词)
• penalty [´penlti] n.刑罚；惩罚；障碍 (高中英语单词)
• hurried [´hʌrid] a.仓促的，慌忙的 (高中英语单词)
• beware [bi´weə] v.(用于祈使句)谨防 (高中英语单词)
• accusation [ækju:´zeiʃən] n.谴责；告发 (英语四级单词)
• adversary [´ædvəsəri] n.敌手，对手 (英语四级单词)
• impatience [im´peiʃəns] n.不耐烦，急躁 (英语四级单词)
• happening [´hæpəniŋ] n.事件，偶然发生的事 (英语四级单词)
• severity [si´veriti] n.严厉；严重；苛刻 (英语四级单词)
• filthy [´filθi] a.污秽的，肮脏的 (英语四级单词)
• morsel [´mɔ:səl] n.佳肴 vt.少量地分配 (英语四级单词)
• verdict [´və:dikt] n.裁决，判决；判定 (英语四级单词)
• thieves [θi:vz] thief的复数 (英语四级单词)
• calling [´kɔ:liŋ] n.点名；职业；欲望 (英语六级单词)
• myrtle [´mə:tl] n.桃金娘科 (英语六级单词)
• invoke [in´vəuk] vt.调用，请求 (英语六级单词)
• phoebus [´fi:bəs] n.太阳神 (英语六级单词)
• indictment [in´daitmənt] n.控诉，告发；起诉书 (英语六级单词)
• benefactor [´beni,fæktə] n.捐助人；恩人 (英语六级单词)