PHILOCLEON
And what good is that, if he eats the cheese?
BDELYCLEON
What? he fights for you, he guards your door; he is an excellent
dog in every respect. Forgive him his larceny! he is wretchedly
ignorant, he cannot play the lyre.
PHILOCLEON
I wish he did not know how to write either; then the rascal
would not have drawn up his pleadings.
BDELYCLEON
Witnesses, I pray you, listen. Come forward, grating-knife, and
speak up; answer me clearly. You were paymaster at the time. Did you
grate out to the soldiers what was given you?-He says he did so.
PHILOCLEON
But, by Zeus! he lies.
BDELYCLEON
Oh! have
patience. Take pity on the
unfortunate. Labes feeds
only on fish-bones and fishes' heads and has not an
instant of
peace. The other is good only to guard the house; he never moves
from here, but demands his share of all that is brought in and bites
those who refuse.
PHILOCLEON (aside)
Oh! Heaven! have I fallen ill? I feel my anger cooling! Woe to me!
I am softening!
BDELYCLEON
Have pity, father, pity, I adjure you; you would not have him
dead. Where are his puppies? (A group of children costumed as
puppies comes out.) Come, poor little beasties, yap, up on your
haunches, beg and whine!
PHILOCLEON
Descend,
descend,
descend,
descend!
BDELYCLEON
I will
descend, although that word, "
descend," has too often
raised false hope. None the less, I will
descend.
PHILOCLEON
Plague seize it! Have I then done wrong to eat! What! I, crying!
Ah! I certainly should not be
weeping, if I were not stuffed with
lentils.
BDELYCLEON
Then he is
acquitted?
PHILOCLEON
It is difficult to tell.
BDELYCLEON
Ah! my dear father, be good! be humane! Take this voting pebble
and rush with your eyes closed to that second urn and, father,
acquit him.
PHILOCLEON
No, I know no more how to
acquit than to play the lyre.
BDELYCLEON
Come quickly, I will show you the way.
(He takes his father by the hand and leads him to the second urn.)
PHILOCLEON
Is this the first urn?
BDELYCLEON
Yes.
PHILOCLEON (dropping in his vote)
Then I have voted.
BDELYCLEON (aside)
I have fooled him and he has
acquitted in spite of himself. (To
PHILOCLEON) Come, I will turn out the urns.
PHILOCLEON
What is the result?
BDELYCLEON
We shall see. (He examines both urns.) Labes, you stand
acquitted.
(PHILOCLEON faints) Eh! father, what's the matter, what is it? (To
slaves) Water! water! (To PHILOCLEON) Pull yourself together, sir!
PHILOCLEON (weakly)
Tell me! Is he really
acquitted?
BDELYCLEON
Yes, certainly.
PHILOCLEON (falling back)
Then it's all over with me!
BDELYCLEON
Courage, dear father, don't let this
afflict you so terribly.
PHILOCLEON (dolefully)
And so I have charged my
conscience with the
acquittal of an
accused being! What will become of me? Sacred gods!
forgive me. I
did it
despite myself; it is not in my character.
BDELYCLEON
Do not vex yourself, father; I will feed you well, will take you
everywhere to eat and drink with me; you shall go to every feast;
henceforth your life shall be nothing but pleasure, and Hyperbolus
shall no longer have you for a tool. But come, let us go in.
PHILOCLEON (resignedly)
So be it; if you will, let us go in.
(They all go into the house.)
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
Go where it pleases you and may your happiness be great. (The
CHORUS turns and faces the
audience.) You
meanwhile, oh! countless
myriads, listen to the sound counsels I am going to give you and
take care they are not lost upon you. That would be the fate of vulgar
spectators, not that of such an
audience. Hence, people, lend me
your ear, if you love frank speaking.
The poet has a
reproach to make against his
audience; he says
you have ill-treated him in return for the many services he has
rendered you. At first he kept himself in the
background and lent help
secretly to other poets, and like the
prophetic Genius, who hid
himself in the belly of Eurycles, slipped within the spirit of another
and whispered to him many a comic hit. Later he ran the risks of the
theatre on his own
account, with his face uncovered, and dared to
guide his Muse unaided. Though overladen with success and honours more
than any of your poets, indeed
despite all his glory, he does not
yet believe he has attained his goal; his heart is not
swollen with
pride and he does not seek to seduce the young folk in the wrestling
school. If any lover runs up to him to
complain because he is
furious at
seeing the object of his
passion derided on the stage, he
takes no heed of such
reproaches, for he is inspired only with
honest motives and his Muse is no
pander. From the very outset of
his
dramaticcareer he has disdained to
assail those who were men, but
with a courage
worthy of Heracles himself he attacked the most
formidable
monsters, and at the
beginning went straight for that beast
with the sharp teeth, with the terrible eyes that flashed lambent fire
like those of Cynna, surrounded by a hundred lewd flatterers who
spittle-licked him to his heart's content; he had a voice like a
roaring
torrent, the stench of a seal, the unwashed balls of a
Lamia, and the arse of a camel. Our poet did not tremble at the
sight of this
horriblemonster, nor did he dream of gaining him
over; and again this very day he is fighting for your good. Last
year besides, he attacked those pale, shivering and
feverish beings
who strangled your fathers in the dark, throttled your grandfathers,
and who, lying in the beds of the most inoffensive, piled up against
them lawsuits, summonses and witnesses to such an
extent, that many of
them flew in
terror to the Polemarch for
refuge. Such is the
champion you have found to
purify your country of all its evil, and
last year you betrayed him, when he sowed the most novel ideas, which,
however, did not strike root, because you did not understand their
value;
standing" target="_blank" title="prep.&conj.虽然;还是">
notwithstanding this, he swears by Bacchus, the while
offering him libations, that none ever heard better comic verses. It
is a
disgrace to you not to have caught their drift at once; as for
the poet, he is none the less appreciated by the enlightened judges.
He shivered his oars in rushing
boldly forward to board his foe. (With
increasing excitement) But in future, my dear fellow-citizens, love
and honour more those of your poets who seek to imagine and express
some new thought. Make their ideas your own, keep them in your caskets
like sweet-scented fruit. If you do, your clothing will emit an
odour of
wisdom the whole year through.
FIRST SEMI-CHORUS (singing)
Ah, once long ago we were brave in the dance, brave too in battle,
and on this
account alone the most
courageous of men! That was
formerly, was
formerly; all that is gone now and these hairs of ours
are whiter than the swan. But from what is left we must rekindle a
youthful
ardour; really we prefer our old age to the curly hair and
the fine clothes and the effeminacy of many of the young.
LEADER OF THE FIRST SEMI-CHORUS
Should any among you spectators look upon me with wonder,
because of this wasp waist, or not know the meaning of this sting, I
will soon
dispel his
ignorance. We, who wear this appendage, are the
true Attic men, who alone are noble and native to the soil, the
bravest of all people. We are the ones who,
weapon in hand, did so
much for the country, when the
barbarian shed
torrents of fire and
smoke over our city in his
relentless desire to seize our nests by
force. At once we ran up, armed with lance and buckler, and, drunk
with the bitter wine of anger, we gave them battle, man
standing to
man and rage distorting our lips. A hail of arrows hid the sky.
However, by the help of the gods, we drove off the foe to, wards
evening. Before the battle an owl had flown over our army. Then we
pursued them with our lance-point in their loins as one hunts the
tunny-fish; they fled and we stung them in the jaw and in the eyes, so
that even now the
barbarians tell each other that there is nothing
in the world more to be feared than the Attic wasp.
SECOND SEMI-CHORUS (singing)
Oh! at that time I was terrible, I feared nothing; forth on my
galleys I went in search of my foe and subjected him. Then we never
thought of rounding fine phrases, we never dreamt of calumny; it was
who should prove the strongest rower. And thus we took many a town
from the Medes, and 'tis to us that Athens owes the tributes that
our young men thieve to-day.
LEADER OF THE SECOND SEMI-CHORUS
Look well at us, and you will see that we have all the character
and habits of the wasp. Firstly, if roused, no beings are more
irascible, more
relentless than we are. In all other things, too, we
act like wasps. We collect in swarms, in a kind of nests, and some
go judging with the Archon, some with the Eleven, others at the Odeon;
there are yet others, who hardly move at all, like the grubs in the
cells, but remain glued to the walls, and bent double to the ground.
We also pay full attention to the discovery of all sorts of means of
existing and sting the first who comes, so as to live at his
expense. Finally, we have among us drones, who have no sting and
who, without giving themselves the least trouble, seize on our
revenues as they flow past them and
devour them. It's this that
grieves us most of all, to see men who have never served or held
either lance or oar in defence of their country, enriching
themselves at our expense without ever raising a
blister on their
hands. In short, I give it as my
deliberate opinion that in future
every citizen not possessed of a sting shall not receive the
triobolus.
(PRILOCLEON comes out of the house, followed by his son and a
slave. The CHORUS turns to face them.)
PHILOCLEON
As long as I live, I will never give up this cloak; it's the one I
wore in that battle when Boreas delivered us from such
fierce attacks.
BDELYCLEON
You do not know what is good for you.
PHILOCLEON
Ah! I do not know how to use fine clothing! The other day, when
cramming myself with fried fish, I dropped so many
grease spots that I
had to pay three obols to the cleaner.
BDELYCLEON
At least have a try, since you have once for all handed the care
for your
well-being over to me.
PHILOCLEON