And, as a friend remarked, rhinos are such a mussy death. One

poor chap, killed while we were away on our first trip, could not
be moved from the spot where he had been trampled. A few

shovelfuls of earth over the remains was all the rhinoceros had
left possible.

Fortunately, in the thick stuff especially, it is often possible
to avoid the chance rhinoceros through the warning given by the

rhinoceros birds. These are birds about the size of a robin that
accompany the beast everywhere. They sit in a row along his back

occupying themselves with ticks and a good place to roost. Always
they are peaceful and quiet until a human being approaches. Then

they flutter a few feet into the air uttering a peculiar rapid
chattering. Writers with more sentiment than sense of proportion

assure us that this warns the rhinoceros of approaching danger!
On the contrary, I always looked at it the other way. The

rhinoceros birds thereby warned ME of danger, and I was duly
thankful.

The safari boys stand quite justly in a holy awe of the rhino.
The safari is strung out over a mile or two of country, as a

usual thing, and a downwind rhino is sure to pierce some part of
the line in his rush. Then down go the loads with a smash, and up

the nearest trees swarm the boys. Usually their refuges are thorn
trees, armed, even on the main trunk, with long sharp spikes.

There is no difficulty in going up, but the gingerly coming down,
after all the excitement has died, is a matter of deliberation

and of voices uplifted in woe. Cuninghame tells of an inadequate
slender and springy, but solitary, sapling into which swarmed

half his safari on the advent of a rambunctious rhino. The tree
swayed and bent and cracked alarmingly, threatening to dump the

whole lot on the ground. At each crack the boys yelled. This
attracted the rhinoceros, which immediately charged the tree full

tilt. He hit square, the tree shivered and creaked, the boys
wound their arms and legs around the slender support and howled

frantically. Again and again rhinoceros drew back to repeat his
butting of that tree. By the time Cuninghame reached the spot,

the tree, with its despairing burden of black birds, was clinging
to the soil by its last remaining roots.

In the Nairobi Club I met a gentleman with one arm gone at the
shoulder. He told his story in a slightly bored and drawling

voice, picking his words very carefully, and evidently most
occupied with neither understating nor overstating the case. It

seems he had been out, and had killed some sort of a buck. While
his men were occupied with this, he strolled on alone to see what

he could find. He found a rhinoceros, that charged viciously, and
into which he emptied his gun.

"When I came to," he said, "it was just coming on dusk, and the
lions were beginning to grunt. My arm was completely crushed, and

I was badly bruised and knocked about. As near as I could
remember I was fully ten miles from camp. A circle of carrion

birds stood all about me not more than ten feet away, and a great
many others were flapping over me and fighting in the air. These

last were so close that I could feel the wind from their wings.
It was rawther gruesome." He paused and thought a a moment, as

though weighing his words. "In fact," he added with an air of
final conviction, "it was QUITE gruesome!"

The most calm and imperturbable rhinoceros I ever saw was one
that made us a call on the Thika River. It was just noon, and our

boys were making camp after a morning's march. The usual racket
was on, and the usual variedmovement of rather confused

industry. Suddenly silence fell. We came out of the tent to see
the safari gazing spellbound in one direction. There was a

rhinoceros wandering peaceably over the little knoll back of
camp, and headed exactly in our direction. While we watched, he

strolled through the edge of camp, descended the steep bank to
the river's edge, drank, climbed the bank, strolled through camp

again and departed over the hill. To us he paid not the slightest
attention. It seems impossible to believe that he neither scented

nor saw any evidences of human life in all that populated flat,
especially when one considers how often these beasts will SEEM to

become aware of man's presence by telepathy.* Perhaps he was the
one exception to the whole race, and was a good-natured rhino.

*Opposing theories are those of "instinct," and of slight causes,
such a grasshoppers leaping before the hunter's feet, not noticed

by the man approaching.
The babies are astonishing and amusing creatures, with blunt

noses on which the horns are just beginning to form, and with
even fewer manners than their parents. The mere fact of an

800-pound baby does not cease to be curious. They are truculent
little creatures, and sometimes rather hard to avoid when they

get on the warpath. Generally, as far as my observation goes, the
mother gives birth to but one at a time. There may be occasional

twin births, but I happen never to have met so interesting a
family.

Rhinoceroses are still very numerous-too numerous. I have seen
as many as fourteen in two hours, and probably could have found

as many more if I had been searching for them. There is no doubt,
however, that this species must be the first to disappear of the

larger African animals. His great size combined with his 'orrid
'abits mark him for early destruction. No such dangerous lunatic

can be allowed at large in a settled country, nor in a country
where men are travelling constantly. The species will probably be

preserved in appropriate restricted areas. It would be a great
pity to have so perfect an example of the Prehistoric Pinhead

wiped out completely. Elsewhere he will diminish, and finally
disappear.

For one thing, and for one thing only, is the traveller indebted
to the rhinoceros. The beast is lazy, large, and has an excellent

eye for easy ways through. For this reason, as regards the
question of good roads, he combines the excellent qualities of

Public Sentiment, the Steam Roller, and the Expert Engineer.
Through thorn thickets impenetrable to anything less armoured

than a Dreadnaught like himself he clears excellent paths. Down
and out of eroded ravines with perpendicular sides he makes

excellent wide trails, tramped hard, on easy grades, often with
zigzags to ease the slant. In some of the high country where the

torrential rains wash hundreds of such gullies across the line of
march it is hardly an exaggeration to say that travel would be

practically impossible without the rhino trails wherewith to
cross. Sometimes the perpendicular banks will extend for miles

without offering any natural break down to the stream-bed. Since
this is so I respectfullysubmit to Government the following

proposal:
(a) That a limited number of these beasts shall be licensed as

Trail Rhinos; and that all the rest shall be killed from the
settled and regularly travelled districts.

(b) That these Trail Rhinos shall be suitably hobbled by short
steel chains.

(c) That each Trail Rhino shall carry painted conspicuously on
his side his serial number.

(d) That as a further precaution for public safety each Trail
Rhino shall carry firmly attached to his tail a suitable red

warning flag. Thus the well-known habit of the rhinoceros of
elevating his tail rigidly when about to charge, or when in the

act of charging, will fly the flag as a warning to travellers.
(e) That an official shall be appointed to be known as the

Inspector of Rhinos whose duty it shall be to examine the
hobbles, numbers and flags of all Trail Rhinos, and to keep the

same in due working order and repair.
And I do submit to all and sundry that the above resolutions have

as much sense to them as have most of the petitions submitted to