last town. I remember, when we came into L'Isle Adam, for
instance, how we met dozens of pleasure-boats outing it for the
afternoon, and there was nothing to
distinguish the true
voyager
from the
amateur, except, perhaps, the
filthy condition of my sail.
The company in one boat
actually thought they recognised me for a
neighbour. Was there ever anything more wounding? All the
romancehad come down to that. Now, on the upper Oise, where nothing
sailed as a general thing but fish, a pair of canoeists could not
be thus vulgarly explained away; we were strange and picturesque
intruders; and out of people's wonder
sprang a sort of light and
passing
intimacy all along our route. There is nothing but tit-
for-tat in this world, though sometimes it be a little difficult to
trace: for the scores are older than we ourselves, and there has
never yet been a settling-day since things were. You get
entertainment pretty much in
proportion as you give. As long as we
were a sort of odd wanderers, to be stared at and followed like a
quack doctor or a
caravan, we had no want of
amusement in return;
but as soon as we sank into
commonplace ourselves, all whom we met
were
similarly disenchanted. And here is one reason of a dozen,
why the world is dull to dull persons.
In our earlier adventures there was generally something to do, and
that quickened us. Even the showers of rain had a revivifying
effect, and shook up the brain from torpor. But now, when the
river no longer ran in a proper sense, only glided
seaward with an
even, outright, but imperceptible speed, and when the sky smiled
upon us day after day without
variety, we began to slip into that
golden doze of the mind which follows upon much exercise in the
open air. I have stupefied myself in this way more than once;
indeed, I
dearly love the feeling; but I never had it to the same
degree as when paddling down the Oise. It was the apotheosis of
stupidity.
We ceased
reading entirely. Sometimes when I found a new paper, I
took a particular pleasure in
reading a single number of the
current novel; but I never could bear more than three instalments;
and even the second was a
disappointment. As soon as the tale
became in any way perspicuous, it lost all merit in my eyes; only a
single scene, or, as is the way with these FEUILLETONS, half a
scene, without antecedent or
consequence, like a piece of a dream,
had the knack of fixing my interest. The less I saw of the novel,
the better I liked it: a
pregnantreflection. But for the most
part, as I said, we neither of us read anything in the world, and
employed the very little while we were awake between bed and dinner
in poring upon maps. I have always been fond of maps, and can
voyage in an atlas with the greatest
enjoyment. The names of
places are singularly
inviting; the
contour of coasts and rivers is
enthralling to the eye; and to hit, in a map, upon some place you
have heard of before, makes history a new possession. But we
thumbed our charts, on these evenings, with the blankest unconcern.
We cared not a
fraction for this place or that. We stared at the
sheet as children listen to their
rattle; and read the names of
towns or villages to forget them again at once. We had no
romancein the matter; there was nobody so fancy-free. If you had taken
the maps away while we were studying them most
intently, it is a
fair bet whether we might not have continued to study the table
with the same delight.
About one thing we were mightily taken up, and that was eating. I
think I made a god of my belly. I remember
dwelling in imagination
upon this or that dish till my mouth watered; and long before we
got in for the night my
appetite was a clamant,
instant annoyance.
Sometimes we
paddled
alongside for a while and whetted each other
with gastronomical fancies as we went. Cake and sherry, a homely
rejection, but not within reach upon the Oise, trotted through my
head for many a mile; and once, as we were approaching Verberie,
the CIGARETTE brought my heart into my mouth by the
suggestion of
oyster-patties and Sauterne.
I suppose none of us recognise the great part that is played in
life by eating and drinking. The
appetite is so
imperious that we
can
stomach the least interesting viands, and pass off a dinner-
hour thankfully enough on bread and water; just as there are men
who must read something, if it were only BRADSHAW'S GUIDE. But
there is a
romance about the matter after all. Probably the table
has more devotees than love; and I am sure that food is much more
generally entertaining than
scenery. Do you give in, as Walt
Whitman would say, that you are any the less
immortal for that?
The true materialism is to be
ashamed of what we are. To detect
the flavour of an olive is no less a piece of human
perfection than
to find beauty in the colours of the sunset.
Canoeing was easy work. To dip the
paddle at the proper
inclination, now right, now left; to keep the head down
stream; to
empty the little pool that gathered in the lap of the apron; to
screw up the eyes against the glittering sparkles of sun upon the
water; or now and again to pass below the whistling tow-rope of the
DEO GRATIAS of Conde, or the FOUR SONS OF AYMON - there was not
much art in that; certain silly muscles managed it between sleep
and waking; and
meanwhile the brain had a whole
holiday, and went
to sleep. We took in, at a glance, the larger features of the
scene; and
beheld, with half an eye, bloused fishers and dabbling
washerwomen on the bank. Now and again we might be half-wakened by
some church spire, by a leaping fish, or by a trail of river grass
that clung about the
paddle and had to be plucked off and thrown
away. But these
luminous intervals were only
partiallyluminous.
A little more of us was called into action, but never the whole.
The central
bureau of nerves, what in some moods we call Ourselves,
enjoyed its
holiday without
disturbance, like a Government Office.
The great wheels of
intelligence turned idly in the head, like fly-
wheels, grinding no grist. I have gone on for half an hour at a
time, counting my strokes and forgetting the hundreds. I flatter
myself the beasts that
perish could not underbid that, as a low
form of
consciousness. And what a pleasure it was! What a hearty,
tolerant
temper did it bring about! There is nothing captious
about a man who has attained to this, the one possible apotheosis
in life, the Apotheosis of Stupidity; and he begins to feel
dignified and longaevous like a tree.
There was one odd piece of practical metaphysics which accompanied
what I may call the depth, if I must not call it the
intensity, of
my abstraction. What philosophers call ME and NOT-ME, EGO and NON
EGO,
preoccupied me whether I would or no. There was less ME and
more NOT-ME than I was accustomed to expect. I looked on upon
somebody else, who managed the paddling; I was aware of somebody
else's feet against the
stretcher; my own body seemed to have no
more
intimate relation to me than the canoe, or the river, or the
river banks. Nor this alone: something inside my mind, a part of
my brain, a
province of my proper being, had thrown off allegiance
and set up for itself, or perhaps for the somebody else who did the
paddling. I had dwindled into quite a little thing in a corner of
myself. I was isolated in my own skull. Thoughts presented
themselves unbidden; they were not my thoughts, they were plainly
some one else's; and I considered them like a part of the
landscape. I take it, in short, that I was about as near Nirvana
as would be
convenient in practical life; and if this be so, I make
the Buddhists my
sincere compliments; 'tis an
agreeable state, not
very
consistent with
mental brilliancy, not exactly
profitable in a
money point of view, but very calm, golden, and incurious, and one
that sets a man superior to alarms. It may be best figured by
supposing yourself to get dead drunk, and yet keep sober to enjoy
it. I have a notion that open-air labourers must spend a large
portion of their days in this ecstatic stupor, which explains their
high
composure and
endurance. A pity to go to the expense of
laudanum, when here is a better
paradise for nothing!
This frame of mind was the great
exploit of our
voyage, take it all
in all. It was the
farthest piece of travel
accomplished. Indeed,
it lies so far from
beaten paths of language, that I
despair of
getting the reader into
sympathy with the smiling, complacent
idiocy of my condition; when ideas came and went like motes in a
sunbeam; when trees and church spires along the bank surged up,
from time to time into my notice, like solid objects through a
rolling cloudland; when the rhythmical swish of boat and
paddle in