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The Lily of the Valley-Part20_Honore de Balzac(1799-1850)_Translated Works(翻译文学)-第2页

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him; later, you will find the same men caught by the thorns which



they might have rendered pointless, and missing their triumph for

some trivial reason; whereas the man who is early trained to a



sense of duty does not meet the same obstacles; he may attain

success less rapidly, but when attained it is solid and does not



crumble like that of others.

When I show you that the application of this doctrine demands in



the first place a mastery of the science of manners, you may think

my jurisprudence has a flavor of the court and of the training I



received as a Lenoncourt. My dear friend, I do attach great

importance to that training, trifling as it seems. You will find



that the habits of the great world are as important to you as the

wide and varied knowledge that you possess. Often they take the



place of such knowledge; for some really ignorant men, born with

natural gifts and accustomed to give connection to their ideas,



have been known to attain a grandeur never reached by others far

more worthy of it. I have studied you thoroughly, Felix, wishing



to know if your education, derived wholly from schools, has

injured your nature. God knows the joy with which I find you fit



for that further education of which I speak.

The manners of many who are brought up in the traditions of the



great world are purelyexternal; true politeness, perfect manners,

come from the heart, and from a deep sense of personal dignity.



This is why some men of noble birth are, in spite of their

training, ill-mannered, while others, among the middle classes,



have instinctive good taste and only need a few lessons to give

them excellent manners without any signs of awkward imitation.



Believe a poor woman who no longer leaves her valley when she

tells you that this dignity of tone, this courteoussimplicity in



words, in gesture, in bearing, and even in the character of the

home, is a living and material poem, the charm of which is



irresistible; imagine therefore what it is when it takes its

inspiration from the heart. Politeness, dear, consists in seeming



to forget ourselves for others; with many it is social cant, laid

aside when personal self-interest shows its cloven-foot; a noble



then becomes ignoble. But--and this is what I want you to

practise, Felix--true politeness involves a Christian principle;



it is the flower of Love, it requires that we forget ourselves

really. In memory of your Henriette, for her sake, be not a



fountain without water, have the essence and the form of true

courtesy. Never fear to be the dupe and victim of this social



virtue; you will some day gather the fruit of seeds scattered

apparently to the winds.



My father used to say that one of the great offences of sham

politeness was the neglect of promises. When anything is demanded



of you that you cannot do, refuse positively and leave no

loopholes for false hopes; on the other hand, grant at once



whatever you are willing to bestow. Your promptrefusal will make

you friends as well as your prompt benefit, and your character



will stand the higher; for it is hard to say whether a promise

forgotten, a hope deceived does not make us more enemies than a



favor granted brings us friends.

Dear friend, there are certain little matters on which I may



dwell, for I know them, and it comes within my province to impart

them. Be not too confiding, nor frivolous, nor over enthusiastic,



--three rocks on which youth often strikes. Too confiding a nature

loses respect, frivolity brings contempt, and others take



advantage of excessiveenthusiasm. In the first place, Felix, you

will never have more than two or three friends in the course of



your life. Your entire confidence is their right; to give it to




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