barking of the watch-dog, a servant came to meet us,
saying that
Monsieur le comte had gone to Azay in the morning but would soon
return, and that Madame la comtesse was at home. My
companion looked
at me. I fairly trembled lest he should decline to see Madame de
Mortsauf in her husband's
absence; but he told the man to announce us.
With the
eagerness of a child I rushed into the long antechamber which
crosses the whole house.
"Come in, gentlemen," said a golden voice.
Though Madame de Mortsauf had
spoken only one word at the ball, I
recognized her voice, which entered my soul and filled it as a ray of
sunshine fills and gilds a prisoner's
dungeon. Thinking, suddenly,
that she might remember my face, my first
impulse was to fly; but it
was too late,--she appeared in the
doorway, and our eyes met. I know
not which of us blushed deepest. Too much confused for immediate
speech she returned to her seat at an
embroidery frame while the
servant placed two chairs, then she drew out her
needle and counted
some stitches, as if to explain her silence; after which she raised
her head,
gently yet
proudly, in the direction of Monsieur de Chessel
as she asked to what
fortunate circumstance she owed his visit. Though
curious to know the secret of my
unexpected appearance, she looked at
neither of us,--her eyes were fixed on the river; and yet you could
have told by the way she listened that she was able to recognize, as
the blind do, the agitations of a
neighboring soul by the
imperceptible inflexions of the voice.
Monsieur de Chessel gave my name and
biography. I had
lately arrived
at Tours, where my parents had recalled me when the armies threatened
Paris. A son of Touraine to whom Touraine was as yet unknown, she
would find me a young man weakened by
excessive study and sent to
Frapesle to amuse himself; he had already shown me his
estate, which I
saw for the first time. I had just told him that I had walked from
Tours to Frapesle, and fearing for my health--which was really
delicate--he had stopped at Clochegourde to ask her to allow me to
rest there. Monsieur de Chessel told the truth; but the accident
seemed so forced that Madame de Mortsauf distrusted us. She gave me a
cold,
severe glance, under which my own
eyelids fell, as much from a
sense of
humiliation as to hide the tears that rose beneath them. She
saw the
moisture on my
forehead, and perhaps she guessed the tears;
for she offered me the restoratives I needed, with a few kind and
consoling words, which gave me back the power of speech. I blushed
like a young girl, and in a voice as
tremulous as that of an old man I
thanked her and declined.
"All I ask," I said, raising my eyes to hers, which mine now met for
the second time in a glance as rapid as lightning,--"is to rest here.
I am so crippled with
fatigue I really cannot walk farther."
"You must not doubt the
hospitality of our beautiful Touraine," she
said; then, turning to my
companion, she added: "You will give us the
pleasure of your dining at Clochegourde?"
I threw such a look of
entreaty at Monsieur de Chessel that he began
the preliminaries of accepting the
invitation, though it was given in
a manner that seemed to expect a
refusal. As a man of the world, he
recognized these shades of meaning; but I, a young man without
experience, believed so implicitly in the
sincerity between word and
thought of this beautiful woman that I was
wholly astonished when my
host said to me, after we reached home that evening, "I stayed because
I saw you were dying to do so; but if you do not succeed in making it
all right, I may find myself on bad terms with my neighbors." That
expression, "if you do not make it all right," made me
ponder the
matter deeply. In other words, if I pleased Madame de Mortsauf, she
would not be
displeased with the man who introduced me to her. He
evidently thought I had the power to please her; this in itself gave
me that power, and corroborated my
inward hope at a moment when it
needed some
outward succor.
"I am afraid it will be difficult," he began; "Madame de Chessel
expects us."
"She has you every day," replied the
countess; "besides, we can send
her word. Is she alone?"
"No, the Abbe de Quelus is there."
"Well, then," she said, rising to ring the bell, "you really must dine
with us."
This time Monsieur de Chessel thought her in
earnest, and gave me a
congratulatory look. As soon as I was sure of passing a whole evening
under that roof I seemed to have
eternity before me. For many
miserable beings to-morrow is a word without meaning, and I was of the
number who had no faith in it; when I was certain of a few hours of
happiness I made them
contain a whole
lifetime of delight.
Madame de Mortsauf talked about local affairs, the
harvest, the
vintage, and other matters to which I was a total stranger. This
usually argues either a want of
breeding or great
contempt for the
stranger present who is thus shut out from the conversation, but in
this case it was
embarrassment. Though at first I thought she treated
me as a child and I envied the man of thirty to whom she talked of
serious matters which I could not
comprehend, I came, a few months
later, to understand how
significant a woman's silence often is, and
how many thoughts a voluble conversation masks. At first I attempted
to be at my ease and take part in it, then I perceived the advantages
of my situation and gave myself up to the charm of listening to Madame
de Mortsauf's voice. The
breath of her soul rose and fell among the
syllables as sound is divided by the notes of a flute; it died away to
the ear as it quickened the pulsation of the blood. Her way of
uttering the terminations in "i" was like a bird's song; the "ch" as
she said it was a kiss, but the "t's" were an echo of her heart's
despotism. She thus
extended, without herself
knowing that she did so,
the meaning of her words, leading the soul of the
listener into
regions above this earth. Many a time I have continued a
discussion I
could easily have ended, many a time I have allowed myself to be
unjustly scolded that I might listen to those harmonies of the human
voice, that I might
breathe the air of her soul as it left her lips,
and
strain to my soul that
spoken light as I would fain have
strained
the
speaker to my breast. A swallow's song of joy it was when she was
gay!--but when she spoke of her griefs, a swan's voice
calling to its
mates!
Madame de Mortsauf's inattention to my presence enabled me to examine
her. My eyes rejoiced as they glided over the sweet
speaker; they
kissed her feet, they clasped her waist, they played with the ringlets
of her hair. And yet I was a prey to
terror, as all who, once in their
lives, have
experienced the illimitable joys of a true
passion will
understand. I feared she would
detect me if I let my eyes rest upon
the shoulder I had kissed, and the fear sharpened the
temptation. I
yielded, I looked, my eyes tore away the covering; I saw the mole
which lay where the pretty line between the shoulders started, and
which, ever since the ball, had sparkled in that
twilight which seems
the region of the sleep of youths whose
imagination is
ardent and
whose life is chaste.
I can
sketch for you the leading features which all eyes saw in Madame
de Mortsauf; but no
drawing, however correct, no color, however warm,
can represent her to you. Her face was of those that require the
unattainable artist, whose hand can paint the
reflection of
inwardfires and render that
luminous vapor which defies science and is not
revealable by language--but which a lover sees. Her soft, fair hair
often caused her much
suffering, no doubt through sudden rushes of
blood to the head. Her brow, round and
prominent like that of Joconda,
teemed with unuttered thoughts, re
strained feelings--flowers drowning
in bitter waters. The eyes, of a green tinge flecked with brown, were
always wan; but if her children were in question, or if some keen
condition of joy or
suffering (rare in the lives of all resigned
women) seized her, those eyes sent forth a subtile gleam as if from
fires that were consuming her,--the gleam that wrung the tears from
mine when she covered me with her
contempt, and which sufficed to
lower the boldest
eyelid. A Grecian nose, designed it might be by
Phidias, and united by its double arch to lips that were gracefully
curved, spiritualized the face, which was oval with a skin of the
texture of a white camellia colored with soft rose-tints upon the
cheeks. Her plumpness did not detract from the grace of her figure nor
from the rounded
outlines which made her shape beautiful though well
developed. You will understand the
character of this
perfection when I
say that where the dazzling treasures which had so fascinated me
joined the arm there was no crease or
wrinkle. No hollow disfigured
the base of her head, like those which make the necks of some women
resemble trunks of trees; her muscles were not
harshly defined, and
everywhere the lines were rounded into curves as
fugitive to the eye
as to the pencil. A soft down
faintly showed upon her cheeks and on
the
outline of her
throat, catching the light which made it silken.