indulged in bull-baiting, rat-hunting, and other
ferocioussports. The two lions were kept in a cage under this place;
their roaring might be heard over the whole city, the
inhabitants of which, I am sorry to say, thronged in numbers to
see a poor young lady gobbled up by two wild beasts.
The King took his place in the royal box, having the officers
of his Court around and the Count Hogginarmo by his side, upon
whom His Majesty was observed to look very
fiercely; the fact
is, royal spies had told the
monarch of Hogginarmo's behaviour,
his proposals to Rosalba, and his offer to fight for the crown.
Black as
thunder looked King Padella at this proud noble, as
they sat in the front seats of the theatre
waiting to see the
tragedy
whereof poor Rosalba was to be the heroine.
At length that Princess was brought out in her nightgown, with
all her beautiful hair falling down her back, and looking so
pretty that even the beef-eaters and keepers of the wild
animals wept plentifully at
seeing her. And she walked with
her poor little feet (only luckily the arena was covered with
sawdust), and went and leaned up against a great stone in the
centre of the amphitheatre, round which the Court and the
people were seated in boxes, with bars before them, for fear of
the great,
fierce, red-maned, black-throated, long-tailed,
roaring, bellowing, rushing lions. And now the gates were
opened, and with a wurrawarrurawarar two great lean, hungry,
roaring lions rushed out of their den, where they had been kept
for three weeks on nothing but a little toast-and-water, and
dashed straight up to the stone where poor Rosalba was
waiting.
Commend her to your
patron saints, all you kind people, for she
is in a
dreadful state!
There was a hum and a buzz all through the
circus, and the
fierce King Padella even felt a little
compassion. But Count
Hogginarmo, seated by His Majesty, roared out 'Hurray! Now for
it! Soo-soo-soo!' that
nobleman being uncommonly angry still
at Rosalba's
refusal of him.
But O strange event! O
remarkable circumstance! O
extraordinarycoincidence, which I am sure none of you could BY
ANY POSSIBILITY have divined! When the lions came to Rosalba,
instead of devouring her with their great teeth, it was with
kisses they gobbled her up! They licked her pretty feet, they
nuzzled their noses in her lap, they moo'd, they seemed to say,
'Dear, dear sister don't you
recollect your brothers in the
forest?' And she put her pretty white arms round their tawny
necks, and kissed them.
King Padella was
immensely astonished. The Count Hogginarmo
was
extremely disgusted. 'Pooh!' the Count cried. 'Gammon!'
exclaimed his Lordship.' These lions are tame beasts come from
Wombwell's or Astley's. It is a shame to put people off in
this way. I believe they are little boys dressed up in
door-mats. They are no lions at all.'
'Ha!' said the King, 'you dare to say "gammon" to your
Sovereign, do you? These lions are no lions at all, aren't
they? Ho! my beef-eaters! Ho! my bodyguard! Take this Count
Hogginarmo and fling him into the
circus! Give him a sword and
buckler, let him keep his
armour on, and his weather-eye out,
and fight these lions.'
The
haughty Hogginarmo laid down his opera-glass, and looked
scowling round at the King and his attendants. 'Touch me not,
dogs!' he said, 'or by St. Nicholas the Elder, I will gore you!
Your Majesty thinks Hogginarmo is afraid? No, not of a hundred
thousand lions! Follow me down into the
circus, King Padella,
and match thyself against one of yon brutes. Thou darest not.
Let them both come on, then!' And
opening a
grating of the
box, he jumped
lightly down into the
circus.
WURRA WURRA WURRA WUR-AW-AW-AW!!!
In about two minutes
The Count Hogginarmo was
GOBBLED UP
by
those lions,
bones, boots, and all,
and
There was an
End of him.