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390 BC

THE ECCLESIAZUSAE
by Aristophanes

anonymous translator
CHARACTERS IN THE PLAY

PRAXAGORA
BLEPYRUS, husband of Praxagora

WOMEN
A MAN

CHREMES
A CITIZEN

HERALD
A GIRL

A YOUNG MAN
THREE OLD WOMEN

A SERVANT MAID to PRAXAGORA
CHORUS OF WOMEN

ECCLESIAZUSAE
(SCENE:-The Orchestra represents a public square in Athens; in the

background are two houses with an alley between them.)
PRAXAGORA

(swinging the lantern, which is to be a signal for the other
women; in high tragic style)

Oh! Thou shining light of my earthenware lamp, from this high spot
shalt thou look abroad. Oh! lamp, I will tell thee thine origin and

thy future; 'tis the rapid whirl of the potter's wheel that has lent
thee thy shape, and thy wick counterfeits the glory of the sun;

mayst thou send the agreed signal flashing afar! In thee alone do we
confide, and thou art worthy, for thou art near us when we practise

the various postures in which Aphrodite delights upon our couches, and
none dreams even in the midst of her sports of seeking to avoid

thine eye that watches us. Thou alone shinest into the secret recesses
of our thighs and dost singe the hair that groweth there, and with thy

flame dost light the actions of our loves. If we open some cellar
stored with fruits and wine, thou art our companion, and never dost

thou betray or reveal to a neighbour the secrets thou hast learned
about us. Therefore thou shalt know likewise the whole of the plot

that I have planned with my friends, the women, at the festival of the
Scirophoria.

(She pauses and looks about her.)
I see none of those I was expecting, though dawn approaches; the

Assembly is about to gather and we must take our seats in spite of
Phyromachus, who forsooth would say, "It is meet the women sit apart

and hidden from the eyes of the men." Why, have they not been able
then to procure the false beards that they must wear, or to steal

their husbands' cloaks? Ah! I see a light approaching; let us draw
somewhat aside, for fear it should be a man.

(She hides in the alley. From the right a woman enters, followed
almost immediately by others. All are carrying staffs, men's

sandals, and cloaks over their arms.)
FIRST WOMAN

Let us start, it is high time; as we left our dwellings, the
cock was crowing for the second time.

PRAXAGORA (to herself)
And I have spent the whole night waiting for you. (She emerges

from the alley.) But come, let us call our neighbour by scratching
at her door; and gently too, so that her husband may hear nothing.

SECOND WOMAN
(coming out of her house; she is dressed like a man, with a staff

in her hand)
I was putting on my shoes, when I heard you scratching, for I

was not asleep, so there! Oh! my dear, my husband (he is a Salaminian)
never left me an instant's peace, but was at me, for ever at me, all

night long, so that it was only just now that I was able to filch
his cloak.

PRAXAGORA
I see Clinarete coming too, along with Sostrate and their

next-door neighbour Philaenete. (To the women that are just
arriving; in a loud voice) Hurry yourselves then, for Glyce has

sworn that the last comer shall forfeit three measures of wine and a
choenix of pease.

SECOND WOMAN
Don't you see Melistice, the wife of Smicythion, hurrying hither

in her big shoes? I think she is the only one of us all who has had no
trouble in getting rid of her husband.

FIRST WOMAN
And can't you see Geusistrate, the tavern-keeper's wife, with a

lamp in her hand?
PRAXAGORA

And the wives of Philodoretus and Chaeretades, and a great many
others; all the useful people in the city, in fact.

THIRD WOMAN
Oh! my dear, I have had such trouble in getting away! My husband

ate such a surfeit of sprats last evening that he was coughing and
choking the whole night long.

PRAXAGORA
Take your seats, and, since you are all gathered here at last, let

us see if what we decided on at the feast of the Scirophoria has
been duly done.

FIRST WOMAN
Yes. Firstly, as agreed, I have let the hair under my armpits grow

thicker than a bush; furthermore, whilst my husband was at the
Assembly, I rubbed myself from head to foot with oil and then stood

the whole day long in the sun.
SECOND WOMAN

So did I. I began by throwing away my razor, so that I might get
quite hairy, and no longer resemble a woman.

PRAXAGORA
Have you the beards that we had all to get ourselves for the

Assembly?
FIRST WOMAN

Yea, by Hecate! Is this not a fine one?
SECOND WOMAN

Aye, much finer even than the one Epicrates has.
PRAXAGORA (to the other women)

And you?
FIRST WOMAN

Yes, yes; look, they all nod assent.
PRAXAGORA

I see that you have got all the rest too, Spartan shoes, staffs
and men's cloaks, as it was arranged.

FIRST WOMAN
I have brought Lamias' club, which I stole from him while he

slept.
PRAXAGORA

What, the club that makes him fart with its weight?
SECOND WOMAN

By Zeus the Deliverer, if he had the skin of Argus, he would
know better than any other how to shepherd the popular herd.

PRAXAGORA
But come, let us finish what has yet to be done, while the stars

are still shining; the Assembly, at which we mean to be present,
will open at dawn.

FIRST WOMAN
Good; you must take up your place at the foot of the platform

and facing the Prytanes.
SECOND WOMAN

I have brought this with me to card during the Assembly.
(She shows some wool.)

PRAXAGORA
During the Assembly, wretched woman?

SECOND WOMAN
Surely, by Artemis! shall I hear any less well if I am doing a bit

of carding? My little ones are all but naked.
PRAXAGORA

Think of her wanting to card! whereas we must not let anyone see
the smallest part of our bodies. 'Twould be a fine thing if one of us,

in the midst of the discussion, rushed on to the speaker's platform
and, flinging her cloak aside, showed her Phormisius. If, on the other

hand, we are the first to take our seats closely muffled in our
cloaks, none will know us. Let us fix these beards on our chins, so

that they spread all over our bosoms. How can we fail then to be
mistaken for men? Agyrrhius has deceived everyone, thanks to the beard

of Pronomus; yet he was no better than a woman, and you see how he now
holds the first position in the city. Thus, I adjure you by this day

that is about to dawn, let us dare to copy him and let us be clever
enough to possess ourselves of the management of affairs. Let us

save the ship of state, which just at present none seems able either
to sail or row.

FIRST WOMAN (in a tragic style)
But where shall we find orators in an Assembly of women?

PRAXAGORA
Nothing simpler. Is it not said that the cleverest speakers are

those who get made love to most often? Well, thanks to the gods, we
are that by nature.

FIRST WOMAN
There's no doubt of that; but the worst of it is our inexperience.

PRAXAGORA
That's the very reason we are gathered here, in order to prepare

the speech we must make in the Assembly. Hasten, therefore, all you
who know aught of speaking, to fix on your beards.

SECOND WOMAN
Oh you stupid thing! is there ever a one among us cannot use her

tongue?
PRAXAGORA

Come, look sharp, on with your beard and become a man. As for
me, I will do the same in case I should have a fancy for getting on to

the platform. Here are the chaplets.
(They all put on their beards.)

SECOND WOMAN
Oh! great gods! my dear Praxagora, do look here! Is it not

laughable?
PRAXAGORA

How laughable?
SECOND WOMAN

Our beards look like broiled cuttle-fishes.
PRAXAGORA (pretending to be the herald)

Priest, bring in the cat. Step forward, please Silence,
Ariphrades! Come and take your seat. Now, who wishes to speak?

SECOND WOMAN
I do.

PRAXAGORA
Then put on this chaplet and success be with you.

SECOND WOMAN
There!

PRAXAGORA
Well then I begin.

SECOND WOMAN
Before drinking?

PRAXAGORA
Hah! she wants to drink!

SECOND WOMAN
Why, what else is the meaning of this chaplet?

PRAXAGORA
Get you hence! you would probably have played us this trick also

before the people.
SECOND WOMAN

Well! don't the men drink then in the Assembly?
PRAXAGORA

Now she's telling us the men drink!
SECOND WOMAN



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