CHAPTER II
n a firm, though
cautious tone, Elinor thus began.
"I should be undeserving of the confidence you have
honoured me with, if I felt no desire for its
continuance, or no
farther curiosity on its subject. I will not apologize therefore for
bringing it forward again."
"Thank you," cried Lucy warmly, "for breaking the ice; you
have set my heart at ease by it; for I was somehow or other afraid I
had offended you by what I told you that Monday."
"Offended me! How could you suppose so? Believe me," and
Elinor spoke it with the truest
sincerity, "nothing could be farther
from my intention than to give you such an idea. Could you have a
motive for the trust, that was not honourable and
flattering to
me?"
"And yet I do assure you," replied Lucy, her little sharp eyes
full of meaning, "there seemed to me to be a coldness and
displeasure in your manner that made me quite
uncomfortable. I
felt sure that you was angry with me; and have been quarrelling
with myself ever since, for having took such a liberty as to trouble
you with my affairs. But I am very glad to find it was only my own
fancy, and that you really do not blame me. If you knew what a
consolation it was to me to relieve my heart
speaking to you of
what I am always thinking of every moment of my life, your
compassion would make you overlook every thing else I am sure."
"Indeed, I can easily believe that it was a very great relief to
you, to acknowledge your situation to me, and be
assured that you
shall never have reason to
repent it. Your case is a very
unfortunate one; you seem to me to be surrounded with
difficulties, and you will have need of all your
mutual affection to
support you under them. Mr. Ferrars, I believe, is entirely
dependent on his mother."
"He has only two thousand pounds of his own; it would be
madness to marry upon that, though for my own part, I could give
up every prospect of more without a sigh. I have been always used
to a very small income, and could struggle with any poverty for
him; but I love him too well to be the selfish means of robbing him,
perhaps, of all that his mother might give him if he married to
please her. We must wait, it may be for many years. With almost
every other man in the world, it would be an alarming prospect;
but Edward's affection and
constancy nothing can
deprive me of I
know."
"That conviction must be every thing to you; and he is
undoubtedly supported by the same trust in your's. If the strength
of your reciprocal
attachment had failed, as between many people,
and under many circumstances it naturally would during a four
years' engagement, your situation would have been pitiable
indeed."
Lucy here looked up; but Elinor was careful in guarding her
countenance from every expression that could give her words a
suspicious tendency.
"Edward's love for me," said Lucy, "has been pretty well put to
the test, by our long, very long absence since we were first
engaged, and it has stood the trial so well, that I should be
unpardonable to doubt it now. I can safely say that he has never
gave me one moment's alarm on that account from the first."
Elinor hardly knew whether to smile or sigh at this
assertion.
Lucy went on. "I am rather of a jealous temper too by nature,
and from our different situations in life, from his being so much
more in the world than me, and our
continualseparation, I was
enough inclined for suspicion, to have found out the truth in an
instant, if there had been the slightest
alteration in his behaviour
to me when we met, or any lowness of spirits that I could not
account for, or if he had talked more of one lady than another, or
seemed in any respect less happy at Longstaple than he used to
be. I do not mean to say that I am particularly observant or quick-
sighted in general, but in such a case I am sure I could not be
deceived."
"All this," thought Elinor, "is very pretty; but it can impose
upon neither of us."
"But what," said she after a short silence, "are your views? or
have you none but that of waiting for Mrs. Ferrars's death, which
is a
melancholy and
shocking extremity?―Is her son determined
to submit to this, and to all the tediousness of the many years of
suspense in which it may involve you, rather than run the risk of
her
displeasure for a while by owning the truth?"
"If we could be certain that it would be only for a while! But
Mrs. Ferrars is a very headstrong proud woman, and in her first fit
of anger upon
hearing it, would very likely secure every thing to
Robert, and the idea of that, for Edward's sake, frightens away all
my
inclination for hasty measures."
"And for your own sake too, or you are carrying your
disinterestedness beyond reason."
Lucy looked at Elinor again, and was silent.
"Do you know Mr. Robert Ferrars?" asked Elinor.
"Not at all―I never saw him; but I fancy he is very unlike his
brother―silly and a great coxcomb."
"A great coxcomb!"
repeated Miss Steele, whose ear had caught
those words by a sudden pause in Marianne's music.―"Oh, they
are talking of their favourite beaux, I dare say."
"No sister," cried Lucy, "you are
mistaken there, our favourite
beaux are not great coxcombs."
"I can answer for it that Miss Dashwood's is not," said Mrs.
Jennings, laughing
heartily; "for he is one of the modestest,
prettiest behaved young men I ever saw; but as for Lucy, she is
such a sly little creature, there is no
finding out who she likes."
"Oh," cried Miss Steele, looking significantly round at them, "I
dare say Lucy's beau is quite as modest and pretty behaved as
Miss Dashwood's."
Elinor blushed in spite of herself. Lucy bit her lip, and looked
angrily at her sister. A
mutual silence took place for some time.
Lucy first put an end to it by
saying in a lower tone, though
Marianne was then giving them the powerful protection of a very
magnificent concerto―
"I will honestly tell you of one scheme which has lately come
into my head, for bringing matters to bear; indeed I am bound to
let you into the secret, for you are a party
concerned. I dare say
you have seen enough of Edward to know that he would prefer the
church to every other profession; now my plan is that he should
take orders as soon as he can, and then through your interest,
which I am sure you would be kind enough to use out of friendship
for him, and I hope out of some regard to me, your brother might
be persuaded to give him Norland living; which I understand is a
very good one, and the present incumbent not likely to live a great
while. That would be enough for us to marry upon, and we might
trust to time and chance for the rest."
"I should always be happy," replied Elinor, "to show any mark
of my
esteem and friendship for Mr. Ferrars; but do not you
perceive that my interest on such an occasion would be
perfectlyunnecessary? He is brother to Mrs. John Dashwood―that must be
recommendation enough to her husband."
"But Mrs. John Dashwood would not much approve of
Edward's going into orders."
"Then I rather suspect that my interest would do very little."
They were again silent for many minutes. At length Lucy
exclaimed with a deep sigh,
"I believe it would be the wisest way to put an end to the
business at once by dissolving the engagement. We seem so beset
with difficulties on every side, that though it would make us
miserable for a time, we should be happier perhaps in the end.
But you will not give me your advice, Miss Dashwood?"
"No," answered Elinor, with a smile, which concealed very
agitated feelings, "on such a subject I certainly will not. You know
very well that my opinion would have no weight with you, unless it
were on the side of your wishes."
"Indeed you wrong me," replied Lucy, with great
solemnity; "I
know nobody of whose judgment I think so highly as I do of yours;
and I do really believe, that if you was to say to me, 'I advise you
by all means to put an end to your engagement with Edward
Ferrars, it will be more for the happiness of both of you,' I should
resolve upon doing it immediately."
Elinor blushed for the in
sincerity of Edward's future wife, and
replied, "This
compliment would
effectually frighten me from
giving any opinion on the subject had I formed one. It raises my
influence much too high; the power of dividing two people so
tenderly attached is too much for an
indifferent person."
"'Tis because you are an
indifferent person," said Lucy, with
some pique, and laying a particular stress on those words, "that
your judgment might
justly have such weight with me. If you could
be supposed to be biased in any respect by your own feelings, your
opinion would not be worth having."
Elinor thought it wisest to make no answer to this, lest they
might
provoke each other to an unsuitable increase of ease and
unreserve; and was even partly determined never to mention the
subject again. Another pause therefore of many minutes'
duration,
succeeded this speech, and Lucy was still the first to end it.
"Shall you be in town this winter, Miss Dashwood?" said she
with all her accustomary complacency.
"Certainly not."
"I am sorry for that," returned the other, while her eyes
brightened at the information, "it would have gave me such
pleasure to meet you there! But I dare say you will go for all that.
To be sure, your brother and sister will ask you to come to them."
"It will not be in my power to accept their invitation if they do."
"How
unlucky that is! I had quite depended upon meeting you
there. Anne and me are to go the latter end of January to some
relations who have been
wanting us to visit them these several
years! But I only go for the sake of
seeing Edward. He will be there
in February, otherwise London would have no charms for me; I
have not spirits for it."
Elinor was soon called to the card-table by the conclusion of the
first rubber, and the
confidentialdiscourse of the two ladies was
therefore at an end, to which both of them submitted without any
reluctance, for nothing had been said on either side to make them
dislike each other less than they had done before; and Elinor sat
down to the card table with the
melancholy persuasion that
Edward was not only without affection for the person who was to
be his wife; but that he had not even the chance of being tolerably
happy in marriage, which sincere affection on her side would have
given, for self-interest alone could induce a woman to keep a man
to an engagement, of which she seemed so thoroughly aware that
he was weary.
From this time the subject was never revived by Elinor, and
when entered on by Lucy, who seldom missed an opportunity of
introducing it, and was particularly careful to inform her
confidante, of her happiness whenever she received a letter from
Edward, it was treated by the former with
calmness and
caution,
and dismissed as soon as
civility would allow; for she felt such
conversations to be an
indulgence which Lucy did not deserve,
and which were dangerous to herself.
The visit of the Miss Steeles at Barton Park was lengthened far
beyond what the first invitation implied. Their favour increased;
they could not be spared; Sir John would not hear of their going;
and in spite of their numerous and long arranged engagements in
Exeter, in spite of the absolute necessity of returning to fulfil them
immediately, which was in full force at the end of every week, they
were prevailed on to stay nearly two months at the park, and to
assist in the due
celebration of that
festival which requires a more
than ordinary share of private balls and large dinners to proclaim
its importance.
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