needed for your studies. Ah! my dear Eugene, believe your mother,
crooked ways cannot lead to great ends. Patience and endurance
are the two qualities most needed in your position. I am not
scolding you; I do not want any tinge of
bitterness to spoil our
offering. I am only talking like a mother whose trust in you is
as great as her
foresight for you. You know the steps that you
must take, and I, for my part, know the
purity of heart, and how
good your intentions are; so I can say to you without a doubt,
'Go forward, beloved!' If I tremble, it is because I am a mother,
but my prayers and blessings will be with you at every step. Be
very careful, dear boy. You must have a man's
prudence, for it
lies with you to shape the destinies of five others who are dear
to you, and must look to you. Yes, our fortunes depend upon you,
and your success is ours. We all pray to God to be with you in
all that you do. Your aunt Marcillac has been most
generousbeyond words in this matter; she saw at once how it was, even
down to your gloves. 'But I have a
weakness for the
eldest!' she
said gaily. You must love your aunt very much, dear Eugene. I
shall wait till you have succeeded before telling you all that
she has done for you, or her money would burn your fingers. You,
who are young, do not know what it is to part with something that
is a piece of your past! But what would we not sacrifice for your
sakes? Your aunt says that I am to send you a kiss on the
forehead from her, and that kiss is to bring you luck again and
again, she says. She would have written you herself, the dear
kind-hearted woman, but she is troubled with the gout in her
fingers just now. Your father is very well. The vintage of 1819
has turned out better than we expected. Good-bye, dear boy; I
will say nothing about your sisters, because Laure is
writing to
you, and I must let her have the pleasure of giving you all the
home news. Heaven send that you may succeed! Oh! yes, dear
Eugene, you must succeed. I have come, through you, to a
knowledge of a pain so sharp that I do not think I could endure
it a second time. I have come to know what it is to be poor, and
to long for money for my children's sake. There, good-bye! Do not
leave us for long without news of you; and here, at the last,
take a kiss from your mother."
By the time Eugene had finished the letter he was in tears. He
thought of Father Goriot crushing his silver keepsake into a
shapeless mass before he sold it to meet his daughter's bill of
exchange.
"Your mother has broken up her jewels for you," he said to
himself; "your aunt shed tears over those relics of hers before
she sold them for your sake. What right have you to heap
execrations on Anastasie? You have followed her example; you have
selfishly sacrificed others to your own future, and she
sacrifices her father to her lover; and of you two, which is the
worse?"
He was ready to
renounce his attempts; he could not bear to take
that money. The fires of
remorse burned in his heart, and gave
him
intolerable pain, the
generous secret
remorse which men
seldom take into
account when they sit in judgment upon their
fellow-men; but perhaps the angels in heaven, beholding it,
pardon the
criminal whom our justice condemns. Rastignac opened
his sister's letter; its
simplicity and kindness revived his
heart.
"Your letter came just at the right time, dear brother. Agathe
and I had thought of so many different ways of spending our
money, that we did not know what to buy with it; and now you have
come in, and, like the servant who upset all the watches that
belonged to the King of Spain, you have restored
harmony; for,
really and truly, we did not know which of all the things we
wanted we wanted most, and we were always quarreling about it,
never thinking, dear Eugene, of a way of spending our money which
would satisfy us completely. Agathe jumped for you. Indeed, we
have been like two mad things all day, 'to such a prodigious
degree' (as aunt would say), that mother said, with her severe
expression, 'Whatever can be the matter with you,
mesdemoiselles?' I think if we had been scolded a little, we
should have been still better pleased. A woman ought to be very
glad to suffer for one she loves! I, however, in my inmost soul,