he couldn't make out for the life of him what the Mole had done
that was so particularly clever; but,
fortunately for him, before
he could show
temper or
expose himself to the Badger's sarcasm,
the bell rang for luncheon.
It was a simple but sustaining meal--bacon and broad beans, and a
macaroni
pudding; and when they had quite done, the Badger
settled himself into an arm-chair, and said, `Well, we've got our
work cut out for us to-night, and it will probably be pretty late
before we're quite through with it; so I'm just going to take
forty winks, while I can.' And he drew a
handkerchief over his
face and was soon snoring.
The
anxious and
laborious Rat at once resumed his preparations,
and started
running between his four little heaps, muttering,
`Here's-a-belt-for-the-Rat, here's-a-belt-for-the Mole, here's-a-
belt-for-the-Toad, here's-a-belt-for-the-Badger!' and so on, with
every fresh accoutrement he produced, to which there seemed
really no end; so the Mole drew his arm through Toad's, led him
out into the open air, shoved him into a wicker chair, and made
him tell him all his adventures from
beginning to end, which
Toad was only too
willing to do. The Mole was a good listener,
and Toad, with no one to check his statements or to
criticise in
an unfriendly spirit, rather let himself go. Indeed, much that
he
related belonged more
properly to the
category of what-might-
have-happened-had-I-only-thought-of-it-in-time-instead-of-ten-
minutes-afterwards. Those are always the best and the raciest
adventures; and why should they not be truly ours, as much as the
somewhat inadequate things that really come off?
XII
THE RETURN OF ULYSSES
When it began to grow dark, the Rat, with an air of excitement
and
mystery, summoned them back into the parlour, stood each of
them up
alongside of his little heap, and proceeded to dress them
up for the coming
expedition. He was very
earnest and
thoroughgoing about it, and the affair took quite a long time.
First, there was a belt to go round each animal, and then a sword
to be stuck into each belt, and then a cutlass on the other side
to balance it. Then a pair of
pistols, a policeman's truncheon,
several sets of handcuffs, some bandages and sticking-plaster,
and a flask and a sandwich-case. The Badger laughed good-
humouredly and said, `All right, Ratty! It amuses you and it
doesn't hurt me. I'm going to do all I've got to do with this
here stick.' But the Rat only said, `PLEASE, Badger.
You know I shouldn't like you to blame me afterwards and say
I had forgotten ANYTHING!'
When all was quite ready, the Badger took a dark
lantern in one
paw, grasped his great stick with the other, and said, `Now then,
follow me! Mole first, `cos I'm very pleased with him; Rat next;
Toad last. And look here, Toady! Don't you
chatter so much as
usual, or you'll be sent back, as sure as fate!'
The Toad was so
anxious not to be left out that he took up the
inferior position assigned to him without a murmur, and the
animals set off. The Badger led them along by the river for a
little way, and then suddenly swung himself over the edge into a
hole in the river-bank, a little above the water. The Mole and
the Rat followed
silently, swinging themselves
successfully into
the hole as they had seen the Badger do; but when it came to
Toad's turn, of course he managed to slip and fall into the water
with a loud
splash and a
squeal of alarm. He was hauled out by
his friends, rubbed down and wrung out
hastily, comforted, and
set on his legs; but the Badger was
seriously angry, and told him
that the very next time he made a fool of himself he would
most certainly be left behind.
So at last they were in the secret passage, and the cutting-out
expedition had really begun!
It was cold, and dark, and damp, and low, and narrow, and poor
Toad began to
shiver,
partly from dread of what might be before
him,
partly because he was wet through. The
lantern was far
ahead, and he could not help lagging behind a little in the
darkness. Then he heard the Rat call out warningly, `COME on,
Toad!' and a
terror seized him of being left behind, alone in the
darkness, and he `came on' with such a rush that he upset the Rat
into the Mole and the Mole into the Badger, and for a moment all
was
confusion. The Badger thought they were being attacked from
behind, and, as there was no room to use a stick or a cutlass,
drew a
pistol, and was on the point of putting a
bullet into
Toad. When he found out what had really happened he was very
angry indeed, and said, `Now this time that
tiresome Toad