the machine stopped dead. He was
trying to think what he did with
his right leg
whilst getting off. He gripped the handles and
released the brake,
standing on the left pedal and waving his
right foot in the air. Then--these things take so long in the
telling--he found the machine was falling over to the right.
While he was deciding upon a plan of action,
gravitation appears
to have been busy. He was still irresolute when he found the
machine on the ground, himself kneeling upon it, and a vague
feeling in his mind that again Providence had dealt
harshly with
his shin. This happened when he was just level with the
heath
keeper. The man in the approaching cart stood up to see the
ruins better.
"THAT ain't the way to get off," said the heath
keeper.
Mr. Hoopdriver picked up the machine. The handle was twisted
askew again He said something under his
breath. He would have to
unscrew the
beastly thing.
"THAT ain't the way to get off,"
repeated the heath
keeper, after
a silence.
"_I_ know that," said Mr. Hoopdriver, testily, determined to
overlook the new
specimen on his shin at any cost. He unbuckled
the
wallet behind the
saddle, to get out a screw
hammer.
"If you know it ain't the way to get off--whaddyer do it for?"
said the heath-
keeper, in a tone of friendly controversy.
Mr. Hoopdriver got out his screw
hammer and went to the handle.
He was annoyed. "That's my business, I suppose," he said,
fumbling with the screw. The
unusualexertion had made his hands
shake frightfully.
The heath-
keeper became meditative, and twisted his stick in his
hands behind his back. "You've broken yer 'andle, ain't yer?" he
said
presently. Just then the screw
hammer slipped off the nut.
Mr. Hoopdriver used a nasty, low word.
"They're
trying things, them bicycles," said the heath-
keeper,
charitably. "Very
trying." Mr. Hoopdriver gave the nut a vicious
turn and suddenly stood up--he was
holding the front wheel
between his knees. "I wish," said he, with a catch in his voice,
"I wish you'd leave off staring at me."
Then with the air of one who has delivered an ultimatum, he began
replacing the screw
hammer in the
wallet.
The heath-
keeper never moved. Possibly he raised his eyebrows,
and certainly he stared harder than he did before. "You're pretty
unsociable," he said slowly, as Mr. Hoopdriver seized the handles
and stood ready to mount as soon as the cart had passed.
The
indignation gathered slowly but surely. "Why don't you ride
on a private road of your own if no one ain't to speak to you?"
asked the heath-
keeper, perceiving more and more clearly the
bearing of the matter. "Can't no one make a passin' remark to
you, Touchy? Ain't I good enough to speak to you? Been struck
wooden all of a sudden?"
Mr. Hoopdriver stared into the Immensity of the Future. He was
rigid with
emotion. It was like abusing the Lions in Trafalgar
Square. But the heath
keeper felt his honour was at stake.
"Don't you make no remarks to 'IM," said the
keeper as the carter
came up broadside to them. "'E's a bloomin' dook, 'e is. 'E don't
converse with no one under a earl. 'E's off to Windsor, 'e is;
that's why 'e's stickin' his be'ind out so
haughty. Pride! Why,
'e's got so much of it, 'e has to carry some of it in that there
bundle there, for fear 'e'd bust if 'e didn't ease hisself a bit-
-'E--"
But Mr. Hoopdriver heard no more. He was hopping
vigorously along
the road, in a spasmodic attempt to remount.He missed the treadle
once and swore viciously, to the
keeper's
immense delight. "Nar!
Nar!" said the heath-
keeper.
In another moment Mr. Hoopdriver was up, and after one terrific
lurch of the machine, the heath
keeper dropped out of earshot.
Mr. Hoopdriver would have liked to look back at his enemy, but he
usually twisted round and upset if he tried that.
He had to imagine the
indignant heath-
keeper telling the carter
all about it. He tried to infuse as much
disdain aspossible into
his retreating aspect.
He drove on his sinuous way down the dip by the new mere and up
the little rise to the crest of the hill that drops into Kingston
Vale; and so
remarkable is the
psychology of cycling, that he
rode all the straighter and easier because the
emotions the
heath
keeper had aroused relieved his mind of the
constant