spoke for your advantage."
"My dear friend," he cried, "I know I might have relied upon the
generosity of your character."
"Man! will you let me speak?" said I. "The fact is that I cannot win
to find out if you are rich or poor. But it is my idea that your
means, as they are
mysterious in their source, so they are something
insufficient in
amount; and I do not choose your daughter to be
lacking. If I durst speak to herself, you may be certain I would never
dream of
trusting it to you; because I know you like the back of my
hand, and all your blustering talk is that much wind to me. However, I
believe in your way you do still care something for your daughter after
all; and I must just be doing with that ground of confidence, such as
it is."
Whereupon, I arranged with him that he was to
communicate with me, as
to his
whereabouts and Catriona's
welfare, in
consideration of which I
was to serve him a small stipend.
He heard the business out with a great deal of
eagerness; and when it
was done, "My dear fellow, my dear son," he cried out, "this is more
like yourself than any of it yet! I will serve you with a soldier's
faithfulness - "
"Let me hear no more of it!" says I. "You have got me to that pitch
that the bare name of soldier rises on my
stomach. Our
traffic is
settled; I am now going forth and will return in one
half-hour, when I
expect to find my
chambers purged of you."
I gave them good
measure of time; it was my one fear that I might see
Catriona again, because tears and
weakness were ready in my heart, and
I cherished my anger like a piece of
dignity. Perhaps an hour went by;
the sun had gone down, a little wisp of a new moon was following it
across a
scarletsunset; already there were stars in the east, and in
my
chambers, when at last I entered them, the night lay blue. I lit a
taper and reviewed the rooms; in the first there remained nothing so
much as to awake a memory of those who were gone; but in the second, in
a corner of the floor, I spied a little heap that brought my heart into
my mouth. She had left behind at her
departure all that she had ever
had of me. It was the blow that I felt sorest, perhaps because it was
the last; and I fell upon that pile of clothing and behaved myself more
foolish than I care to tell of.
Late in the night, in a
strict frost, and my teeth chattering, I came
again by some
portion of my
manhood and considered with myself. The
sight of these poor frocks and ribbons, and her shifts, and the clocked
stockings, was not to be
endured; and if I were to recover any
constancy of mind, I saw I must be rid of them ere the morning. It was
my first thought to have made a fire and burned them; but my
disposition has always been opposed to wastery, for one thing; and for
another, to have burned these things that she had worn so close upon
her body seemed in the nature of a
cruelty. There was a corner
cupboard in that
chamber; there I determined to
bestow them. The which
I did and made it a long business, folding them with very little skill
indeed but the more care; and sometimes dropping them with my tears.
All the heart was gone out of me, I was weary as though I had run
miles, and sore like one
beaten; when, as I was folding a
kerchief that
she wore often at her neck, I observed there was a corner neatly cut
from it. It was a
kerchief of a very pretty hue, on which I had
frequently remarked; and once that she had it on, I remembered telling
her (by way of a banter) that she wore my colours. There came a glow
of hope and like a tide of
sweetness in my bosom; and the next moment I
was plunged back in a fresh
despair. For there was the corner crumpled
in a knot and cast down by itself in another part of the floor.
But when I argued with myself, I grew more
hopeful. She had cut that
corner off in some
childish freak that was
manifestly tender; that she
had cast it away again was little to he wondered at; and I was inclined
to dwell more upon the first than upon the second, and to be more
pleased that she had ever conceived the idea of that keepsake, than
concerned because she had flung it from her in an hour of natural
resentment.
CHAPTER XXIX - WE MEET IN DUNKIRK.
ALTOGETHER, then, I was scare so
miserable the next days but what I had
many
hopeful and happy snatches; threw myself with a good deal of
constancy upon my studies; and made out to
endure the time till Alan
should arrive, or I might hear word of Catriona by the means of James
More. I had
altogether three letters in the time of our separation.
One was to announce their
arrival in the town of Dunkirk in France,
from which place James
shortly after started alone upon a private
mission. This was to England and to see Lord Holderness; and it has
always been a bitter thought that my good money helped to pay the
charges of the same. But he has need of a long spoon who soups with
the de'il, or James More either. During this
absence, the time was to
fall due for another letter; and as the letter was the condition of his
stipend, he had been so careful as to prepare it
beforehand and leave
it with Catriona to be despatched. The fact of our correspondence
aroused her suspicions, and he was no sooner gone than she had burst
the seal. What I received began
accordingly in the
writing of James
More:
"My dear Sir, - Your esteemed favour came to hand duly, and I have to
acknowledge the inclosure according to
agreement. It shall be all
faithfully expended on my daughter, who is well, and desires to be
remembered to her dear friend. I find her in rather a melancholy
disposition, but trust in the mercy of God to see her re-established.
Our manner of life is very much alone, but we
solace ourselves with the
melancholy tunes of our native mountains, and by walking up the margin
of the sea that lies next to Scotland. It was better days with me when
I lay with five wounds upon my body on the field of Gladsmuir. I have
found
employment here in the HARAS of a French
nobleman, where my
experience is valued. But, my dear Sir, the wages are so exceedingly
unsuitable that I would be
ashamed to mention them, which makes your
remittances the more necessary to my daughter's comfort, though I
daresay the sight of old friends would be still better.
"My dear Sir,
"Your
affectionate,
obedient servant,
"JAMES MACGREGOR DRUMMOND."
Below it began again in the hand of Catriona:-
"Do not be believing him, it is all lies together, - C. M. D."
Not only did she add this
postscript, but I think she must have come
near suppressing the letter; for it came long after date, and was
closely followed by the third. In the time betwixt them, Alan had
arrived, and made another life to me with his merry conversation; I had
been presented to his cousin of the Scots-Dutch, a man that drank more
than I could have thought possible and was not
otherwise of interest; I
had been entertained to many jovial dinners and given some myself, all
with no great change upon my sorrow; and we two (by which I mean Alan
and myself, and not at all the cousin) had discussed a good deal the
nature of my relations with James More and his daughter. I was
naturally diffident to give particulars; and this
disposition was not
anyway lessened by the nature of Alan's
commentary upon those I gave.
"I cannae make heed nor tail of it," he would say, "but it sticks in my
mind ye've made a gowk of yourself. There's few people that has had
more experience than Alan Breck: and I can never call to mind to have
heard tell of a lassie like this one of yours. The way that you tell
it, the thing's fair impossible. Ye must have made a terrible hash of
the business, David."
"There are whiles that I am of the same mind," said I.
"The strange thing is that ye seem to have a kind of fancy for her
too!" said Alan.
"The biggest kind, Alan," said I, "and I think I'll take it to my grave
with me."
"Well, ye beat me, whatever!" he would conclude.