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A Sentimental Journey-Part18_Laurence Sterne(1713-1768)_English Literature(文学名著)-第2页

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lively a French girl as ever moved. - There were difficulties every

way, - and the obstacle of the stone in the road, which brought us



into the distress, great as it appeared whilst the peasants were

removing it, was but a pebble to what lay in our ways now. - I have



only to add, that it did not lessen the weight which hung upon our

spirits, that we were both too delicate to communicate what we felt



to each other upon the occasion.

We sat down to supper; and had we not had more generous wine to it



than a little inn in Savoy could have furnish'd, our tongues had

been tied up, till necessity herself had set them at liberty; - but



the lady having a few bottles of Burgundy in her voiture, sent down

her fille de chambre for a couple of them; so that by the time



supper was over, and we were left alone, we felt ourselves inspired

with a strength of mind sufficient to talk, at least, without



reserve upon our situation. We turn'd it every way, and debated

and considered it in all kinds of lights in the course of a two



hours' negotiation; at the end of which the articles were settled

finally betwixt us, and stipulated for in form and manner of a



treaty of peace, - and I believe with as much religion and good

faith on both sides as in any treaty which has yet had the honour



of being handed down to posterity.

They were as follow: -



First, as the right of the bed-chamber is in Monsieur, - and he

thinking the bed next to the fire to be the warmest, he insists



upon the concession on the lady's side of taking up with it.

Granted, on the part of Madame; with a proviso, That as the



curtains of that bed are of a flimsy transparent cotton, and appear

likewise too scanty to draw close, that the fille de chambre shall



fasten up the opening, either by corking pins, or needle and

thread, in such manner as shall be deem'd a sufficient barrier on



the side of Monsieur.

2dly. It is required on the part of Madame, that Monsieur shall



lie the whole night through in his robe de chambre.

Rejected: inasmuch as Monsieur is not worth a robe de chambre; he



having nothing in his portmanteau but six shirts and a black silk

pair of breeches.



The mentioning the silk pair of breeches made an entire change of

the article, - for the breeches were accepted as an equivalent for



the robe de chambre; and so it was stipulated and agreed upon, that

I should lie in my black silk breeches all night.



3dly. It was insisted upon and stipulated for by the lady, that

after Monsieur was got to bed, and the candle and fire



extinguished, that Monsieur should not speak one single word the

whole night.



Granted; provided Monsieur's saying his prayers might not be deemed

an infraction of the treaty.



There was but one point forgot in this treaty, and that was the

manner in which the lady and myself should be obliged to undress



and get to bed; - there was but one way of doing it, and that I

leave to the reader to devise; protesting as I do it, that if it is



not the most delicate in nature, 'tis the fault of his own

imagination, - against which this is not my first complaint.



Now, when we were got to bed, whether it was the novelty of the

situation, or what it was, I know not; but so it was, I could not



shut my eyes; I tried this side, and that, and turn'd and turn'd

again, till a full hour after midnight; when Nature and patience



both wearing out, - O, my God! said I.

- You have broke the treaty, Monsieur, said the lady, who had no



more slept than myself. - I begg'd a thousand pardons - but

insisted it was no more than an ejaculation. She maintained 'twas



an entire infraction of the treaty - I maintained it was provided

for in the clause of the third article.



The lady would by no means give up her point, though she weaken'd

her barrier by it; for in the warmth of the dispute, I could hear



two or three corking pins fall out of the curtain to the ground.

Upon my word and honour, Madame, said I, - stretching my arm out of



bed by way of asseveration. -

(I was going to have added, that I would not have trespassed



against the remotest idea of decorum for the world); -

But the fille de chambre hearing there were words between us, and



fearing that hostilities would ensue in course, had crept silently




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