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remain the Oracle. The assumption is that they are ministers of

progress. But the mere increase of size is not progress. If it



were, elephantiasis, which causes a man's legs to become as large

as tree-trunks, would be a sort of progress, whereas it is nothing



but a very ugly disease. Yet directly this very disconcerting

catastrophe happened, the servants of the silly Oracle began to



cry: "It's no use! You can't resist progress. The big ship has

come to stay." Well, let her stay on, then, in God's name! But



she isn't a servant of progress in any sense. She is the servant

of commercialism. For progress, if dealing with the problems of a



material world, has some sort of moral aspect--if only, say, that

of conquest, which has its distinct value since man is a conquering



animal. But bigness is mere exaggeration. The men responsible for

these big ships have been moved by considerations of profit to be



made by the questionable means of pandering to an absurd and vulgar

demand for banal luxury--the seaside hotel luxury. One even asks



oneself whether there was such a demand? It is inconceivable to

think that there are people who can't spend five days of their life



without a suite of apartments, cafes, bands, and such-like refined

delights. I suspect that the public is not so very guilty in this



matter. These things were pushed on to it in the usual course of

trade competition. If to-morrow you were to take all these



luxuries away, the public would still travel. I don't despair of

mankind. I believe that if, by some catastrophic miracle all ships



of every kind were to disappear off the face of the waters,

together with the means of replacing them, there would be found,



before the end of the week, men (millionaires, perhaps) cheerfully

putting out to sea in bath-tubs for a fresh start. We are all like



that. This sort of spirit lives in mankind still uncorrupted by

the so-called refinements, the ingenuity of tradesmen, who look



always for something new to sell, offers to the public.

Let her stay,--I mean the big ship--since she has come to stay. I



only object to the attitude of the people, who, having called her

into being and having romanced (to speak politely) about her,



assume a detached sort of superiority, goodness only knows why, and

raise difficulties in the way of every suggestion--difficulties



about boats, about bulkheads, about discipline, about davits, all

sorts of difficulties. To most of them the only answer would be:



"Where there's a will there's a way"--the most wise of proverbs.

But some of these objections are really too stupid for anything. I



shall try to give an instance of what I mean.

This Inquiry is admirably conducted. I am not alluding to the



lawyers representing "various interests," who are trying to earn

their fees by casting all sorts of mean aspersions on the



characters of all sorts of people not a bit worse than themselves.

It is honest to give value for your wages; and the "bravos" of



ancient Venice who kept their stilettos in good order and never

failed to deliver the stab bargained for with their employers,



considered themselves an honest body of professional men, no doubt.

But they don't compel my admiration, whereas the conduct of this



Inquiry does. And as it is pretty certain to be attacked, I take

this opportunity to deposit here my nickel of appreciation. Well,



lately, there came before it witnesses responsible for the

designing of the ship. One of them was asked whether it would not



be advisable to make each coal-bunker of the ship a water-tight

compartment by means of a suitable door.



The answer to such a question should have been, "Certainly," for it

is obvious to the simplest intelligence that the more water-tight



spaces you provide in a ship (consistently with having her

workable) the nearer you approach safety. But instead of admitting



the expediency of the suggestion, this witness at once raised an

objection as to the possibility of closing tightly the door of a



bunker on account of the slope of coal. This with the true




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