No, he did not love the birds. It was
useless to pretend.
Whatever one may say about other birds a
cuckoo is a low
detestable cad of a bird.
Then the
bishop began to be particularly tormented by a bird
that made a short,
insistent, wheezing sound at regular intervals
of perhaps twenty seconds. If a bird could have whooping-cough,
that, he thought, was the sort of whoop it would have. But even
if it had whooping-cough he could not pity it. He hung in its
intervals
waiting for the return of the wheeze.
And then that
blackbird reasserted itself. It had a rich
boastful note; it seemed proud of its noisy reiteration of simple
self-assertion. For some obscure reason the
phrase "oleographic
sounds" drifted into the
bishop's thoughts. This bird produced
the
peculiar and irrational
impression that it had recently made
a
considerable sum of money by
shrewd industrialism. It was, he
thought
grimly, a
genuine Princhester
blackbird.
This wickedly uncharitable
reference to his diocese ran all
unchallenged through the
bishop's mind. And others no less wicked
followed it.
Once during his summer holidays in Florence he and Lady Ella
had subscribed to an association for the
protection of
song-birds. He recalled this now with a mild wonder. It seemed to
him that perhaps after all it was as well to let fruit-growers
and Italians deal with singing-birds in their own way. Perhaps
after all they had a wisdom....
He passed his hands over his face. The world after all is not
made entirely for singing-birds; there is such a thing as
proportion. Singing-birds may become a
luxury, an
indulgence, an
excess.
Did the birds eat the fruit in Paradise?
Perhaps there they worked for some
collectivemusical effect,
had some sort of
conductor in the place of this--hullabaloo....
He
decided to walk about the room for a time and then remake
his bed....
The
sunrise found the
bishop with his head and shoulders out of
the window
trying to see that
blackbird. He just wanted to look
at it. He was persuaded it was a quite
exceptionalblackbird.
Again came that
oppressive sense of the futility of the
contemporary church, but this time it came in the most grotesque
form. For
hanging half out of the
casement he was suddenly
reminded of St. Francis of Assisi, and how at his
rebuke the
wheeling
swallow stilled their cries.
But it was all so different then.
(3)
It was only after he had passed four similar nights, with
intervening days of lassitude and afternoon siestas, that the
bishop realized that he was in the grip of insomnia.
He did not go at once to a doctor, but he told his trouble to
every one he met and received much tentative advice. He had meant
to have his talk with Eleanor on the morning next after their
conversation in the dining-room, but his
bodily and
spiritualanaemia prevented him.
The fifth night was the
beginning of the Whitsuntide Ember
week, and he wore a red cassock and had a distracting and rather
interesting day welcoming his ordination candidates. They had a
good effect upon him; we
spiritualize ourselves when we seek to
spiritualize others, and he went to bed in a happier frame of
mind than he had done since the day of the shock. He woke in the
night, but he woke much more himself than he had been since the
trouble began. He
repeated that verse of Ken's:
"When in the night I
sleepless lie,
My soul with
heavenly thoughts supply;
Let no ill dreams
disturb my rest,
No powers of darkness me molest."
Almost immediately after these there floated into his mind, as
if it were a message, the dear familiar words: