Dundee said to your Duke of Gordon." The entranced Scotsman little
knew that she had perfected this style of conversation by long
experience with the Q.C.'s of England. Talk about my being as deep
as the Currie Brig (whatever it may be); Salemina is deeper than the
Atlantic Ocean! I shall take pains to inform her Writer to the
Signet, after dinner, that she eats sugar on her porridge every
morning; that will show him her
nationality conclusively.
The earl took the greatest interest in my new ancestors, and
approved
thoroughly of my choice. He thinks I must have been named
for Lady Penelope Belhaven, who lived in Leven Lodge, one of the
country villas of the Earls of Leven, from whom he himself is
descended. "Does that make us relatives?" I asked. "Relatives,
most assuredly," he replied, "but not too near to destroy the charm
of friendship."
He thought it a great deal nicer to select one's own forebears than
to allow them all the
responsibility, and said it would save a world
of trouble if the method could be
universally adopted. He added
that he should be glad to part with a good many of his, but doubted
whether I would accept them, as they were `rather a
scratch lot.'
(I use his own language, which I thought
delightfully" target="_blank" title="ad.大喜,欣然">
delightfully easy for a
belted earl.) He was charmed with the story of Francesca and the
lamiter, and offered to drive me to Kildonan House, Helmsdale, on
the first fine day. I told him he was quite safe in making the
proposition, for we had already had the fine day, and we understood
that the
climate had exhausted itself and
retired for the season.
The gentleman on my left, a
distinguished Dean of the Thistle, gave
me a few moments'
discomfort by telling me that the old custom of
`rounds' of toasts still prevailed at Lady Baird's on formal
occasions, and that before the ladies
retired every one would be
called upon for
appropriate `sentiments.'
"What sort of sentiments?" I inquired, quite
overcome with terror.
"Oh, epigrammatic sentences
expressive of moral feelings or
virtues," replied my neighbour easily. "They are not quite as
formal and hackneyed now as they were in the olden time, when some
of the favourite toasts were `May the pleasure of the evening bear
the
reflections of the morning!' `May the friends of our youth be
the companions of our old age!' `May the honest heart never feel
distress!' `May the hand of
charity wipe the eye of sorrow!'"
"I can never do it in the world!" I ejaculated. "Oh, one ought
never, never to leave one's own country! A light-minded and cynical
English gentleman told me that I should frequently be called upon to
read hymns and
recite verses of Scripture at family dinners in
Edinburgh, and I hope I am always prepared to do that; but nobody
warned me that I should have to
evolve epigrammatic sentiments on
the spur of the moment."
My
confusion was so
evident that the good dean relented and
confessed that he was
imposing upon my
ignorance. He made me laugh
heartily at the story of a poor dominie at Arndilly. He was called
upon in his turn, at a large party, and having nothing to aid him in
an exercise to which he was new save the example of his
predecessors, lifted his glass after much writhing and groaning and
gave, "The
reflection of the moon in the cawm bosom of the lake!"
At this moment Lady Baird glanced at me, and we all rose to go into
the drawing-room; but on the way from my chair to the door, whither
the earl escorted me, he said gallantly, "I suppose the men in your
country do not take
champagne at dinner? I cannot fancy their
craving it when dining beside an American woman!"
That was
charming, though he did pay my country a
compliment at my
expense. One likes, of course, to have the type recognised as fine;
at the same time his remark would have been more
flattering if it
had been less sweeping.
When I remember that he offered me his ancestors, asked me to drive
two hundred and eighty miles, and likened me to
champagne, I feel
that, with my heart already occupied and my hand promised, I could
hardly have
accomplished more in the course of a single dinner-hour.
Chapter VII. Francesca meets th' unconquer'd Scot.
Francesca's experiences were not so
fortunate; indeed, I have never
seen her more out of sorts than she was during our long chat over
the fire, after our return to Breadalbane Terrace.
"How did you get on with your
delightful minister?" inquired
Salemina of the young lady, as she flung her unoffending wrap over
the back of a chair. "He was quite the handsomest man in the room;
who is he?"
"He is the Reverend Ronald Macdonald, and the most disagreeable,
condescending, ill-tempered prig I ever met!"
"Why, Francesca!" I exclaimed. "Lady Baird speaks of him as her
favourite
nephew, and says he is full of charm."
"He is just as full of charm as he was when I met him," returned the
girl nonchalantly; "that is, he parted with none of it this evening.
He was incorrigibly stiff and rude, and oh! so Scotch! I believe if
one punctured him with a hat-pin,
oatmeal would fly into the air!"
"Doubtless you acquainted him, early in the evening, with the
immeasurable advantages of our sleeping-car
system, the superiority
of our fast-running elevators, and the
height of our buildings?"
observed Salemina.
"I mentioned them," Francesca answered evasively.
"You naturally inveighed against the Scotch
climate?"
"Oh, I alluded to it; but only when he said that our hot summers
must be insufferable."
"I suppose you
repeated the remark you made at
luncheon, that the
ladies you had seen in Princes Street were excessively plain?"
"Yes, I did!" she replied hotly; "but that was because he said that
American girls generally looked bloodless and frail. He asked if it
were really true that they ate chalk and slate pencils. Wasn't that
unendurable? I answered that those were the chief solid article of
food, but that after their complexions were established, so to
speak, their parents often allowed them pickles and native claret to
vary the diet."
"What did he say to that?" I asked.
"Oh, he said, `Quite so, quite so'; that was his invariable response
to all my witticisms. Then when I told him casually that the shops
looked very small and dark and
stuffy here, and that there were not
as many tartans and plaids in the windows as we had expected, he
remarked that as to the latter point, the American season had not
opened yet! Presently he asserted that no royal city in Europe
could boast ten centuries of such
glorious and
stirring history as
Edinburgh. I said it did not appear to be
stirring much at present,
and that everything in Scotland seemed a little slow to an American;
that he could have no idea of push or
enterprise until he visited a
city like Chicago. He retorted that, happily, Edinburgh was
peculiarly free from the taint of the ledger and the counting-house;
that it was Weimar without a Goethe, Boston without its twang!"
"Incredible!" cried Salemina, deeply wounded in her local pride.
"He never could have said `twang' unless you had tried him beyond
measure!"
"I dare say I did; he is easily tried," returned Francesca. "I
asked him, sarcastically, if he had ever been in Boston. `No,' he
said, `it is not necessary to GO there! And while we are discussing
these matters,' he went on, `how is your American dyspepsia these
days,--have you
decided what is the cause of it?'
"'Yes, we have,' said I, as quick as a flash; `we have always taken
in more foreigners than we could assimilate!' I wanted to tell him
that one Scotsman of his type would upset the national digestion
anywhere, but I
restrained myself."
"I am glad you did
restrain yourself--once," exclaimed Salemina.
"What a tactful person the Reverend Ronald must be, if you have
reported him faithfully! Why didn't you give him up, and turn to