skeleton at the time. I sometimes wonder if his nose really did
bleed. Of course he swore it did, on the
witness stand. But I have
known prison guards take oath to worse perjuries than that.
Ed Morrell was eager to know if I had succeeded with the experiment;
but when he attempted to talk with me he was shut up by Smith, the
guard who happened to be on duty in
solitary.
"That's all right, Ed," I rapped to him. "You and Jake keep quiet,
and I'll tell you about it. Smith can't prevent you from listening,
and he can't prevent me from talking. They have done their worst,
and I am still here."
"Cut that out, Standing!" Smith bellowed at me from the
corridor on
which all the cells opened.
Smith was a
peculiarly saturnine individual, by far the most cruel
and vindictive of our guards. We used to canvass whether his wife
bullied him or whether he had
chronic indigestion.
I continued rapping with my knuckles, and he came to the wicket to
glare in at me.
"I told you to out that out," he snarled.
"Sorry," I said suavely. "But I have a sort of premonition that I
shall go right on rapping. And--er--excuse me for asking a personal
question--what are you going to do about it?"
"I'll--" he began explosively, proving, by his
inability to conclude
the remark, that he thought in henids.
"Yes?" I encouraged. "Just what, pray?"
"I'll have the Warden here," he said lamely.
"Do, please. A most
charming gentleman, to be sure. A shining
example of the refining influences that are creeping into our
prisons. Bring him to me at once. I wish to report you to him."
"Me?"
"Yes, just
precisely you," I continued. "You
persist, in a rude and
boorish manner, in interrupting my conversation with the other
guests in this hostelry."
And Warden Atherton came. The door was unlocked, and he blustered
into my cell. But oh, I was so safe! He had done his worst. I was
beyond his power.
"I'll shut off your grub," he threatened.
"As you please," I answered. "I'm used to it. I haven't eaten for
ten days, and, do you know,
trying to begin to eat again is a
confounded nuisance.
"Oh, ho, you're threatening me, are you? A
hunger strike, eh?"
"Pardon me," I said, my voice sulky with
politeness. "The
proposition was yours, not mine. Do try and be
logical on occasion.
I trust you will believe me when I tell you that your illogic is far
more
painful for me to
endure than all your tortures."
"Are you going to stop your knuckle-talking?" he demanded.
"No;
forgive me for vexing you--for I feel so strong a
compulsion to
talk with my knuckles that--"
"For two cents I'll put you back in the
jacket," he broke in.
"Do, please. I dote on the
jacket. I am the
jacket baby. I get
fat in the
jacket. Look at that arm." I pulled up my
sleeve and
showed a biceps so attenuated that when I flexed it it had the
appearance of a string. "A real blacksmith's biceps, eh, Warden?
Cast your eyes on my swelling chest. Sandow had better look out for
his laurels. And my abdomen--why, man, I am growing so stout that
my case will be a
scandal of prison overfeeding. Watch out, Warden,
or you'll have the taxpayers after you."
"Are you going to stop knuckle-talk?" he roared.
"No, thanking you for your kind solicitude. On
mature delibe
rationI have
decided that I shall keep on knuckle-talking."
He stared at me speechlessly for a moment, and then, out of sheer
impotency, turned to go.
"One question, please."
"What is it?" he demanded over his shoulder.
"What are you going to do about it?"
From the choleric
exhibition he gave there and then it has been an
unceasing wonder with me to this day that he has not long since died
of apoplexy.
Hour by hour, after the
warden's discomfited
departure, I rapped on
and on the tale of my adventures. Not until that night, when Pie-
Face Jones came on duty and proceeded to steal his
customary naps,
were Morrell and Oppenheimer able to do any talking.
"Pipe dreams," Oppenheimer rapped his verdict.
Yes, was my thought; our experiences ARE the stuff of our dreams.
"When I was a night
messenger I hit the hop once," Oppenheimer
continued. "And I want to tell you you haven't anything on me when
it came to
seeing things. I guess that is what all the novel-
writers do--hit the hop so as to throw their
imagination into the
high gear."
But Ed Morrell, who had travelled the same road as I, although with
different results, believed my tale. He said that when his body
died in the
jacket, and he himself went forth from prison, he was
never anybody but Ed Morrell. He never
experienced previous
existences. When his spirit wandered free, it wandered always in
the present. As he told us, just as he was able to leave his body
and gaze upon it lying in the
jacket on the cell floor, so could he
leave the prison, and, in the present, revisit San Francisco and see
what was occurring. In this manner he had visited his mother twice,
both times
finding her asleep. In this spirit-roving he said he had
no power over material things. He could not open or close a door,
move any object, make a noise, nor
manifest his presence. On the
other hand, material things had no power over him. Walls and doors
were not obstacles. The entity, or the real thing that was he, was
thought, spirit.
"The
grocery store on the corner, half a block from where mother
lived, changed hands," he told us. "I knew it by the different sign
over the place. I had to wait six months after that before I could
write my first letter, but when I did I asked mother about it. And
she said yes, it had changed."
"Did you read that
grocery sign?" Jake Oppenheimer asked.
"Sure thing I did," was Morrell's
response. "Or how could I have
known it?"
"All right," rapped Oppenheimer the unbelieving. "You can prove it
easy. Some time, when they shift some
decent guards on us that will
give us a peep at a newspaper, you get yourself thrown into the
jacket, climb out of your body, and sashay down to little old
'Frisco. Slide up to Third and Market just about two or three a.m.
when they are
running the morning papers off the press. Read the
latest news. Then make a swift sneak for San Quentin, get here
before the newspaper tug crosses the bay, and tell me what you read.
Then we'll wait and get a morning paper, when it comes in, from a
guard. Then, if what you told me is in that paper, I am with you to
a fare-you-well."
It was a good test. I could not but agree with Oppenheimer that
such a proof would be
absolute. Morrell said he would take it up
some time, but that he disliked to such an
extent the process of
leaving 'his body that he would not make the attempt until such time
that his
suffering in the
jacket became too
extreme to be borne.
"That is the way with all of them--won't come across with the
goods," was Oppenheimer's
criticism. "My mother believed in
spirits. When I was a kid she was always
seeing them and talking
with them and getting advice from them. But she never come across
with any goods from them. The spirits couldn't tell her where the
old man could nail a job or find a gold-mine or mark an eight-spot
in Chinese
lottery. Not on your life. The bunk they told her was
that the old man's uncle had had a goitre, or that the old man's
grandfather had died of galloping
consumption, or that we were going
to move house inside four months, which last was dead easy,
seeingas we moved on an average of six times a year."