loud-wailing the while: "O my lady, may thy head live and mayst thou
survive Abu al-Hasan al-Khali'a, for he is dead!" The Lady Zubaydah
mourned for him and said, "Alas, poor Abu al-Hasan the wag!" and she
shed tears for him
awhile. Then she bade her treasuress give Nuzhat
al-Fuad a hundred dinars and a piece of silk and said to her, "O
Nuzhat al-Fuad, go, lay him out and carry him forth."
So she took the hundred dinars and the piece of silk and returned to
her
dwelling,
rejoicing, and went in to her
spouse and
acquainted
him what had
befallen,
whereupon he arose and rejoiced and girdled his
middle and danced and took the hundred dinars and the piece of silk
and laid them up. Then he laid out Nuzhat al-Fuad and did with her
as she had done with him, after which he rent his
raiment and
plucked out his beard and disordered his
turban and ran out, nor
ceased
running till he came in to the Caliph, who was sitting in the
judgment hall, and he in this
plight,
beating his breast. The Caliph
asked him, "What aileth thee, O Abu al-Hasan?" and he wept and
answered, "Would Heaven thy cup
companion had never been, and would
his hour had never come!" Quoth the Caliph, "Tell me thy case," and
quoth Abu al-Hasan, "O my lord, may thy head outlive Nuzhat
al-Fuad!" The Caliph exclaimed, "There is no god but God," and smote
hand upon hand. Then he comforted Abu al-Hasan and said to him,
"Grieve not, for we will
bestow upon thee a bedfellow other than she."
And he ordered the treasurer to give him a hundred dinars and a piece
of silk. Accordingly the treasurer did what the Caliph bade him, and
Al-Rashid said to him, "Go, lay her out and carry her forth and make
her a handsome funeral."
So Abu al-Hasan took that which he had given him and returning to
his house,
rejoicing, went in to Nuzhat al-Fuad and said to her,
"Arise, for our wish" is won." Hereat she arose and he laid before her
the hundred ducats and the piece of silk,
whereat she rejoiced, and
they added the gold to the gold and the silk to the silk and sat
talking and laughing each to other.
Meanwhile, when Abu al-Hasan fared forth the presence of the
Caliph and went to lay out Nuzhat al-Fuad, the Commander of the
Faithful mourned for her, and dismissing the Divan, arose and betook
himself, leaning upon Masrur, the Sworder of his
vengeance, to the
Lady Zubaydah, that he might condole with her for her handmaid. He
found her sitting
weeping and awaiting his coming, so she might
condole with him for his boon
companion Abu al-Hasan the wag. So he
said to her, "May thy head outlive thy slave girl Nuzhat al-Fuad!" and
said she: "O my lord, Allah
preserve my slave girl! Mayst thou live
and long
survive thy boon
companion Abu al-Hasan al-Khali'a, for he is
dead." The Caliph smiled and said to his
eunuch: "O Masrur, verily
women are little of wit. Allah upon thee, say, was not Abu al-Hasan
with me but now?" Quoth the Lady Zubaydah, laughing from a heart
full of wrath: "Wilt thou not leave thy jesting? Sufficeth thee not
that Abu al-Hasan is dead, but thou must put to death my slave girl
also and bereave us of the twain, and style me little of wit?" The
Caliph answered, "Indeed, 'tis Nuzhat al-Fuad who is dead." And the
Lady Zubaydah said: "Indeed he hath not been with thee, nor hast
thou seen him, and none was with me but now save Nuzhat al-Fuad, and
she
sorrowful,
weeping, with her clothes torn to tatters. I exhorted
her to
patience and gave her a hundred dinars and a piece of silk, and
indeed I was awaiting thy coming, so I might
console thee for thy
cup
companion Abu al-Hasan al-Khali'a, and was about to send for
thee." The Caliph laughed and said, "None is dead save Nuzhat
al-Fuad," and she, "No, no, good my lord; none is dead but Abu
al-Hasan the wag."
With this the Caliph waxed wroth, and the hashimi vein started out
from between his eyes and throbbed, and he cried out to Masrur and
said to him, "Fare thee forth to the house of Abu al-Hasan the wag,
and see which of them is dead." So Masrur went out,
running, and the
Caliph said to the Lady Zubaydah, "Wilt thou lay me a wager?" And said
she, "Yes, I will wager, and I say that Abu al-Hasan is dead."
Rejoined the Caliph: "And I wager and say that none is dead save
Nuzhat al-Fuad, and the stake between me and thee shall be the
Garden of Pleasaunce against thy palace and the Pavilion of Pictures."
So they agreed upon this and sat awaiting Masrur's return with the
news.
As for the
eunuch, he ceased not
running till he came to the
by-street
wherein was the stead of Abu al-Hasan al-Khali'a. Now the
wag was
comfortably seated and leaning back against the lattice, and
chancing to look round, saw Masrur
running along the street and said
to Nuzhat al-Fuad, "Meseemeth the Caliph, when I went forth from
him, dismissed the Divan and went in to the Lady Zubaydah to condole
with her,
whereupon she arose and condoled with him,
saying, 'Allah
increase thy
recompense for the loss of Abu al-Hasan al-Khali'a!'
And he said to her, 'None is dead save Nuzhat al-Fuad, may thy head
outlive her!' Quoth she, ''Tis not she who is dead, but Abu al-Hasan
al-Khali'a, thy boon
companion.' And quoth he, 'None is dead save
Nuzhat al-Fuad.' And they waxed so
obstinate that the Caliph became
wroth and they laid a wager, and he hath sent Masrur the Sworder to
see who is dead. Now,
therefore, 'twere best that thou lie down, so he
may sight thee and go and
acquaint the Caliph and
confirm my
saying."
So Nuzhat al-Fuad stretched herself out and Abu al-Hasan covered her
with her mantilla and sat
weeping at her head. Presently, Masrur,
the
eunuch, suddenly came in to him and saluted him, and
seeing Nuzhat
al-Fuad stretched out, uncovered her face and said: "There is no god
but God! Our sister Nuzhat al-Fuad is dead indeed. How sudden was
the stroke of Destiny! Allah have ruth on thee and
acquit thee of
all charge!" Then he returned and
related what had passed before the
Caliph and the Lady Zubaydah, and he laughing as he spoke. "O accursed
one," cried the Caliph: "this is no time for laughter! Tell us which
is dead of them." Masrur replied: "By Allah, O my lord, Abu al-Hasan
is well, and none is dead but Nuzhat al-Fuad." Quoth the Caliph to
Zubaydah, "Thou hast lost thy
pavilion in thy play," and he jeered
at her. and said, "O Masrur, tell her what thou sawest."
Quoth the
eunuch: "Verily, O my lady, I ran without ceasing till I
came in to Abu al-Hasan in his house, and found Nuzhat al-Fuad lying
dead and Abu al-Hasan sitting tearful at her head. I saluted him and
condoled with him and sat down by his side and uncovered the face of
Nuzhat al-Fuad and saw her dead and her face
swollen. So I said to
him, 'Carry her out
forthwith, so we may pray over her.' He replied,
''Tis well,' and I left him to lay her out and came
hither, that I
might tell you the news." The Prince of True Believers laughed and
said, "Tell it again and again to thy lady Little-wits." When the Lady
Zubaydah heard Masrur's words and those of the Caliph she was wroth
and said, "None is little of wit save he who believeth a black slave."
And she abused Masrur,
whilst the Commander of the Faithful laughed;
and the
eunuch, vexed at this, said to the Caliph, "He spake sooth who
said, 'Women are little of wits and lack religion."'
Then said the Lady Zubaydah to the Caliph: "O Commander of the
Faithful, thou sportest and jestest with me, and this slave
hoodwinketh me, the better to please thee. But I will send and see
which of them be dead." And he answered,
saying, "Send one who shall
see which of them is dead." So the Lady Zubaydah cried out to an old
duenna, and said to her: "Hie thee to the house of Nuzhat al-Fuad in
haste and see who is dead, and
loiter not." And she used hard words to
her. So the old woman went out
running,
whilst the Prince of True
Believers and Masrur laughed, and she ceased not
running till she came
into the street. Abu al-Hasan saw her, and
knowing her, said to his
wife: "O Nuzhat al-Fuad, meseemeth the Lady Zubaydah hath sent to us
to see who is dead and hath not given credit to Masrur's report of thy
death. Accordingly she hath dispatched the old crone, her duenna, to
discover the truth. So it behooveth me to be dead in my turn for the
sake of thy credit with the Lady Zubaydah."
Hereat he lay down and stretched himself out, and she covered him
and bound his eyes and feet and sat in tears at his head. Presently
the old woman came in to her and saw her sitting at Abu al-Hasan's
head,
weeping and recounting his fine qualities; and when she saw
the old trot, she cried out and said to her: "See what hath
befallenme! Indeed Abu al-Hasan is dead and hath left me lone and lorn!"
Then she shrieked out and rent her
raiment and said to the crone, "O
my mother, how very good he was to me!" Quoth the other, "Indeed
thou art excused, for thou wast used to him and he to thee."
Then she considered what Masrur had reported to the Caliph and the
Lady Zubaydah and said to her, "Indeed, Masrur goeth about to cast
discord between the Caliph and the Lady Zubaydah." Asked Nuzhat
al-Fuad, "And what is the cause of
discord, O my mother?" and the
other replied: "O my daughter, Masrur came to the Caliph and the
Lady Zubaydah and gave them news of thee that thou wast dead and
that Abu al-Hasan was well." Nuzhat al-Fuad said to her: "O naunty
mine, I was with my lady just now and she gave me a hundred dinars and
a piece of silk, and now see my case and that which hath
befallenme! Indeed I am bewildered, and how shall I do, and I lone and lorn?
Would Heaven I had died and he had lived!" Then she wept and with
her wept the old woman, who, going up to Abu al-Hasan and uncovering
his face, saw his eyes bound and
swollen for the swathing. So she
covered him again and said, "Indeed, O Nuzhat al-Fuad, thou art
afflicted in Abu al-Hasan!"
Then she condoled with her, and going out from her, ran along the
street till she came into the Lady Zubaydah and
related to her the
story, and the Princess said to her, laughing: "Tell it over again
to the Caliph, who maketh me out little of wit, and
lacking of
religion, and who made this ill-omened liar of a slave
presume to
contradict me." Quoth Masrur, "This old woman lieth, for I saw Abu
al-Hasan well and Nuzhat al-Fuad it was who lay dead." Quoth the
duenna, "'Tis thou that liest, and wouldst fain cast
discord-between
the Caliph and the Lady Zubaydah." And Masrur cried, "None lieth but
thou, O old woman of ill omen, and thy lady believeth thee, and she
must be in her dotage." Whereupon the Lady Zubaydah cried out at him,
and in very sooth she was enraged with him and with his speech and
shed tears.
Then said the Caliph to her: "I lie and my
eunuch lieth, and thou
liest and thy waiting-woman lieth, so 'tis my rede we go, all four
of us together, that we may see which of us telleth the truth." Masrur
said: "Come, let us go, that I may do to this ill-omened old woman
evil deeds and deal her a sound drubbing for her lying." And the
duenna answered him: "O dotard, is thy wit like into my wit? Indeed
thy wit is as the hen's wit." Masrur was incensed at her words and
would have laid
violent hands on her, but the Lady Zubaydah pushed him
away from her and said to him, "Her truthspeaking will
presently be
distinguished from thy truth-speaking and her leasing from thy
leasing." Then they all four arose, laying wagers one with other,
and went forth afoot from the palace gate and hied on till they came
in at the gate of the street where Abu al-Hasan al-Khali'a dwelt.
He saw them, and said to his wife, Nuzhat al-Fuad: "Verily, all that
is
sticky is not a pancake they cook, nor every time shall the crock
escape the shock. It seemeth the old woman hath gone and told her lady
and
acquainted her with our case and she hath disputed with Masrur,
the
eunuch, and they have laid wagers each with other about our
death and are come to us, all four, the Caliph and the
eunuch and
the Lady Zubaydah and the old trot." When Nuzhat al-Fuad heard this,
she started up from her
outstretchedposture and asked, "How shall
we do?" whereto he answered, "We will both feign ourselves dead
together and stretch ourselves out and hold out breath." So she
hearkened unto him and they both lay down on the place where they
usually slept the siesta and bound their feet and shut their eyes
and covered themselves with the veil and held their breath.
Presently up came the Caliph, Zubaydah, Masrur, and the old woman,
and entering, found Abu al-Hasan the wag and wife both stretched out
as dead, which when the Lady saw, she wept and said: "They ceased
not to bring ill news of my slave girl till she died. Methinketh Abu
al-Hasan's death was
grievous to her and that she died after him."
Quoth the Caliph: "Thou shalt not prevent me with thy prattle and
prate. She certainly died before Abu al-Hasan, for he came to me
with his
raiment rent and his beard plucked out,
beating his breast
with two bits of unbaked brick, and I gave him a hundred dinars and
a piece of silk and said too him, 'Go, bear her forth, and I will give
thee a bedfellow other than she and handsomer, and she shall be
instead of her.' But it would appear that her death was no light