ALCIBIADES. Call'st thou that harm?
TIMON. Men daily find it. Get thee away, and take
Thy beagles with thee.
ALCIBIADES. We but
offend him. Strike.
Drum beats. Exeunt all but TIMON
TIMON. That nature, being sick of man's unkindness,
Should yet be hungry! Common mother, thou, [Digging]
Whose womb unmeasurable and
infinite breast
Teems and feeds all; whose self-same mettle,
Whereof thy proud child,
arrogant man, is puff'd,
Engenders the black toad and adder blue,
The gilded newt and eyeless venom'd worm,
With all th' abhorred births below crisp heaven
Whereon Hyperion's quick'ning fire doth shine-
Yield him, who all thy human sons doth hate,
From forth thy plenteous bosom, one poor root!
Ensear thy
fertile and conceptious womb,
Let it no more bring out ingrateful man!
Go great with tigers, dragons, wolves, and bears;
Teem with new monsters whom thy
upward face
Hath to the marbled
mansion all above
Never presented!- O, a root! Dear thanks!-
Dry up thy marrows, vines, and plough-torn leas,
Whereof ingrateful man, with liquorish draughts
And morsels unctuous, greases his pure mind,
That from it all
consideration slips-
Enter APEMANTUS
More man? Plague,
plague!
APEMANTUS. I was directed
hither. Men report
Thou dost
affect my manners and dost use them.
TIMON. 'Tis, then, because thou dost not keep a dog,
Whom I would
imitate. Consumption catch thee!
APEMANTUS. This is in thee a nature but
infected,
A poor unmanly
melancholy sprung
From change of fortune. Why this spade, this place?
This slave-like habit and these looks of care?
Thy
flatterers yet wear silk, drink wine, lie soft,
Hug their diseas'd perfumes, and have forgot
That ever Timon was. Shame not these woods
By putting on the
cunning of a carper.
Be thou a
flatterer now, and seek to thrive
By that which has
undone thee: hinge thy knee,
And let his very
breath whom thou'lt observe
Blow off thy cap; praise his most
vicious strain,
And call it excellent. Thou wast told thus;
Thou gav'st thine ears, like tapsters that bade welcome,
To knaves and all approachers. 'Tis most just
That thou turn
rascal; hadst thou
wealth again
Rascals should have't. Do not assume my likeness.
TIMON. Were I like thee, I'd throw away myself.
APEMANTUS. Thou hast cast away thyself, being like thyself;
A
madman so long, now a fool. What, think'st
That the bleak air, thy
boisterous chamberlain,
Will put thy shirt on warm? Will these moist trees,
That have outliv'd the eagle, page thy heels
And skip when thou point'st out? Will the cold brook,
Candied with ice, caudle thy morning taste
To cure thy o'ernight's surfeit? Call the creatures
Whose naked natures live in all the spite
Of wreakful heaven, whose bare unhoused trunks,
To the conflicting elements expos'd,
Answer mere nature- bid them
flatter thee.
O, thou shalt find-
TIMON. A fool of thee. Depart.
APEMANTUS. I love thee better now than e'er I did.
TIMON. I hate thee worse.
APEMANTUS. Why?
TIMON. Thou
flatter'st misery.
APEMANTUS. I
flatter not, but say thou art a caitiff.
TIMON. Why dost thou seek me out?
APEMANTUS. To vex thee.
TIMON. Always a villain's office or a fool's.
Dost please thyself in't?
APEMANTUS. Ay.
TIMON. What, a knave too?
APEMANTUS. If thou didst put this sour-cold habit on
To castigate thy pride, 'twere well; but thou
Dost it enforcedly. Thou'dst
courtier be again
Wert thou not
beggar. Willing misery
Outlives incertain pomp, is crown'd before.
The one is filling still, never complete;
The other, at high wish. Best state, contentless,
Hath a distracted and most
wretched being,
Worse than the worst, content.
Thou should'st desire to die, being miserable.
TIMON. Not by his
breath that is more miserable.
Thou art a slave whom Fortune's tender arm
With favour never clasp'd, but bred a dog.
Hadst thou, like us from our first swath, proceeded
The sweet degrees that this brief world affords
To such as may the
passive drugs of it
Freely command, thou wouldst have plung'd thyself
In general riot, melted down thy youth
In different beds of lust, and never learn'd
The icy precepts of respect, but followed
The sug'red game before thee. But myself,
Who had the world as my confectionary;
The mouths, the tongues, the eyes, and hearts of men
At duty, more than I could frame employment;
That
numberless upon me stuck, as leaves
Do on the oak, have with one winter's brush
Fell from their boughs, and left me open, bare
For every storm that blows- I to bear this,
That never knew but better, is some burden.
Thy nature did
commence in sufferance; time
Hath made thee hard in't. Why shouldst thou hate men?
They never
flatter'd thee. What hast thou given?
If thou wilt curse, thy father, that poor rag,
Must be thy subject; who, in spite, put stuff
To some she-
beggar and compounded thee
Poor rogue
hereditary. Hence, be gone.
If thou hadst not been born the worst of men,
Thou hadst been a knave and
flatterer.
APEMANTUS. Art thou proud yet?
TIMON. Ay, that I am not thee.
APEMANTUS. I, that I was
No prodigal.
TIMON. I, that I am one now.
Were all the
wealth I have shut up in thee,
I'd give thee leave to hang it. Get thee gone.
That the whole life of Athens were in this!
Thus would I eat it. [Eating a root]
APEMANTUS. Here! I will mend thy feast.
[Offering him food]
TIMON. First mend my company: take away thyself.
APEMANTUS. So I shall mend mine own by th' lack of thine.
TIMON. 'Tis not well mended so; it is but botch'd.
If not, I would it were.
APEMANTUS. What wouldst thou have to Athens?
TIMON. Thee t
hither in a
whirlwind. If thou wilt,
Tell them there I have gold; look, so I have.
APEMANTUS. Here is no use for gold.
TIMON. The best and truest;
For here it sleeps and does no hired harm.
APEMANTUS. Where liest a nights, Timon?
TIMON. Under that's above me.
Where feed'st thou a days, Apemantus?
APEMANTUS. Where my
stomach. finds meat; or rather, where I eat it.
TIMON. Would
poison were
obedient, and knew my mind!
APEMANTUS. Where wouldst thou send it?
TIMON. To sauce thy dishes.
APEMANTUS. The middle of
humanity thou never knewest, but the
extremity of both ends. When thou wast in thy gilt and thy
perfume, they mock'd thee for too much
curiosity; in thy rags
thou know'st none, but art despis'd for the
contrary. There's a
medlar for thee; eat it.
TIMON. On what I hate I feed not.
APEMANTUS. Dost hate a medlar?
TIMON. Ay, though it look like thee.
APEMANTUS. An th' hadst hated medlars sooner, thou shouldst have
loved thyself better now. What man didst thou ever know unthrift
that was
beloved after his means?
TIMON. Who, without those means thou talk'st of, didst thou ever
know belov'd?
APEMANTUS. Myself.
TIMON. I understand thee: thou hadst some means to keep a dog.
APEMANTUS. What things in the world canst thou nearest compare to
thy
flatterers?
TIMON. Women nearest; but men, men are the things themselves. What
wouldst thou do with the world, Apemantus, if it lay in thy
power?
APEMANTUS. Give it the beasts, to be rid of the men.
TIMON. Wouldst thou have thyself fall in the
confusion of men, and
remain a beast with the beasts?
APEMANTUS. Ay, Timon.
TIMON. A
beastlyambition, which the gods grant thee t'
attain to!
If thou wert the lion, the fox would
beguile thee; if thou wert
the lamb, the fox would eat thee; if thou wert the fox, the lion
would
suspect thee, when, peradventure, thou wert accus'd by the
ass. If thou wert the ass, thy dulness would
torment thee; and
still thou liv'dst but as a breakfast to the wolf. If thou wert
the wolf, thy greediness would
afflict thee, and oft thou
shouldst
hazard thy life for thy dinner. Wert thou the unicorn,
pride and wrath would
confound thee, and make thine own self the
conquest of thy fury. Wert thou bear, thou wouldst be kill'd by
the horse; wert thou a horse, thou wouldst be seiz'd by the
leopard; wert thou a
leopard, thou wert german to the lion, and
the spots of thy
kindred were jurors on thy life. All thy safety
were remotion, and thy defence
absence. What beast
couldst thou
be that were not subject to a beast? And what beast art thou
already, that seest not thy loss in transformation!
APEMANTUS. If thou
couldst please me with
speaking to me, thou
mightst have hit upon it here. The common
wealth of Athens is
become a forest of beasts.
TIMON. How has the ass broke the wall, that thou art out of the
city?
APEMANTUS. Yonder comes a poet and a
painter. The
plague of company
light upon thee! I will fear to catch it, and give way. When I
know not what else to do, I'll see thee again.
TIMON. When there is nothing living but thee, thou shalt be
welcome. I had rather be a
beggar's dog than Apemantus.
APEMANTUS. Thou art the cap of all the fools alive.
TIMON. Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon!
APEMANTUS. A
plague on thee! thou art too bad to curse.
TIMON. All villains that do stand by thee are pure.
APEMANTUS. There is no leprosy but what thou speak'st.
TIMON. If I name thee.
I'll beat thee- but I should
infect my hands.
APEMANTUS. I would my tongue could rot them off!
TIMON. Away, thou issue of a mangy dog!
Choler does kill me that thou art alive;