"Yes, there is a change."
And after that, try as he would to get his
brother-in-law to
return to the subject of his looks, the latter would say nothing
about it. Praskovya Fedorovna came home and her brother went out
to her. Ivan Ilych locked to door and began to examine himself in
the glass, first full face, then in
profile. He took up a portrait
of himself taken with his wife, and compared it with what he saw in
the glass. The change in him was
immense. Then he bared his arms
to the elbow, looked at them, drew the sleeves down again, sat down
on an ottoman, and grew blacker than night.
"No, no, this won't do!" he said to himself, and jumped up,
went to the table, took up some law papers and began to read them,
but could not continue. He unlocked the door and went into the
reception-room. The door leading to the
drawing-room was shut. He
approached it on
tiptoe and listened.
"No, you are exaggerating!" Praskovya Fedorovna was saying.
"Exaggerating! Don't you see it? Why, he's a dead man! Look
at his eyes -- there's no life in them. But what is it that is
wrong with him?"
"No one knows. Nikolaevich [that was another doctor] said
something, but I don't know what. And Seshchetitsky [this was the
celebrated specialist] said quite the contrary..."
Ivan Ilych walked away, went to his own room, lay down, and
began musing; "The
kidney, a floating
kidney." He recalled all
the doctors had told him of how it detached itself and swayed
about. And by an effort of
imagination he tried to catch that
kidney and
arrest it and support it. So little was needed for
this, it seemed to him. "No, I'll go to see Peter Ivanovich
again." [That was the friend whose friend was a doctor.] He rang,
ordered the
carriage, and got ready to go.
"Where are you going, Jean?" asked his wife with a specially
sad and
exceptionally kind look.
This
exceptionally kind look irritated him. He looked
morosely at her.
"I must go to see Peter Ivanovich."
He went to see Peter Ivanovich, and together they went to see
his friend, the doctor. He was in, and Ivan Ilych had a long talk
with him.
Reviewing the anatomical and physiological details of what in
the doctor's opinion was going on inside him, he understood it all.
There was something, a small thing, in the vermiform
appendix.
It might all come right. Only
stimulate the
energy of one organ
and check the activity of another, then
absorption would take place
and everything would come right. He got home rather late for
dinner, ate his dinner, and conversed
cheerfully, but could not for
a long time bring himself to go back to work in his room. At last,
however, he went to his study and did what was necessary, but the
consciousness that he had put something aside -- an important,
intimate matter which he would
revert to when his work was done --
never left him. When he had finished his work he remembered that
this
intimate matter was the thought of his vermiform
appendix.
But he did not give himself up to it, and went to the
drawing-room
for tea. There were callers there, including the examining
magistrate who was a
desirable match for his daughter, and they
were conversing, playing the piano, and singing. Ivan Ilych, as
Praskovya Fedorovna remarked, spent that evening more
cheerfullythan usual, but he never for a moment forgot that he had postponed
the important matter of the
appendix. At eleven o'clock he said
goodnight and went to his bedroom. Since his
illness he had slept
alone in a small room next to his study. He undressed and took up
a novel by Zola, but instead of
reading it he fell into thought,
and in his
imagination that desired
improvement in the vermiform
appendix occurred. There was the
absorption and evacuation and the
re-establishment of
normal activity. "Yes, that's it!" he said to
himself. "One need only
assist nature, that's all." He remembered
his medicine, rose, took it, and lay down on his back watching for
the beneficent action of the medicine and for it to
lessen the
pain. "I need only take it
regularly and avoid all injurious
influences. I am already feeling better, much better." He began
touching his side: it was not
painful to the touch. "There, I
really don't feel it. It's much better already." He put out the