Eat healthier. Exercise twice a week. Read more books. Lose weight. We make the same resolutions every year, but why is following through such a challenge?

If Jim Novetta could change something in his life, he'd stop smoking. He's tried several times but failed.

"After doing it so long, you look forward to your next cigarette," said the 42-year-old Everett man. The longest he's lasted without a cigarette? Three days. "My challenge is myself."

For most of us, the New Year is synonymous with change. We use today as a benchmark to usher in a list of lofty resolutions. Pay off debt. Spend less. Work out. Lose weight.

Yet most of us fail, petering out after only a few days or, at best, weeks. Even the most successful among us, those who've climbed to the pinnacle of their fields, crash and burn when it comes to personal change. Oprah Winfrey, who's built nothing less than an empire of self-help, recently admitted she'd gained back 40 pounds. President-elect Barack Obama struggles to snuff out his cigarette habit.

So why is change so challenging? Are we wired in a way that keeps us from making changes? And do we need the support of others to implement our goals, or can we go it alone?

Professionals who help people make changes in their lives suggest that the anatomy of change is determined not by one's surroundings, but one's mindset. Beginning with small goals or steps usually leads to a bigger payoff later, they say. And trying to make a change is easier with support from a cheery group of friends, family, or co-workers with shared goals. But they caution that the experience is different for everyone.

A recent, highly publicized study that found that Happiness can lift the mood of a person's extendednetwork of friends also reported that same support base can influence change in someone's personal life.

"People are more likely to make positive changes in their lives not only when their friends do, but when their friends of friends do, and when their friends of friends of friends do," Nicholas Christakis, a professor of medical sociology at Harvard University and co-author of the study, wrote in an e-mail to the Globe. "The Biggest Loser," the popular NBC reality show where people compete in a group to lose weight, is one such example. They embark on the experience with rah-rah encouragement from friends, family, neighbors, or co-workers.

"People are better able to make changes in their lives - lose weight, quit smoking, become happy - when they do this with a large number of other people," he added. "Social networks have this interesting property of magnifying whatever they are seeded with, and so taking advantage of your social network ties can result in a magnification of your own efforts."

Jhonny Augustin understands that well. His resolution for 2008 was to shed 30 pounds from his 237-pound frame.

But the change didn't come easily.

"I'm a huge procrastinator," said the 24-year-old criminal psychology student at the University of Massachusetts-Boston. "I kept putting it off until tomorrow. I didn't get to do it until the summer."

That's when he saw his older brother working out. Augustin got inspired. Today, Augustin weighs 190 pounds.

"I read that it only takes 21 days to get into the motion of things. It's easier for me now to work out," he said.

Of course, change can happen only if people don't set their expectations too high or try to tackle too many changes at once; one of the biggest mistakes we make is setting unrealistic goals, said Dalia Llera, a psychologist and associate professor of counseling and psychology at Lesley University.

"You can't accomplish in a few weeks what you haven't accomplished in a few years," said Llera, of Jamaica Plain. "People set themselves up and then get discouraged because they failed in their attempts to make the changes they were hoping for. We have to take small steps."

Former Marine Charla McMillian subscribes to the baby-steps approach. People should keep their changes small and simple, she says, especially if those changes are focused on shedding pounds and getting into shape.

McMillian runs FitBoot exercise classes in Boston where she trains small groups of students in structured boot-camp drills - and she tells her clients to practice what she preaches.

"When you start off with this gigantic plan in place, it's really a set-up for failure," she said. "It becomes so abstract. 'I am going to get in shape in 2009.' But what does that mean?"

McMillian finds that people invest in new work-out equipment and gym memberships believing that will do the trick, when all it takes is something as simple as "rolling out of bed and banging out a set of 10 push-ups and 10 sit-ups."

"Once you've established a habit," she continued, "and that you've gotten up at a certain time, you've shown that you can execute something simple and you can build from there."

Having a positive attitude is one of the keys to making a successful change, according to Judy Zerafa, author of several books based on how people can improve their lives. In her "Seven Keys to Success" program, she underscores the importance of believing in yourself - and having positive habits, creative imagination, and persistence - to make change happen.

"Success in overcoming any self-defeating behavior particularly those related to health, finances, relationships and weight loss is almost guaranteed if you learn to reprogram the subconscious images in that part of the mind," Zerafa said in an e-mail.

Boston life coach Mary Kay Duffy believes that change can be extremely difficult for some people because they are "settled in a personal framework," meaning they tend to be passive when dealing with issues.

She suggests that people start a journal on what things may be troubling them. She also suggests that people prioritize and draft a timeline that allows for realistic goals.

Jenny Johnson, 26, is trying to do that now after failing to follow through on last year's resolution: to quit eating candy

"I have an enormous sweet tooth," Johnson said. "This was my way of being healthy."

But Johnson didn't last a weekend, surrendering to a box of Raisinets. Soon enough, she was back to munching on Tootsie Rolls, Sour Patch Kids, and Charleston Chews. She says she now sees where she went wrong.

"Instead of doing something that is more possible, you go to the extreme and you set yourself up for failure," said the cohost of NECN's "TV Diner." For 2009, she plans to keep her resolution relatively simple: Go to the gym twice a week.

"That will give me an opportunity to succeed and I will feel good about it," she added.

"And maybe next year, I will try quitting candy again."

为什么改变如此艰难

吃健康食品。一周锻炼两次。多读书。减肥。我们每年都下这些同样的决心,但是为什么下面的事情要经历挑战呢?

如果吉姆诺娃能够改变生活中某些事情,他可能已经戒烟了。他尝试了几次,但是失败了。

"吸烟这么久,你总是渴望着吸下一支烟。"42岁的艾威雷特说。他戒烟的最久记录?三天。"我的挑战是我自己"

对于我们中的大多数来说,新年就意味着改变。我们把新年作为一系列虚空决心的新开始。还清债务。减少消费。出去工作。减低体重。

但是我们中大多数人失败了,仅仅几天后决心就消失,最好的也是几个星期而已。甚至是我们中最成功的人士,那些已经达到自己所在领域的高峰,但是到了改变个人的时候,也是一败涂地。欧普温芙莱,一直非常自立,最近承认她胖了40磅。美国当选总统巴拉克奥巴马正在与戒烟做斗争。

那么为什么改变这样具有挑战性?我们已经被束缚在已有的生活方式里而难以做出改变吗?还是我们需要其他人的帮助来实现目标,或者是我们自己就可以呢?

帮助人们做出改变的一些专业人士建议说,变化不是人们周围的环境决定的,而是人们的观念。他们说,起初定一些小的目标,回报常常会很大。如果可以从乐观的朋友那里,或者家庭里,或者有共同目标的同事那里得到帮助,改变会容易些。但是他们也警告说,每个人的生活经历不相同。

"人们如果和很多人一起去减肥,戒烟,变得快乐的话,他们会更好地改变。"他又说,"很有趣,网络具有这种宣扬功能,不管是什么,网络都会宣扬,所以好好利用网络联系能够使你的努力有更多回报。"

约翰奥古斯非常清楚这一点。他2008年的计划是把自己的237磅的体重减少30磅。

但是变化不是那么容易。

"我非常拖拉,"这个24岁的波士顿马萨诸塞州大学的犯罪心理学专业的学生说,"我一直拖延,总把这事推到明天。我曾想只有到夏天再去做了。"

就在同时,他看到他哥哥外出工作了。他非常受鼓舞。今天,奥古斯体重190磅。

"我从书上得知改变一些事情只需要21天。现在要我去外出工作我就已经很容易做到了。"他说。

黛莲里拉是莱斯利大学心理咨询专业的一个副教授,也是一个心理学家,她说:当然,只有在人们期望值不太高,或者努力去做太多改变时,改变才能发生。我们常有的最大的错误是设立一些不实际的目标。

"你不能在几个星期内完成你几年都没有完成的事。"来自牙买加平原的里拉说,"人们做好了计划,但是然后很失望。因为他们尝试去做出所向往的改变,结果却失败了。我们不得不一步一步慢慢来。"

曾经是海军一员的查拉麦克琳赞同用婴儿学走路的方法来做出改变。她说,人们应该使他们的改变简单易行,特别是那些改变的目的是减肥和保持体形的人。

麦卡林在波士顿举办了一个减肥塑形班,在那里她用有组织的训练海军新兵的方法培训各个小组的成员,而且她告诉他们要照她说的去练习。

"当你心里有一个巨大的计划时,你真的已经准备好失败了。"她说,"'我要在2009年保持体形。'这句话很抽象。这意味着什么呢。"

麦克林发现当事情简单得就像从床上爬起来做10个俯卧撑和10个仰卧起坐时,投资去买不景气的新机器的人,和参加体操班的人都相信自己会成功。

"一旦你在某段时间养成了一个习惯,"她还说,"就表明你可以做简单的事情,你就可以从那里起步走向成功。"

朱迪扎拉写了几本关于人们怎么样可以改善生活状况的书,她说,拥有积极的态度是成功做出改变的诀窍之一。在她的"走向成功的七个秘诀"中,她强调了改变过程中相信自己的重要性--另外还要有好的习惯,富有创造性的想象力,以及坚持不懈。

扎拉在一份电子邮件中写道,如果你学会了调整你头脑中的那些潜意识,肯定可以成功改变那些不好的行为,特别是那些和健康,财力,人际关系和减肥有关的行为。

波士顿生活导师玛丽肯达菲相信改变对于有些人来说特别艰难,因为他们生活在"自己固定的生活框架中",意味着他们倾向于被动地处理问题。

她建议人们可以在日志是写下来被困扰的事情。她也建议人们按顺序草拟一个时间表,来允许自己实现一些实际目标。

26岁的詹妮约翰逊正在努力这样做,因为她去年就决心不吃甜食,但是并没有成功。

约翰逊说:"我特别爱吃甜食,这样我可以保持健康。"

当时约翰逊持续一个周末的时间,就经不住一盒葡萄干的诱惑,又开始吃甜食了。很快,她就又开始大口吃可爱的甜卷,酸酸的羊肉片,查尔斯顿甜点。她说她现在明白是哪里出了问题。

NECN的"电视大餐"节目的一个主持人说:"你没有去做一些可能实现的事情,而是走了极端,你为你自己准备了失败。"2009年,约翰逊打算让她的计划相对简单:每周两次去健身房。

她还说:"这样会给我一个成功的机会,而且我也会感觉很好。"

"然后下一年,我会努力不吃甜食。"
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