Wrote By: ~*Emily*~
11/30/2004

Malpractice ? The Hurt In My Heart Forever!
April 12th 1997 was a worm, beautiful day. The rain finally stopped after it was raining a weeklong. For me, this such as a nice day was a nightmare. I lost an important person in my life. I left from school on 5:30 pm. I bought a newspaper on the way home. After my grandmother lived in the hospital, read newspaper to her after I came from school was like one of my home works of everyday. I paddled my bike very fast. I couldn't wait to go to hospital. I wanted to see my grandmother, read news for her and told her every funny thing I saw today.
When I just stepped in the building, I saw my father and my uncle stood outside the room in the hall. My father's face looked terrible. His fingers stretched his hairs. He looked like very painful. I noticed that something bad happened to my grandmother. I run to them and pushed out the door. I saw more than five doctors and nurses around my grandmother's bed. They were busy trying to save her life. No one saw me stood beside. The tears have already exploded from my eyes. I was afraid to hear "I am sorry." from the doctor. I was afraid to know my grandmother's life will be end on this day.
My grandmother was a gynecologist. She decided to be a teacher after she retired. She taught and trained new nurses. She had plenty of clinical experiences. After she became a professor, she worked even harder than she was a doctor. She wanted her students to get all her knowledge and skills. My father told me that my grandmother fell in a faint several times when she was in teaching. As a doctor, my grandmother felt something wrong in her body. She always felt painfully. Also, her blood pressure was high. She didn't feel comfortable with the heart. She delayed the schedule to have an entire body examination because her senior class students were going to graduate. As their professor, she couldn't leave them. A few months later, she went to have an entire body examination. The doctor showed us the results. She said my grandmother needed operation immediately because there were calculus existed in her kidney. That's the reason why she always felt painful. Also, she told my grandmother that she needed to take the operation to excise her ovaries, because her ovaries couldn't secret any hormones. She has to take one kind of medicine to provide the hormones to her body without ovaries. After the operations, my grandmother kept to take the medicine for a lot of years.
Until 1996, my grandmother took the entire body examination again. They took several x-ray pictures for her abdomen. The result surprised the doctor. They found there were a few tumors. My grandmother lived in the hospital immediately. A week later, her doctor showed us the result. My grandmother had malignant tumor in ovary. My grandmother told them that her ovaries were excised by last operation in a few years ago. Her doctor gave to her a double check and made sure there was one left in her body. She always had one ovary in her body but she kept taking that hormones medicine for a long time. My grandmother knew women shouldn't take that medicine when they have ovaries. That was the reason made her has the cancer cell. After we knew the truth, we were very angry. My mom said, "I am going to sue that person. She can't be a doctor anymore. She is killing people!"
The cancer cells were developing very fast. She became skinnier. Her healthy condition was worse than before. The worst thing was the cancer cells have already spread to the liver cells. After the whole night discussion, several doctors and experts decided to use chemotherapy and radiotherapy on her. Both of these two treatments were very strong and also would bring many negative effects, but we had no other choices. That was the only way tried to save my grandmother's life.
After the first period treatment, my grandmother started losing her hairs and throwing up. She couldn't eat any thing was hard. Doctors added more amount of chemical by each period of treatment. I still remembered, after the last treatment my grandmother finished. She hardly ate anything. She couldn't swallow food. She had no energy to move. She couldn't walk. The only way she gained nutrition was they gave infusion into her body. After the long period of medical injection, her blood vessels became harder than normal. Her skins were dry and no elasticity. The large amount of chemical treatments didn't really work effectively. It didn't release the pain and the cancer cells were still kept spreading. Doctors didn't have any good method to rescuer her life. Their treatments, medical equipments, and medicines were not working on her body. It was hard to control and cure two cancers for doctors.
April 12th 1997, about 8 o'clock in the evening, my grandmother passed away. The salvage maintained nearly two hours. They still couldn't save her life because the limited medicine and medical technology. My grandmother left from us. She didn't leave any words to me. I still had many things wanted to tell her. I knew she wouldn't want to go, but maybe the death was the best way to let her not to suffer the pain anymore. She could have a new and happy life in the heaven. In above the sky, there are no pain, and no death. Three days after my grandmother passed away, we had a memorial meeting for her. There were over 200 people came to the cemetery. A lot of her students, her friends, and her coworkers came to there even we didn't tell them. 7 years have passed already. During these years, whenever I felt sad, I would like to hold my grandmother's picture and said to her, "Grand mom, I miss you."
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