CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT.
¡¡¡¡THERE IS NO NEED OF GOING into an
extendedrecital of our suffering in the small boat during the many days we were driven and drifted, here and there, willy-nilly, across the ocean. The high wind blew from the
northwest for twenty-four hours, when it fell calm, and in the night sprang up from the
southwest. This was dead in our teeth, but I took in the sea-anchor and set sail, hauling a course on the wind that took us in a south-
southeasterly direction. It was an even choice between this and the west-
northwesterly course that the wind permitted; but the warm airs of the south fanned my desire for a warmer sea and swayed my decision.
¡¡¡¡In three hours- it was midnight, I well remember, and as dark as I had ever seen it on the sea- the wind, still blowing out of the
southwest, rose
furiously, and once again I was compelled to set the sea-anchor.
¡¡¡¡Day broke and found me wan-eyed and the ocean lashed white, the boat pitching, almost on end, to its drag. We were in
imminent danger of being swamped by the whitecaps. As it was, spray and spume came aboard in such quantities that I baled without cessation. The blankets were soaking. Everything was wet except Maud, and she, in oilskins, rubber boots, and souwester, was dry, all but her face and hands and a stray wisp of hair. She relieved me at the baling-hole from time to time, and
bravely she threw out the water and faced the storm. All things are relative. It was no more than a stiff blow; but to us, fighting for life in our frail craft, it was indeed a storm.
¡¡¡¡Cold and cheerless, the wind
beating on our faces, the white seas roaring by, we struggled through the day. Night came, but neither of us slept. Day came, and still the wind beat on our faces and the white seas roared past. By the second night Maud was falling asleep from
exhaustion. I covered her with oilskins and a tarpaulin. She was comparatively dry, but she was numb with the cold. I feared greatly that she might die in the night; but day broke, cold and cheerless, with the same clouded sky and
beating wind and roaring seas.
¡¡¡¡I had had no sleep for forty-eight hours. I was wet and chilled to the
marrow, till I felt more dead than alive. My body was stiff from
exertion as well as from cold, and my aching muscles gave me the severest torture whenever I used them- and I used them
continually. And all the time we were being driven off into the
northeast, directly away from Japan and toward bleak Bering Sea.
¡¡¡¡And still we lived, and the boat lived, and the wind blew unabated. In fact, toward
nightfall of the third day it increased a trifle and something more. The boat's bow plunged under a crest, and we came through quarter full of water. I baled like a
madman. The
liability of shipping another such sea was
enormously increased by the water that weighed the boat down and robbed it of its buoyancy. And another such sea meant the end. When I had the boat empty again I was forced to take away the tarpaulin that covered Maud, in order that I might lash it down across the bow. It was well I did, for it covered the boat fully a third of the way aft, and three times in the next several hours it flung off the bulk of the down-rushing water when the bow shoved under the seas.
¡¡¡¡Maud's condition was pitiable. She sat crouched in the bottom of the boat, her lips blue, her face gray and plainly showing the pain she suffered. But ever her eyes looked
bravely at me, and ever her lips uttered brave words.
¡¡¡¡The worst of the storm must have blown that night, though little I noticed it. I had succumbed and slept where I sat in the stern-sheets. The morning of the fourth day found the wind diminished to a gentle whisper, the sea dying down, and the sun shining upon us. Oh, the
blessed sun! How we bathed our poor bodies in its delicious warmth, reviving like insects and crawling things after a storm! We smiled again, said
amusing things, and waxed optimistic over our situation. Yet it was, if anything, worse than ever. We were farther away from Japan than the night we left the Ghost. Nor could I more than
roughly guess our
latitude and
longitude. At a
calculation of a two-mile drift per hour, during the seventy and odd hours of the storm we had been driven at least one hundred and fifty miles to the
northeast. But was such calculated drift correct? For all I knew, it might have been four miles per hour instead of two, in which case we were another hundred and fifty miles to the bad.
¡¡¡¡Where we were I did not know, though there was quite a
likelihood that we were in the
vicinity of the Ghost. There were seals about us, and I was prepared to sight a sealing-
schooner at any time. We did sight one, in the afternoon, when the
northwest breeze had
sprung up
freshly once more; but the strange
schooner lost itself on the skyline, and we alone occupied the circle of the sea.
¡¡¡¡Came days of fog, when even Maud's spirit drooped and there were no merry words upon her lips; days of calm, when we floated on the lonely immensity of sea, oppressed by its
greatness and yet marveling at the miracle of tiny life, for we still lived and struggled to live; days of sleet and wind and snow-squalls, when nothing could keep us warm; or days of drizzling rain, when we filled our water-breakers from the drip of the wet sail.
¡¡¡¡And ever I loved Maud with an increasing love. She was so many-sided, so many-mooded- 'Protean-mooded' I called her. But I called her this, and other and dearer things, in my thoughts only. Though the
declaration of my love urged and trembled on my tongue a thousand times, I knew that it was no time for such a
declaration. If for no other reason, it was no time, when one was protecting and
trying to save a woman, to ask that woman for her love. Delicate as was the situation, not alone in this but in other ways, I flattered myself that I was able to deal
delicately with it; and also I flattered myself that by look or sign I gave no
advertisement of the love I felt for her. We were like good comrades, and we grew better comrades as the days went by.
¡¡¡¡One thing about her that surprised me was her lack of timidity and fear. The terrible sea, the frail-boat, the storms, the suffering, the strangeness and
isolation of the situation,- all that should have frightened a
robust woman,- seemed to make no impression upon her who had known life only in its most sheltered and consummately artificial aspects, and who was herself all fire and dew and mist, sublimated spirit- all that was soft and tender and clinging in woman. And yet I am wrong. She was timid and afraid, but she possessed courage. The flesh and the qualms of the flesh she was heir to, but the flesh bore heavily only on the flesh. And she was spirit, first and always spirit, etherealized
essence of life, as calm as her calm eyes, and sure of permanence in the changing order of the
universe.
¡¡¡¡Came days of storm, days and nights of storm, when the ocean menaced us with its roaring whiteness and the wind smote our struggling boat with a Titan's buffets. And ever we were flung off farther and farther to the
northeast. It was in such a storm, and the worst that we had
experienced, that I cast a weary glance to leeward, not in quest of anything, but more from the
weariness of facing the elemental
strife and in mute
appeal, almost, to the wrathful powers to cease and let us be. What I saw I could not at first believe; days and nights of sleeplessness and anxiety had doubtless turned my head. I looked back at Maud, to identify myself, as it were, in time and space. The sight of her dear wet cheeks, her flying hair, and her brave brown eyes convinced me that my vision was still healthy. Again I turned my face to leeward, and again I saw the jutting promontory, black and high and naked, the raging surf that broke about its base and beat its front high up with spouting fountains, the black and forbidding coastline running toward the
southeast and fringed with a tremendous scarf of white.
¡¡¡¡'Maud,' I said, 'Maud.'
¡¡¡¡She turned her head and beheld the sight.
¡¡¡¡'It cannot be Alaska!' she cried.
¡¡¡¡'No,' I answered; and asked, 'Can you swim?'
¡¡¡¡She shook her head.
¡¡¡¡'Neither can I,' I said. 'So we must get ashore without swimming, in some opening between the rocks through which we can drive the boat and
clamber out. But we must be quick, very quick- and sure.'
¡¡¡¡I spoke with a confidence she knew I did not feel, for she looked at me with that unfaltering gaze of hers, and said:
¡¡¡¡'I have not thanked you yet for all you have done for me, but-' She hesitated, as if in doubt how best to word her gratitude.
¡¡¡¡'Well?' I said brutally, for I was not quite pleased with her thanking me.
¡¡¡¡'You might help me,' she smiled.
¡¡¡¡'To acknowledge your obligations before you die? Not at all. We are not going to die. We shall land on that island, and we shall be snug and sheltered before the day is done.'
¡¡¡¡I spoke stoutly, but I did not believe a word. Nor was I prompted to lie through fear. I felt no fear, though I was sure of death in that boiling surge among the rocks which was rapidly growing nearer. It was impossible to hoist sail and claw off that shore. The wind would instantly capsize the boat; the seas would swamp it the moment it fell into the
trough; and, besides, the sail, lashed to the spare oars, dragged in the sea ahead of us.
¡¡¡¡As I say, I was not afraid to meet my own death there, a few hundred yards to leeward; but I was appalled at the thought that Maud must die. My cursed imagination saw her beaten and mangled against the rocks, and it was too terrible. I
strove to compel myself to think we would make the
landing safely, and so I spoke not what I believed, but what I preferred to believe.
¡¡¡¡I recoiled before
contemplation of that
frightful death, and for a moment I entertained the wild idea of seizing Maud in my arms and leaping
overboard. Then I
resolved to wait, and at the last moment, when we entered on the final stretch, to take her in my arms and proclaim my love, and, with her in my embrace, to make the desperate struggle and die.
¡¡¡¡Instinctively we drew closer together in the bottom of the boat. I felt her mittened hand come out to mine; and thus, without speech, we waited the end. We were not far off the line the wind made with the western edge of the promontory, and I watched in the hope that some set of the current or send of the sea would drift us past before we reached the surf.
¡¡¡¡'We shall go clear,' I said, with a confidence that I knew deceived neither of us. Five minutes later I cried: 'By God! We shall go clear!'
¡¡¡¡The oath left my lips in my excitement- the first, I do believe, in my life, unless 'trouble it,' an expletive of my youth, be accounted an oath.
¡¡¡¡'I beg your pardon,' I said.
¡¡¡¡'You have convinced me for the first time of your sincerity,' she said, with a faint smile. 'I do know now that we shall go clear.'
¡¡¡¡I had seen a distant
headland past the extreme edge of the promontory, and as we looked we could see grow the intervening coastline of what was evidently a deep cove. At the same time there broke upon our ears a continuous and
mighty bellowing. It partook of the
magnitude and volume of distant thunder, and it came to us directly from leeward, rising above the crash of the surf and traveling directly in the teeth of the storm. As we passed the point, the whole cove burst upon our view, a half-moon of white sandy beach upon which broke a huge surf and which was covered with myriads of seals. It was from them that the great bellowing went up.
¡¡¡¡'A rookery!' I cried. 'Now are we indeed saved. There must be men and cruisers to protect them from the seal-hunters. Possibly there is a station ashore.'
¡¡¡¡But as I
studied the surf that beat upon the beach, I said: 'Still bad, but not so bad. And now, if the gods be truly kind, we shall drift by that next
headland and come upon a
perfectly sheltered beach where we may land without wetting our feet.'
¡¡¡¡And the gods were kind. The first and second
headlands were directly in line with the
southwest wind; but once around the second,- and we went perilously close,- we picked up the third
headland, still in line with the wind and with the other two. But the cove that intervened! It penetrated deep into the land, and the tide,
setting in, drifted us under the shelter of the point. Here the sea was calm, save for a heavy but smooth ground-swell, and I took in the sea-anchor and began to row. From the point the shore curved away more and more to the south and west, until, at last, it disclosed a cove within the cove, a little landlocked harbor, the water as level as a pond, broken only by tiny ripples, where
vagrant breaths and wisps of the storm hurtled down from over the frowning wall of rock that backed the beach a hundred feet inshore.
¡¡¡¡Here were no seals whatever. The boat's stem touched the hard
shingle. I sprang out, extending my hand to Maud. The next moment she was beside me. As my fingers released hers, she clutched for my arm hastily. At the same moment I swayed, as if about to fall to the sand. This was the
startling effect of the cessation of
motion. We had been so long upon the moving, rocking sea that the stable land was a shock to us. We expected the beach to lift up this way and that, and the rocky walls to swing back and forth like the sides of a ship; and when we braced ourselves
automatically for these various expected movements, their non-occurrence quite
overcame our
equilibrium.
¡¡¡¡'I really must sit down,' Maud said, with a nervous laugh and a dizzy gesture, and
forthwith she sat down on the sand.
¡¡¡¡I attended to making the boat secure and joined her. Thus we landed on Endeavor Island, as we called it, land-sick from long custom of the sea.
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