TIPS

American travelers in Europe experience a great deal of trouble from the omnipresent need of tipping those from whom they expect any service, however slight. They are very apt to carry it much too far, or else attempt to resist it altogether. There is a story told of a wealthy and ostentatious American in a Parisian restaurant. As the waiter placed the order before him he said in a loud voice:

"Waiter, what is largest tip you ever received?"

"One thousand francs, monsieur."

"Eh bien!（法语）But I will give you two thousand," answered the upholder of American honor; and then in a moment he added: "May I ask who gave you the thousand francs?"

"It was yourself, monsieur," said the obsequious waiter.

Of quite an opposite mode of thought was another American visiting London for the first time. Goaded to desperation by the incessant necessity for tips, he finally entered the washroom of his hotel, only to be faced with a large sign which read: "Please tip the basin after using." "I'm hanged if I will!" said the Yankee, turning on his heel, "I'll go dirty first!"

在欧洲旅游的美国人总会在小费问题上遇到麻烦，无论需要的服务是大是小，小费总是无处不在。于是美国人要么是给的过了头，要么就是想一毛不拔。有一个故事，说一个富有且好卖弄的美国人在巴黎一间餐馆吃饭，堂倌给他端来了菜，他便用高声问道：

"服务员，你收过的最大一笔小费是多少？"

"一千法郎，先生。"

"那好！我给你两千！"好像为美国争得了荣誉。过了一会儿，他又问："我能否知道是谁给了你一千法郎？"

"就是你自己，先生。"堂倌奉承道。

另一个美国人的想法则恰恰相反。那是他第一次去伦敦，在那里他得不停地给小费，几乎都给逼上了绝境。最后在入住的旅馆的洗手间里他看到一行大字："用完后请清空水池。"（tip一是指"给小费"，还有一个意思多用于英国，指清空，倒干净）那美国佬叫道："我还不如吊死算了！"说完转身就走。"我先搞得脏一点去！"