There are two ways to spreading light :to be the candle or the mirror that reflect it !

传播光明的方法有两种：要么做一根蜡烛，要么做一面镜子去反射它的光芒！

you support someone when you willingly step forward to help him through a challengning time ,yet the great irony is that when you support others ,you are also ,in fact ,supporting yourself .when you withhold support from others ,it is usually an indicator that you are also withholding support from yourself .

当他人身处困境的时候，你主动帮助他渡过难关，你就是在支持他，或者你不会想到，你在支持他人的时候 ，你也在帮助你自己 ， 拒绝对他人施以援手，其实也是拒绝帮助自己。

we are most often to called upon to support others in friendship .one of my acquaintances,Donna ,told me a story recently that clearly illustrates the magic of support and its potential as an emotional mirror.

朋友之间是需要相互支持的，前几天，我的一位熟人唐纳给我讲述了一个故事，故事清晰的阐明了支持的魔力以及作为情感之境的潜在效应。

several years ago，Donna had been feeling very depressed,she had just broken up with her boyfriend of two years and she was having a very difficult time to accept the loss. she had been laid up with a knee injury for severy days,and the time alone at home certainly was not helping, her misery was only compounded by her frustration at herself for not being able to pull it together and stop crying all the time.

几年前，唐娜一直委靡不振，那时和她相恋两年的男朋友刚刚分手，这让她难以承受，接着她又因膝盖受伤卧床数日，当然孤独在家的日子对她的身心毫无益处，她无法控制这种局面，因而，痛苦不尴，整天懊恼，伤心，泪流满面．

Early one morning ,Donna received a phone call with some terrible news: her best friend's brother was killed in a car accident,Donna had known her friend and her brother for nearly her entire life ,and the news was devastating. however ,Donna quickly pulled herself together,got in the car ,and drove to her friend's house to be there with her

一天清晨，唐娜接到她最好的朋友的电话，她的弟弟在一场车祸中死去了，这一噩耗让唐娜悲恸万分，要知道，唐娜与他们有着多年的交情，可以算得上是一生的朋友，唐娜很快振作起来，立刻开车前往朋友家陪他。

Over the course of next few days, admist the haze of the funeral and hundreds of visitors, Donna was 100%present for her friend,she held her close while she cried endless tears, sat by her side as the waves of grigfe washed over her friend. and slept on the floor next to her friend's bed to make sure she did not wake up alone in the middle of the night. during that time she hardly feel any pain at all in her knee and none of the depression she had been experiencing

出事后的几天里，在张罗朋友弟弟的葬礼和接待来访者期间，唐娜总是陪在朋友身边，寸步不离，朋友痛不欲生的时候，唐娜仅仅的搂着她，朋友悲恸万分的时候，唐娜给她以慰藉，为了不让朋友在半夜惊醒后肚子黯然伤神，唐娜就睡在她旁边的地板上，那段时间里，唐娜全然忘记了身边的疼痛，心中的伤痛沉寂下来。

several weeks later,when life began to return ro normal, Donna realized that the level of support she had given her friend far exceeded any support she had offered herself during her dark time.she was able to use the support she had given her friend as a mirror for the support she has been withhold from herself,she realized that her own tears required as much attention and nurturing from her as anyone else's and that if she could give it to another ,she must be able to also give it to herself ....

之后几周，一切都回归常态，这时，唐娜才意识到，在这段阴暗的日子里，她给予朋友的支持远与多与给予自己的，她几乎没有主动帮助自己摆脱困境，她觉得自己也同样需要他人的关爱和支持，并且，她能给予别人关爱和支持，就一定能给予自己。

so ,when you find yourself unable to support someone else ,look within and see if perhaps there is something within yourself that you are not supporting ,conversely ,when you give complete support to others ,it will mirror those places within you that require the same level of attention

所以，当你发现自己无法给予他人关怀的时候，自习审视自己吧，看自己是否某些地方拒绝给予支持，反过来，如果你能全心全意地关怀他人，你就会发现这些地方，你也同样需要关爱。
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