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the matter. I am not interested in it."
Sarah at this moment opened the door and showed in Cummings, for

which I was thankful, for I felt it would put a stop to this
foolish table-turning. But I was entirely mistaken; for, on the

subject being opened again, Cummings said he was most interested in
Spiritualism, although he was bound to confess he did not believe

much in it; still, he was willing to be convinced.
I firmly declined to take any part in it, with the result that my

presence was ignored. I left the three sitting in the parlour at a
small round table which they had taken out of the drawing-room. I

walked into the hall with the ultimateintention of taking a little
stroll. As I opened the door, who should come in but Gowing!

On hearing what was going on, he proposed that we should join the
circle and he would go into a trance. He added that he KNEW a few

things about old Cummings, and would INVENT a few about Mrs. James.
Knowing how dangerous Gowing is, I declined to let him take part in

any such foolish performance. Sarah asked me if she could go out
for half an hour, and I gave her permission, thinking it would be

more comfortable to sit with Gowing in the kitchen than in the cold
drawing-room. We talked a good deal about Lupin and Mr. and Mrs.

Murray Posh, with whom he is as usual spending the evening. Gowing
said: "I say, it wouldn't be a bad thing for Lupin if old Posh

kicked the bucket."
My heart gave a leap of horror, and I rebuked Gowing very sternly

for joking on such a subject. I lay awake half the night thinking
of it - the other hall was spent in nightmares on the same subject.

May 31. - I wrote a stern letter to the laundress. I was rather
pleased with the letter, for I thought it very satirical. I said:

"You have returned the handkerchiefs without the colour. Perhaps
you will return either the colour or the value of the

handkerchiefs." I shall be rather curious to know what she will
have to say.

More table-turning in the evening. Carrie said last night was in a
measure successful, and they ought to sit again. Cummings came in,

and seemed interested. I had the gas lighted in the drawing-room,
got the steps, and repaired the cornice, which has been a bit of an

eyesore to me. In a fit of unthinkingness - if I may use such an
expression, - I gave the floor over the parlour, where the seance

was taking place, two loud raps with the hammer. I felt sorry
afterwards, for it was the sort of ridiculous, foolhardy thing that

Gowing or Lupin would have done.
However, they never even referred to it, but Carrie declared that a

message came through the table to her of a wonderful description,
concerning someone whom she and I knew years ago, and who was quite

unknown to the others.
When we went to bed, Carrie asked me as a favour to sit to-morrow

night, to oblige her. She said it seemed rather unkind and
unsociable on my part. I promised I would sit once.

June 1. - I sat reluctantly at the table in the evening, and I am
bound to admit some curious things happened. I contend they were

coincidences, but they were curious. For instance, the table kept
tilting towards me, which Carrie construed as a desire that I

should ask the spirit a question. I obeyed the rules, and I asked
the spirit (who said her name was Lina) if she could tell me the

name of an old aunt of whom I was thinking, and whom we used to
call Aunt Maggie. The table spelled out C A T. We could make

nothing out of it, till I suddenly remembered that her second name
was Catherine, which it was evidentlytrying to spell. I don't

think even Carrie knew this. But if she did, she would never
cheat. I must admit it was curious. Several other things

happened, and I consented to sit at another seance on Monday.
June 3. - The laundress called, and said she was very sorry about

the handkerchiefs, and returned ninepence. I said, as the colour
was completely washed out and the handkerchiefs quite spoiled,

ninepence was not enough. Carrie replied that the two
handkerchiefs originally only cost sixpence, for she remembered

bring them at a sale at the Holloway BON MARCHE. In that case, I
insisted that threepence buying should be returned to the

laundress. Lupin has gone to stay with the Poshs for a few days.
I must say I feel very uncomfortable about it. Carrie said I was

ridiculous to worry about it. Mr. Posh was very fond of Lupin,
who, after all, was only a mere boy.

In the evening we had another seance, which, in some respects, was
very remarkable, although the first part of it was a little

doubtful. Gowing called, as well as Cummings, and begged to be
allowed to join the circle. I wanted to object, but Mrs. James,

who appears a good Medium (that is, if there is anything in it at
all), thought there might be a little more spirit power if Gowing

joined; so the five of us sat down.
The moment I turned out the gas, and almost before I could get my

hands on the table, it rocked violently and tilted, and began
moving quickly across the room. Gowing shouted out: "Way oh!

steady, lad, steady!" I told Gowing if he could not behave himself
I should light the gas, and put an end to the seance.

To tell the truth, I thought Gowing was playing tricks, and I
hinted as much; but Mrs. James said she had often seen the table go

right off the ground. The spirit Lina came again, and said, "WARN"
three or four times, and declined to explain. Mrs. James said

"Lina" was stubborn sometimes. She often behaved like that, and
the best thing to do was to send her away.

She then hit the table sharply, and said: "Go away, Lina; you are
disagreeable. Go away!" I should think we sat nearly three-

quarters of an hour with nothing happening. My hands felt quite
cold, and I suggested we should stop the seance. Carrie and Mrs.

James, as well as Cummings, would not agree to it. In about ten
minutes' time there was some tilting towards me. I gave the

alphabet, and it spelled out S P O O F. As I have heard both
Gowing and Lupin use the word, and as I could hear Gowing silently

laughing, I directly accused him of pushing the table. He denied
it; but, I regret to say, I did not believe him.

Gowing said: "Perhaps it means 'Spook,' a ghost."
I said: "YOU know it doesn't mean anything of the sort."

Gowing said: "Oh! very well - I'm sorry I 'spook,'" and he rose
from the table.

No one took any notice of the stupid joke, and Mrs. James suggested
he should sit out for a while. Gowing consented and sat in the

arm-chair.
The table began to move again, and we might have had a wonderful

seance but for Gowing's stupid interruptions. In answer to the
alphabet from Carrie the table spelt "NIPUL," then the "WARN" three

times. We could not think what it meant till Cummings pointed out
that "NIPUL" was Lupin spelled backwards. This was quite exciting.

Carrie was particularly excited, and said she hoped nothing
horrible was going to happen.

Mrs. James asked if "Lina" was the spirit. The table replied
firmly, "No," and the spirit would not give his or her name. We

then had the message, "NIPUL will be very rich."
Carrie said she felt quite relieved, but the word "WARN" was again

spelt out. The table then began to oscillate violently, and in
reply to Mrs. James, who spoke very softly to the table, the spirit

began to spell its name. It first spelled "DRINK."
Gowing here said: "Ah! that's more in my line."

I asked him to be quiet as the name might not be completed.
The table then spelt "WATER."

Gowing here interrupted again, and said: "Ah! that's NOT in my
line. OUTSIDE if you like, but not inside."

Carrie appealed to him to be quiet.
The table then spelt "CAPTAIN," and Mrs. James startled us by

crying out, "Captain Drinkwater, a very old friend of my father's,
who has been dead some years."

This was more interesting, and I could not help thinking that after
all there must be something in Spiritualism.

Mrs. James asked the spirit to interpret the meaning of the word
"Warn" as applied to "NIPUL." The alphabet was given again, and we

got the word "BOSH."
Gowing here muttered: "So it is."

Mrs. James said she did not think the spirit meant that, as Captain
Drinkwater was a perfect gentleman, and would never have used the

word in answer to a lady's question. Accordingly the alphabet was
given again.

This time the table spelled distinctly "POSH." We all thought of
Mrs. Murray Posh and Lupin. Carrie was getting a little

distressed, and as it was getting late we broke up the circle.
We arranged to have one more to-morrow, as it will be Mrs. James'

last night in town. We also determined NOT to have Gowing present.
Cummings, before leaving, said it was certainly interesting, but he

wished the spirits would say something about him.
June 4. - Quite looking forward to the seance this evening. Was

thinking of it all the day at the office.
Just as we sat down at the table we were annoyed by Gowing entering

without knocking.
He said: "I am not going to stop, but I have brought with me a

sealed envelope, which I know I can trust with Mrs. Pooter. In
that sealed envelope is a strip of paper on which I have asked a

simple question. If the spirits can answer that question, I will
believe in Spiritualism."

I ventured the expression that it might be impossible.
Mrs. James said: "Oh no! it is of common occurrence for the

spirits to answer questions under such conditions - and even for
them to write on locked slates. It is quite worth trying. If

'Lina' is in a good temper, she is certain to do it."
Gowing said: "All right; then I shall be a firm believer. I shall

perhaps drop in about half-past nine or ten, and hear the result."
He then left and we sat a long time. Cummings wanted to know

something about some undertaking in which he was concerned, but he
could get no answer of any descriptionwhatever - at which he said

he was very disappointed and was afraid there was not much in
table-turning after all. I thought this rather selfish of him.

The seance was very similar to the one last night, almost the same
in fact. So we turned to the letter. "Lina" took a long time

answering the question, but eventually spelt out "ROSES, LILIES,
AND COWS." There was great rocking of the table at this time, and

Mrs. James said: "If that is Captain Drinkwater, let us ask him
the answer as well?"

It was the spirit of the Captain, and, most singular, he gave the
same identical answer: "ROSES, LILIES, AND COWS."

I cannot describe the agitation with which Carrie broke the seal,
or the disappointment we felt on reading the question, to which the

answer was so inappropriate. The question was, "WHAT'S OLD
POOTER'S AGE?"

This quite decided me.
As I had put my foot down on Spiritualism years ago, so I would

again.
I am pretty easy-going as a rule, but I can be extremely firm when

driven to it.
I said slowly, as I turned up the gas: "This is the last of this

nonsense that shall ever take place under my roof. I regret I
permitted myself to be a party to such tomfoolery. If there is

anything in it - which I doubt - it is nothing of any good, and I
WON'T HAVE IT AGAIN. That is enough."

Mrs. James said: "I think, Mr. Pooter, you are rather over-
stepping - "

I said: "Hush, madam. I am master of this house - please
understand that."

Mrs. James made an observation which I sincerely hope I was
mistaken in. I was in such a rage I could not quite catch what she

said. But if I thought she said what it sounded like, she should
never enter the house again.

CHAPTER XXIII.
Lupin leaves us. We dine at his new apartments, and hear some

extraordinary information respecting the wealth of Mr. Murray Posh.


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