罪过相提并论。现在请允许我把我自己的行为

和动机一一剖白一下，希望你弄明白了其中的

原委以后，将来可以不再象昨天晚上那样对我

严词苛责。在解释这些必要的事情时，如果我

迫不得已，要述述我自己的情绪，因而使你情

绪不快，我只得向你表示歉意。既是出于迫不

得已，那么再道歉未免就嫌可笑了。我到哈福

德郡不久，就和别人一样，看出了彬格莱先生

在当地所有的少女中偏偏看中了令姐。但是一

直等到在尼日斐花园开跳舞会的那个晚上，我

才顾虑到他当真对令姐有了爱恋之意。说到他

的恋爱方面，我以前也看得很多。在那次跳舞

会上，当我很荣幸地跟你跳舞时，我才听到威

廉·卢卡斯偶然说起彬格莱先生对令姐的殷勤

已经弄得满城风雨，大家都以为他们就要谈到

嫁娶问题。听他说起来，好象事情已经千稳万

妥，只是迟早问题罢了。从那时起，我就密切

注意着我朋友的行为，于是我看出了他对班纳

特小姐的钟情，果然和他往常的恋爱情形大不

相同。我也注意着令姐。她的神色和风度依旧

象平常那样落落大方，和蔼可亲，并没有钟情

于任何人的迹象。根据我那一晚上仔细观察的

情形看来，我确实认为她虽然乐意接受他的殷

勤，可是她并没有用深情密意来报答他。要是

这件事你没有弄错，那么错处一定在我；你对

于令姐既有透辟的了解，那么当然可能是我错

了。倘若事实果真如此，倘若果真是我弄错了

，迟到造成令姐的痛苦，那当然难怪你气愤。

可是我可以毫不犹豫地说，令姐当初的风度极

其洒脱，即使观察力最敏锐的人，也难免以为

；她尽管性情柔和，可是她的心不容易打动。

我当初确实希望她无动于中，可是我敢说，我

虽然主观上有我的希望，有我的顾虑，可是我

的观察和我的推断并不会受到主观上的影响。

我认为，令姐决不会因为我希望她无动于中，

她就当真无动于中；我的看法大公无私，我的

愿望也合情合理。我昨天晚上说，遇到这样门

户不相称的婚姻，轮到我自己身上的时候，我

必须用极大的感情上的力量圆心压制，至于说

到他们俩这一门婚姻，我所以要反对，还不光

光是为了这些理由，因为关于门户高低的问题

，我朋友并不象我那么重视。我所以反对这门

婚姻，还有别的一些叫人嫌忌的原因───这

些原因虽然到现在还存在，而且在两桩事里面

同样存在着，可是我早就尽力把它忘了，因为

好在眼不见为净。这里必须把这些原因说一说

，即使简单地说一说也好。你母亲娘家亲族虽

然叫人不太满意，可是比起你们自己家里人那

种完全没有体统的情形来，便简直显得无足轻

重。你三个妹妹都是始终一贯地做出许多没有

体统的事情来，有时候甚至连你父亲也难免。

请原谅我这样直言无讳，其实得罪了你，也使

我自己感到。痉你的骨肉至亲有了这些缺点，

当然会使你感到难受，我这样一说，当然会叫

你更不高兴，可是你只要想一想，你自己和你

姐姐举止优雅，人家非得没有责难到你们俩头

上，而且对你们褒奖备至，还赏识你们俩的见

识和个性，这对于你究竟还不失为一种安慰吧

。我还想跟你说一说；我那天晚上看了那种情

形，不禁越发确定了我对各个人的看法，越发

加深了我的偏见，觉得一定要阻止我的朋友，

不让他缔结这门最不幸的婚姻。他第二天就离

开尼日斐花园到伦敦去了，我相信你一定记得

，他本来打算去一下便立刻回来。




The part which I acted is now to be explained. -- His
sisters' uneasiness had been equally excited with my own;
our coincidence of feeling was soon discovered; and, alike
sensible that no time was to be lost in detaching their
brother, we shortlyresolved on joining him directly in
London. -- We accordingly went -- and there I readily engaged
in the office of pointing out to my friend, the certain evils
of such a choice. -- I described, and enforced them
earnestly. -- But, however this remonstrance might have
staggered or delayed his determination, I do not suppose that
it would ultimately have prevented the marriage, had it not
been seconded by the assurance, which I hesitated not in
giving, of your sister's indifference. He had before believed
her to return his affection with sincere, if not with equal,
regard. -- But Bingley has great natural modesty, with a
stronger dependence on my judgment than on his own. -- To
convince him, therefore, that he had deceived himself, was no
very difficult point. To persuade him against returning into
Hertfordshire, when that conviction had been given, was
scarcely the work of a moment. -- I cannot blame myself for
having done thus much. There is but one part of my conduct in
the whole affair, on which I do not reflect with satisfaction;
it is that I condescended to adopt the measures of art so far
as to conceal from him your sister's being in town. I knew it
myself, as it was known to Miss Bingley, but her brother is
even yet ignorant of it. -- That they might have met without
ill consequence is, perhaps, probable; -- but his regard did
not appear to me enough extinguished for him to see her without
some danger. -- Perhaps this concealment, this disguise, was
beneath me. -- It is done, however, and it was done for the
best. -- On this subject I have nothing more to say, no other
apology to offer. If I have wounded your sister's feelings, it
was unknowingly done; and though the motives which governed me
may to you very naturally appear insufficient, I have not yet
learnt to condemn them. --


我得在这里把我当初参与这件事的经过说明一

下。原来他的姐妹们当时跟我一样，深为这件

事感到不安。我们立刻发觉了彼此有同感，都

觉得应该赶快到伦敦去把她们这位兄弟隔离起

来，于是决定立刻动身。我们就这样走了。到

了那里，便由我负责向我朋友指出，他如果攀

上了这门亲事，必定有多少多少坏处。我苦口

婆心，再三劝说。我这一番规劝虽然动摇了他

的心愿，使他迟疑不决，可是，我当时要不是

那么十拿九稳地说，你姐姐对他并没有什么倾

心，那么这番规劝也许不会发生这样大的效力

，这门婚姻到头来也许终于阻档不了住。在我

没有进行这番劝说以前，他总以为令姐即使没

有以同样的钟情报答他，至少也是在竟诚期待

着他。但是彬格莱先生天性谦和，遇到任何事

情，只要我一出主意，他总是相信我胜过相信

他自己。我轻而易举地说服了他，使他相信这

事情是他自己一时糊涂。他既然有了这个信念

，我们便进一步说服他不要回到哈福德郡去，

这当然不费吹灰之力。我这样做，自己并没觉

得有什么不对。今天回想起来，我觉得只有一

件事做得不能叫自己安心，那就是说，令姐来

到城里的时候，我竟不择手段，把这个消息瞒

住了他。这件事不但我知道，彬格莱小姐也知

道，然而她哥哥一直到现在还蒙在鼓里。要是

让他们俩见了面，可能也不会有坏的后果，可

是我当时认为他并没有完全死心，见到她未必

能免于危险。我这样隐瞒，这样欺蒙，也许失

掉了我自己的身份。然而事情已经做了，而且

完全是出于一片好意。关于这件事，我没有什

么可以再说的了，也无用再道歉，如果我伤了

令姐的心，也是出于无意；你自然会以为我当

初这样做，理由不够充足，可是我到现在还没

有觉得有什么不对。




With respect to that other, more weighty accusation, of having
injured Mr. Wickham, I can only refute it by laying before you
the whole of his connection with my family. Of what he has
particularly accused me, I am ignorant; but of the truth of
what I shall relate, I can summon more than one witness of
undoubted veracity. Mr. Wickham is the son of a very
respectable man, who had for many years the management of all
the Pemberley estates; and whose good conduct in the discharge
of his trust naturally inclined my father to be of service to
him; and on George Wickham, who was his god-son, his kindness
was therefore liberally bestowed. My father supported him at
school, and afterwards at Cambridge; -- most important
assistance, as his own father, always poor from the
extravagance of his wife, would have been unable to give him a
gentleman's education. My father was not only fond of this
young man's society, whose manners were always engaging; he had
also the highest opinion of him, and hoping the church would be
his profession, intended to provide for him in it. As for
myself, it is many, many years since I first began to think of
him in a very different manner. The vicious propensities --
the want of principle, which he was careful to guard from the
knowledge of his best friend, could not escape the observation
of a young man of nearly the same age with himself, and who had
opportunities of seeing him in unguarded moments, which
Mr. Darcy could not have. Here again I shall give you pain --
to what degree you only can tell. But whatever may be the
sentiments which Mr. Wickham has created, a suspicion of their
nature shall not prevent me from unfolding his real character.
It adds even another motive. My excellent father died about
five years ago; and his attachment to Mr. Wickham was to the
last so steady, that in his will he particularly recommended it
to me to promote his advancement in the best manner that his
profession might allow, and, if he took orders, desired that a
valuable family living might be his as soon as it became
vacant. There was also a legacy of one thousand pounds. His
own father did not long survive mine, and within half a year
from these events Mr. Wickham wrote to inform me that, having
finally resolved against taking orders, he hoped I should not
think it unreasonable for him to expect some more immediate
pecuniary advantage, in lieu of the preferment by which he
could not be benefited. He had some intention, he added, of
studying the law, and I must be aware that the interest of one
thousand pounds would be a very insufficient support therein.
I rather wished than believed him to be sincere; but, at any
rate, was perfectly ready to accede to his proposal. I knew
that Mr. Wickham ought not to be a clergyman. The business was
therefore soon settled. He resigned all claim to assistance in
the church, were it possible that he could ever be in a
situation to receive it, and accepted in return three thousand
pounds. All connection between us seemed now dissolved. I
thought too ill of him to invite him to Pemberley, or admit his
society in town. In town, I believe, he chiefly lived, but his
studying the law was a mere pretence, and being now free from
all restraint, his life was a life of idleness and dissipation.
For about three years I heard little of him; but on the decease
of the incumbent of the living which had been designed for him,
he applied to me again by letter for the presentation. His
circumstances, he assured me, and I had no difficulty in
believing it, were exceedingly bad. He had found the law a
most unprofitable study, and was now absolutelyresolved on
being ordained, if I would present him to the living in
question -- of which he trusted there could be little doubt,
as he was well assured that I had no other person to provide
for, and I could not have forgotten my revered father's